A while ago i did a trade and the person has still not done their part, idk if they forgot me or if they just were not happy with my half of the trade. They never said anything on my part or even faved it. i don't know what to do, i messaged them before, asking about it and they said school was in the way but that never stopped them from drawing art for other people and uploading it. im not saying their name because i don't want to cause them trouble, but i also don't want to seem mean when i ask them again and i have no idea how to word it.



(vent, you don't have to read this if you don't want to)
for as long as i can remember ive had this problem, i could be sitting right in front of a teachers face but they would still mark me absent, i would be in the middle of a sentence and people would interrupt as if i was not even there. i never do vent posts because i know my problems are not for others to worry about. and when i ever think about posting something, i stop because, who cares. I have 76 watchers 3 of witch are irl friends, 1 of witch actually uses this site, and anyone else i felt might be a friend fall into the category of "they forgot me". my last journal where i apologized, only three of the people i was apologizing to actually commented (thank you so much^^) and the main reason for the post was to see if any of you wanted a new drawing or not, i love drawing, why would i be mad if you still wanted the art, i just wanted to know if you did or not. but i can only assume they didn't even read the title before deleting it from their notifications. I try to comment on things and fave things that i like, regardless of quality, and when it comes to other peoples vent i may not comment because ive messed up before, ive said something wrong and made it worse and im afaraid of doing that again.

when i favorite art i do it because, i like the character, i like the style, i like the concept, or it just looks nice.*aesthetic*
i feel like too many people go through their submission notifications, and only fave things that are beautiful works of digital art, or that involve their character, if you see something even remotely appealing to you FAVE IT!

I feel like almost everyone watching me are only here for free art, i indeed do allot of free art, but only because i cant receive money for it atm. but when i eventually have commissions, is everyone just gonna leave? when i know 76 people are gonna see something im so proud of and it only gets 1 fave, i wonder why. does it look bad? does no one like my character?

why do people not like traditional art? i understand if its on line paper or taken with a crappy camera at a bad angle, but i use clean paper and put all my effort into them, most of my traditional art im very proud of whereas most of my digital i feel needs work. but for some reason people would much rater have an awkward backroundless digital piece than a high effort traditional. I DONT EVEN USE VEXALS, I ONLY HAVE MS PAINT!

if you read this im not mad at anyone, i never am, im only ever mad at myself for not being able to do so much. im forgetful, i have hard time wording things, i suck at spelling so bad auto correct has no clue, and my social anxiety is so bad that i have small panic attacks replying to people sometimes. i just try so hard to make others happy that i sometimes forget about myself.