I am fucking bored...

No but seriously. 3 months with very limited internet (mobile hotspot) Has giving me quite the time to think and I thought I would share with you guys, if anyone really cares.

First thing is, I didn't realize how dependent I was. Despite still having some internet to browse the web and check telegram, I spent so much of my time just at my computer. I spent so much time playing games online and have lost my attention span. Now, after so long, I grew detached. I don't feel the urge to just jump on my computer first thing.

Secondly. I realized how superficial most of my friendships are online. Yea I miss talking to my friends, but it really has felt like most of them haven't even really missed me, or have just moved on. Kind of disappointing but at the same time, not really unexpected with how much of the furry fandom is... sorry guys, but friendships seem to be pretty fickle here. But! I do keep in touch with some on telegram, those who don't just shrug me off when they aren't feeling horny or when they feel like actually wanting attention >.> Close friends only, or those who actually care about who I am.

Thirdly. SO MUCH MORE TIME! I Have so much more on my mind anymore and spend long minutes just reflecting on things in my life, keeping up on housekeeping, or even home improvement. I have been able to plan out entire weeks and feel the urge to go out of the house more often. As time has gone on, I have felt even more detached from my electronics and even my phone. I don't even feel the need to take it out of my car at work! I even began to meditate and think towards my future.

Fourth. My interest in the internet has grown specific. If I want to know something, I will still go look it up, search for information. But I don't sit idly around waiting for the next thing to catch my eyes. Even more interesting Is I grow rather bored when I am just sitting online, waiting, or even doing something. Games hold my attention for only so long before I am putting them down and spending time talking with my roommate or playing with Parker.

And finally, fifth. Holy shit I actually am saving money???? So this came as a bit of an interesting surprise. With more keeping my attention and keeping me moving, my mood has improved, and thus, my urge to find things that MIGHT make me happy has gone done. I don't browse amazon, or newegg, or even look for artists here on FA as much, and so, my spending has been cut back. I have started shopping more locally on my outings and even then, don't buy it unless I need it. Pointless spending is almost gone!


All in all, My attention span is coming back as time passes, I find myself more able to remember things and get less distracted. Work has especially grown more productive and with the possibility of starting up carpentry classes, that is certainly good. Really has me thinking about the addictive properties of the internet and just how dependent everyone is becoming, how much craving for attention and affection from those on it seems to be for many. Facebook especially. >.> Who the hell cares if anyone wants to even read this or reply? While I enjoy discussion, I owe it to no one about what I post or say? Before I used to want to make something people would comment on, that shot of dopamine I got when someone did. Now it's just... eh?

Anyway! I do want to make a few more journals just to share with everyone. One such Journal is going to be about books and some very interesting stories I would love to recommend. That will come when I actually sit down again and feel like it. For now, See you around everyone!