Super tiny text? Are you sure the keyboard didn't....SHRINK you?

ᶰᵘᵘᵘᵘ ᵃᵐ ˢᵗᶦᶫᶫ ᵗʰᵉ ¹ ᵐᵉᵗᵉʳ ᵗᵃᶫᶫ ˢᑫᵘᶦʳʳᵉᶫ ᵒᶰᶫᶦᶰᵉ ᵃᶰᵈ ᵗʰᵉ ¹⋅⁹³ᵐ ᵍᵘʸ ᶦᶰ ʳᶫ ⋅

Stares up at the squirrel three times his height (in-character).
*WAVES*
How's the weather up there? (raises tail in question mark)

oh hiya , am fine , one meter tall isnt that big , but i can protect myself easier against predators like foxes or wolves :3

I've come up with a solution for that. I may not survive the encounter, but I'll get the last laugh. I've teamed up with some fleas carrying a combination of hantivirus and bubonic plaque.

YEAH I HATE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS. MY NEW DRAGONSIZE KEYBOARD ONLY ALLOWS ME TO ROAR ANYMORE.

ᶫᵒᶫ

BUT I GUESS ITS APPROPRIATE MANNERS FOR DRAGONS.

IT'S CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL.

THIS IS MY TAIL
THERE ARE MANY LIKE IT, BUT THIS ONE IS MINE
WITHOUT ME MY TAIL IS USELESS
AND WITHOUT MY TAIL, I AM USELESS

EVEN WITH YOUR TAIL YOU'RE PRETTY USELESS.
GET A GUN.

I..... you......

Don't make me grab the punishment carrot again bird.

I... I LIKE TAILS.

My keyboard just moans when I press its buttons.....

Put your glasses on squirrel, a cat fell asleep on your laptop again.

Nuuuu its not a cat, its this keyboard. Each button has a different sounding moan..... and after a while it gets sticky....

Those are nipples, it's a pregnant cat, hardly unusual on Sqrl's turf.

Oh wait.... wait false alarm.

I just realized I was actually touching mysel...... uhhh, I mean scratching Myself..... yeah scratching Myself.

The cat got mad at you didn't he? (No spelling mistake, Sqrl.)Tsk, you never listen, that's your problem squirrel. Next time leave well enough alone.

Its not my fault bird, we squirrels get distract.... oh look an acorn *Nom nom*

Now as I was saying, we squirrels sometimes get distracted if... Oh look, another acorn *Nom nom*

*Looks at you* Now umm, what were we talking about? Oh wait, can I touch your beak?

Not right now squirrel, someone's been messing with my anal bead collection. Two are missing.

Again??

Tsk tsk tsk... how many times have I told you bird? Don't put them with your marble collection, or next to anything shiny. You know
how Raccoon gets when he is around shiny things.

Indeed, you still have half that collection up there. (Any idea on just when they'll come out? I know he rammed 'em in pretty hard, but surely a week is long enough?)

You know I just have no idea anymore bird..... but I sure do get tired of Coon making me shake and dance for him so he can
hear them hitting each other and making noises.

Well he broke the lava lamp, so there's a small relief there.

But damn if you don't make a racket when you jog.

I have marbles inside me bird, what do you expect?

So uhh... are you still up for rubbing My belly? I sure could use it.

No.

*Sticks you on a keyboard and mails you to Hawkbit.*

ᶦˢ ᶦᵗ ʷᶦʳᵉᶫᵉˢˢ⋅⋅⋅ᵗᵃᶦᶫᶫᵉˢ ᵃᶰᵈ ᵈᵒᵉˢ ᶦᵗ ʰᵃˢ ᵃ ᶫᵒᶰᵍ ᵇᵉᵃᵏ﹖

Long beak?

Nah thats just a Kiwi who keeps commenting on your journal.

I hear if you rub it three times it has a surprise.

ᵃᵐ ᶰᵒᵗ ᵍᵒᶰᶰᵃ ʳᵘᵇ ˢᵒᵐᵉᵗʰᶦᶰᵍ ᶫᵒᶰᵍ ,ᵗʰᶦᶰʸ, ᵃᶰᵈ ᵇᵒʷᵉᵈ ʷʰᵃᵗ ᶫᵒᵒᵏˢ ᶫᶦᵏᵉ ᵃ ᵖᵉᶰᶦˢᵇᵒᶰᵉ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵃ ʳᵃᶜᶜᵒᵒᶰ ﹔ᴾ

Hey now, don't insult the poor guy; he was born that way, squirrel can't help it.

Plus I've been busy lately, he's getting lonely.

Look at this beak
Judge it not by its size
Rub it three times and it has a surprise

The squirrel pecker, so easy to miss,
So stunted in size, so easy to diss,
Just give it a rub,he doesn't last long,
One, two, three, hear squirrelsong!

Here we have a beak
So smooth, certainly in its peak
Careful, don't rub it too raw
Or else she will have to call the law

Oh why aren't there any laws,
Against those roving squirrel paws?
This crazy squirrel, what a dope,
All day long he'll grope and grope!

He has a fetish, he is weak.
(Well he has MANY, but this one's beak.)
When he sees one, it's too much,
He cannot help himself but touch.

There's not a bird who's safe at night,
That darn squirrel just ain't right!
But his latest goal's too much you see,
He tried too hard to fondle Scree.

Scree!!!

Hey did you know He is friends to all rabbits?

Really? I thought it was FRIEND to all rabbits. I must have been mistaken, what with me always making spelling errors n' all.

Aaahhh damn, your right

Scree is FRIEND to all rabbits.

Skate is FRIENDS to all rabbits :P

That's bad grammar there Skate, there is only one Skate (A fact of which we're all endlessly thankful for.) so he can only be a FRIEND of someone or ones. You wouldn't catch me saying for example 'Skater has always been a friends of mine.'

Now if there were a group of you it'd work out better, 'Squirrels are friends to all ice' say.

Or maybe it's another spelling mistake and you meant to write 'Skater's in the ends of all rabbits.'

Hmmm, I see

Well right now Im at the end of your beak!

*Rubs*

*Jabs*

Squeak!!

So thats the surprise eh?

Rub the beak three times and you get jabbed :P

It's not like I haven't penetrated you before squirrel.

This is true, this is true indeed.

You love 'punishing' me when I have misbehaved, like that time I licked all the icing off that cake you were making.

That wasn't a cake, it was a cake TIN, and that wasn't icing, it was paint. How did you even...?

Well that explains why I had food poisoning for 3 days after that.... I licked so much of that stuff too...

*Looks at you*

Why would you have paint in a cake Tin Bird?

The paint bucket cracked of course. What else can you keep it in where it won't dry out?

Squirrels, no practicality at all!

Well next time make sure you label what it is, so I don't do that again.

You know how curious I am Zib.

It WAS labelled.

You can't read.


Also, stay outta my mousetrap collection.

I will Zib as long as you don't set them with My favorite kind of cheese!

Damn, it's from the same company you got those 'herbal enahncers' from isn't it? They never did compensate you for that permanent shrinkage. Oh well, they match now I guess.

ᶰᵒ ᶦᵗ'ˢ ᶰᵒᵗ ᵃ ᵇᶦᵒᶫᵒᵍᶦᶜᵃᶫ ᵍʳᵉᵉᶰ ᵏᵉʸᵇᵒᵃʳᵈ , ᶦᵗ'ˢ ᵒᶰᵉ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵒˢᵉ ˢᵐᵃᶫᶫ⁻ᵖʳᶦᶜᵉ ᵗʰᶦᶰᵍᶦᵉˢ ᶠʳᵒᵐ﹕
https://youtu.be/dPmZqsQNzGA?t=20

You get what you pay for my friend, which explains a lot of what you own.

Also my Skype got hacked, so I had to set up another ZFQFMIB account. The other one's permanently offline.

ʸᵒᵘ ᵏᶰᵒʷ ʷʰᵉʳᵉ ᵗᵒ ᶠᶦᶰᵈ ᵐᵉ ᶦᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ᵈᵃʳᵉ ᵗᵒ ᵗᵃᶫᵏ ᵗᵒ ᵗʰᵉ ᵈᵘᵗᶜʰ ᵗʳᵉᵉʳᵃᵗ⋅

ˢᑫᵘᶦʳʳᵉᶫᵗᵃᶦᶫ ᶦˢ ᵗʰᵉ ᶰᵃᵐᵉ ᵒᶰ ˢᵏʸᵖᵉ ﹕³

I tried, there's like a dozen squirreltails on there. It's madness.

nonsense , there's only one squirreltail over there from the Netherlands

Which one of these (And a few others) would he be then? https://www.dropbox.com/s/1zcjy303j.....ot_28.png?dl=0

First one, all small letters, but i find it strange that it doesnt show the country behind the name, it does that here, andthere's only one in the netherlands, owell i'll add u to make things easier

Cute April Fool's Day gag. Whether it is you pulling it off or the company that sent you the keyboard.

it was just a gag with a shrinking text tool :3

I'll trade you. :3

nuuuuu!!! am to cute ! *puppy eyes*

Small keyboard problems huh? That is a bit of a problem. Personally I find mine a little on the large size, but at least I can read the text. Keyboard sizes really should be more standardized.

for hooves you need a keyboard like that ;3

˙uɐᴉlɐɹʇsn∀ uᴉ ǝdʎʇ ʎluo uɐɔ ʇᴉ ǝǝs uɐɔ noʎ sɐ ʇnq 'ɐᴉlɐɹʇsn∀ ɯoɹɟ pɹɐoqʎǝʞ ɐ ʇɥƃnoq ʇsnɾ I ˙ɯǝlqoɹd ɹɐlᴉɯᴉs ɐ ǝʌɐɥ I

did you try to hold your keyboard upside down ? that mostly solve the problem ;3

that font size is terrible. its hard for me to read even if I zoom in. if I don't zoom in I can't read it at all!
I don't mean to bitch, just providing feedback

Making it look terrible was part of the joke :p

whoops :)