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Review: "Controlling Jennifer"
8 years ago
So here's my first review! Not sure exactly what kinda format these ought to take but eventually one will emerge from the chaos. Here we go.
This is the very first story in the erotic mind control genre that I ever learned of. It's also the oldest one I know, so far as such stories first shared on the Internet are concerned. Written by one Daniel Steven Reinker in 1993 and originally shared on rec.arts.erotica, very quickly it ended up being propagated to almost every online repository of online erotic fiction. I didn't become aware of it until 1996, about a month or two after I'd first created Katrice on Tapestries. Someone there told me my character reminded them of that story and pointed it out to me.
You can still read this story on the EMCSA: http://mcstories.com/ControllingJen.....fer/index.html
Spoilers ahead! In case you wanted to read it.
The story is told from the point of view of the person being controlled, Jennifer Anne Cailly. She's just minding her own business being a university student when some guy, named Mark Robert Antonio, literally steps in out of nowhere and asks her to be his slave and if not, he'll take control of her because that's a power he has. Naturally she doesn't believe him and tells him where to go, but it turns out his mysterious power is real and he uses it on her. The next thing she knows, she's doing some very crazy scary things with no rhyme or reason, and with no control over herself.
When I first read this story, I thought it was pretty damned hot. Well, elements of it at least. That it was told from Jennifer's perspective was a big one. That lets you get into her mind and know what she's feeling. Right away you can tell that Mark's control over her is pretty absolute. Either her desires instantly change so that she wants nothing more in the world than to do what he'd previously instructed, or else her body acts without and against her conscious will.
In particular there was one scene early in the story that really got to me. Jennifer was trying to study in a library but Mark had made it so her pleasure would build up for half a minute until she was ready to burst, but then it would just fizzle without any release, only to start building up again a minute later. It was crazy and it was outlandish, but in her world it was also very real and there wasn't anything she could do about it. Not directly, anyway. It was this sort of thing that, with the way it was written, got me into the story well enough that I could imagine myself as Jennifer. That was happening to me and it was turning me the fuck on.
Beyond that scene, there were several other little tidbits here and there that got me hooked, such as one bit in a scene in a restaurant where Mark told Jennifer she'd start undressing herself slowly over time whenever she raised her voice. A few minutes later she did just that, and her hands immediately started unclasping some buttons. That made her quiet down right away but her hands didn't stop until those buttons were unfastened. That kind of detail bore into my mind and to this day I still describe things Katrice is made to do in a similar way.
Despite how much I loved such parts of this story, I have to admit that it's not very well written. And it's clear that it runs out of steam pretty quickly and by the end it's turned into a meandering mess. It's not even a finished tale. It stops with a promise of another chapter to come, but it never came. That was it. Also, I think the writer could have gone into greater detail about what Jennifer was feeling and thinking in those times Mark was controlling her. He did that to some extent, which is what hooked me. But in my opinion he didn't do that nearly enough! And sometimes he just kind of glossed over such details, like he was getting bored with his own story and just wanted to get on with it.
Nowadays the story's general premise rubs me the wrong way. Doing the sorts of things Mark does to the people he targets is of course highly unethical, but more than that it makes no damned sense that any of the women he wanted as his "slaves" would ever do so willingly. Not without him using his power on them. And as he wants them to be his without him having to resort to exercising his mysterious ability, well I'd say he has a problem then doesn't he? This is the biggest difference between Jennifer and Katrice. Katrice invites this sort of thing toward her. She seeks it out. She might try to deny that she's doing this in order to maintain the pretense that it's all just happening to her and she's entirely innocent, but that's another problem!
And so in my head canon about this story, Jennifer made a deal with Mark beforehand to have him do those things to her, because it was something she had a deep desire to experience. Only she also asked him to make her forget that she made that deal in the first place, because it was important to her for it to feel as real to her as possible. All the people she was made to interact with were also in on this, and were quite likely her friends whom she trusted anyway. Especially the ones she was going to be made to have sex with later on! But knowing how much she wanted to have this prolonged experience, they all agreed to participate and promised not to reveal the truth. And that's how the story would end, with the revelation that she was the one who caused this all to happen to herself. Mark's power is real, but he only controls people who ask him first, and he's never cavalier with his ability. Because that's the only way it would really work. If you don't get excited and aroused at losing control over yourself, then when someone does that to you it's going to be a terrible and hellish experience. Jennifer has to like it. She needs to want it. She has to be the one who seeks it out, because what are the chances that some kinky body controller is just going to happen to enter her life and start playing with her in the ways she wants to be played with? Makes sense to me, anyway!
This is the very first story in the erotic mind control genre that I ever learned of. It's also the oldest one I know, so far as such stories first shared on the Internet are concerned. Written by one Daniel Steven Reinker in 1993 and originally shared on rec.arts.erotica, very quickly it ended up being propagated to almost every online repository of online erotic fiction. I didn't become aware of it until 1996, about a month or two after I'd first created Katrice on Tapestries. Someone there told me my character reminded them of that story and pointed it out to me.
You can still read this story on the EMCSA: http://mcstories.com/ControllingJen.....fer/index.html
Spoilers ahead! In case you wanted to read it.
The story is told from the point of view of the person being controlled, Jennifer Anne Cailly. She's just minding her own business being a university student when some guy, named Mark Robert Antonio, literally steps in out of nowhere and asks her to be his slave and if not, he'll take control of her because that's a power he has. Naturally she doesn't believe him and tells him where to go, but it turns out his mysterious power is real and he uses it on her. The next thing she knows, she's doing some very crazy scary things with no rhyme or reason, and with no control over herself.
When I first read this story, I thought it was pretty damned hot. Well, elements of it at least. That it was told from Jennifer's perspective was a big one. That lets you get into her mind and know what she's feeling. Right away you can tell that Mark's control over her is pretty absolute. Either her desires instantly change so that she wants nothing more in the world than to do what he'd previously instructed, or else her body acts without and against her conscious will.
In particular there was one scene early in the story that really got to me. Jennifer was trying to study in a library but Mark had made it so her pleasure would build up for half a minute until she was ready to burst, but then it would just fizzle without any release, only to start building up again a minute later. It was crazy and it was outlandish, but in her world it was also very real and there wasn't anything she could do about it. Not directly, anyway. It was this sort of thing that, with the way it was written, got me into the story well enough that I could imagine myself as Jennifer. That was happening to me and it was turning me the fuck on.
Beyond that scene, there were several other little tidbits here and there that got me hooked, such as one bit in a scene in a restaurant where Mark told Jennifer she'd start undressing herself slowly over time whenever she raised her voice. A few minutes later she did just that, and her hands immediately started unclasping some buttons. That made her quiet down right away but her hands didn't stop until those buttons were unfastened. That kind of detail bore into my mind and to this day I still describe things Katrice is made to do in a similar way.
Despite how much I loved such parts of this story, I have to admit that it's not very well written. And it's clear that it runs out of steam pretty quickly and by the end it's turned into a meandering mess. It's not even a finished tale. It stops with a promise of another chapter to come, but it never came. That was it. Also, I think the writer could have gone into greater detail about what Jennifer was feeling and thinking in those times Mark was controlling her. He did that to some extent, which is what hooked me. But in my opinion he didn't do that nearly enough! And sometimes he just kind of glossed over such details, like he was getting bored with his own story and just wanted to get on with it.
Nowadays the story's general premise rubs me the wrong way. Doing the sorts of things Mark does to the people he targets is of course highly unethical, but more than that it makes no damned sense that any of the women he wanted as his "slaves" would ever do so willingly. Not without him using his power on them. And as he wants them to be his without him having to resort to exercising his mysterious ability, well I'd say he has a problem then doesn't he? This is the biggest difference between Jennifer and Katrice. Katrice invites this sort of thing toward her. She seeks it out. She might try to deny that she's doing this in order to maintain the pretense that it's all just happening to her and she's entirely innocent, but that's another problem!
And so in my head canon about this story, Jennifer made a deal with Mark beforehand to have him do those things to her, because it was something she had a deep desire to experience. Only she also asked him to make her forget that she made that deal in the first place, because it was important to her for it to feel as real to her as possible. All the people she was made to interact with were also in on this, and were quite likely her friends whom she trusted anyway. Especially the ones she was going to be made to have sex with later on! But knowing how much she wanted to have this prolonged experience, they all agreed to participate and promised not to reveal the truth. And that's how the story would end, with the revelation that she was the one who caused this all to happen to herself. Mark's power is real, but he only controls people who ask him first, and he's never cavalier with his ability. Because that's the only way it would really work. If you don't get excited and aroused at losing control over yourself, then when someone does that to you it's going to be a terrible and hellish experience. Jennifer has to like it. She needs to want it. She has to be the one who seeks it out, because what are the chances that some kinky body controller is just going to happen to enter her life and start playing with her in the ways she wants to be played with? Makes sense to me, anyway!
