It's still fresh. I think the worst part is that I believed that he could love me too. :3 Boys are silly creatures. We can heal together! If you're hurting, that is.

I'm sorry to hear what you are going through. But trust me when I say this... It's not the end of the world. Some day you'll meet someone else and forget about this person. If you don't want to forget that's up to you but maybe it would be better if you did. Just take life one day at a time. It will hurt for a long time probably. I've had people walk out on me at least twice and both times it hurt so bad. So very bad. *hugs you like a friend*

Yeah I'm already feeling a little better. Everyday gets a bit easier and I find that I don't think of him constantly like I used to. *noses* It was nice to hear from you too.

That's kind of quick unless you posted this journal a long time after you broke up. But still it took me a good year or two to come to terms (can't say I ever "got over it") when I broke up with my last lover. She told me a lot of things I liked to hear and I found out she didn't really mean them as much as she thought she did. Long story short she found someone else to say those things to. It hurt. But I've moved on. But like I said it took a while.

We didn't really date. I wanted to and he said he wanted to. Told me he loved me. But then he said he couldn't be with me because he was afraid of hurting me. The fact that he roped me in and told me all these things about how amazing I was... only to walk away is what hurt the most. I'll miss him for a long time, but I know that I deserve better and can find someone amazing. It makes it easier to smile.

one more to the list..... Sad. I myself was raped too. When I was 19 there was this co-worker who made a lot of gay jokes and I made the mistake of saying something like "One of the few things I hate more than anything is those people that pretend to be gay just to make fun of gays. If you're going to hit on guys you better mean it or knock it the fuck off." And uh the last part of that sentence was what got me into trouble. My main mistake was my attraction to sexually aggressive men that take the initiative and show dominance even if the other person isn't quite a sub (me). It still turns me on but now I'm A LOT more careful.

In the end suffice it to say there are some terrible people out there (men mostly). I would just forget about that guy if he did that to you. My sister was also with a guy like that. He pretended to love her and say all kinds of nice things. Then the night after they had sex for the first time he left and she never saw him again in her life. She kept it a secret for a long time and it's probably good that she did because I might not have been able to stop myself from finding that man and beating him within an inch of his life. Then I'd probably go to jail. So ... yeah.