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JURASSIC HOGWARTS AU
8 years ago
General
Object In Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear.
I come up with the best/worst ideas while mowing the lawn. Namely, this HP/JP crossover musing.
What if John Hammond was the headmaster of Howgwarts?
First I thought, what if my beloved scientists were students, that could be cute... but nope, they should be professors, because canonically they ARE ALL PROFESSORS.
Alan Grant is a Hufflepuff, best friends with Hagrid and teaches Care of Dangerous Creatures. (Because dinosaurs of course exist again, it can't rightly be called care of Magical creatures, although some dinosaurs are magic because magic and dinosaurs.) It's been obvious that he's a wizard ever since the first movie when he made that computer fritz out. (Also, Sam Neill is actually Merlin, that's common knowledge.) AND OWEN IS HIS BEST STUDENT. :D
Ellie Sattler is a Ravenclaw and teaches Herbology, because of course she would.
Ian Malcolm is a Hufflepuff(of course he is) and took that Defense Against the Dark Arts job. Be careful, Ian.
Professor Henry Wu is a Ravenclaw(or Slytherin? Hmm.) and Potions teacher.
Headmaster Hammond employs them and they show up only to find... UNEXPECTED DINOSAURS running around on school grounds, what else? Professor Wu had been busy.
Nedry is Peter Pettigrew. :P
The thought of raptors chasing kids through the halls of Hogwarts pleases Chewtoy greatly. Them scaling that moving staircase could be a fucking amazing scene, yo.
Yes, dinosaurs seem like less of a threat to wizards... until them raptors start HURLING SPELLS! They are under NO moral obligation to not Avada Kedavra motherfuckers left and right. Hammond and Wu never thought about THAT. Chaos Theory!
I doubt I'll ever actually write this, but it's fun. :3
What if John Hammond was the headmaster of Howgwarts?
First I thought, what if my beloved scientists were students, that could be cute... but nope, they should be professors, because canonically they ARE ALL PROFESSORS.
Alan Grant is a Hufflepuff, best friends with Hagrid and teaches Care of Dangerous Creatures. (Because dinosaurs of course exist again, it can't rightly be called care of Magical creatures, although some dinosaurs are magic because magic and dinosaurs.) It's been obvious that he's a wizard ever since the first movie when he made that computer fritz out. (Also, Sam Neill is actually Merlin, that's common knowledge.) AND OWEN IS HIS BEST STUDENT. :D
Ellie Sattler is a Ravenclaw and teaches Herbology, because of course she would.
Ian Malcolm is a Hufflepuff(of course he is) and took that Defense Against the Dark Arts job. Be careful, Ian.
Professor Henry Wu is a Ravenclaw(or Slytherin? Hmm.) and Potions teacher.
Headmaster Hammond employs them and they show up only to find... UNEXPECTED DINOSAURS running around on school grounds, what else? Professor Wu had been busy.
Nedry is Peter Pettigrew. :P
The thought of raptors chasing kids through the halls of Hogwarts pleases Chewtoy greatly. Them scaling that moving staircase could be a fucking amazing scene, yo.
Yes, dinosaurs seem like less of a threat to wizards... until them raptors start HURLING SPELLS! They are under NO moral obligation to not Avada Kedavra motherfuckers left and right. Hammond and Wu never thought about THAT. Chaos Theory!
I doubt I'll ever actually write this, but it's fun. :3
