FA+
Shop
Well it's been a long time since I held a grudge...
8 years ago
General
This is the journal header. Nothing to see here, get to reading the actual journal yah goof!
...and I still don't. Grudges aren't worth holding onto.
But I don't forget what some people have done, be it to me or others. (mostly me because I'm a little narcissistic like that) But the point is while most will move on, and so will I, I won't forget what transpired.
Still I do sometimes wish I had the opportunity to open a channel with those that have wronged me, or that I have wronged to discuss it. Yeah, I understand that a certain point down the line it's old news but it doesn't hurt to work it out. Afterall discussing events is how we properly move on and can grow as people, learn from what we did and improve ourselves with that knowledge.
Also...I don't like leaving things on bad terms. Regardless of what may have happened it makes me feel bad that the last interaction you might have with someone is tainted in hate or anger, or some other slew of negative feelings. Heck even if I was the one at fault, I'll come to terms with that and want a chance to apologise for my actions and to explain myself.
This may sound weird but this is why I really dislike the Block feature on websites. I understand they are a necessity but it blocks off any chance for people to come clean, it blocks off the chance to set things right. If you're willing to listen to what someone has to say you can put it behind you and go forward on neutral terms at the absolute least.
Meanwhile if you block them and completely oust any chance for them to speak, you're just gonna go away from it resenting them or continuing to hate them whenever you see them around.
You know what I think it is? People are scared to talk these days. Sure this is a hugely unsubstantiated claim, but it's just my gut instinct based on experiences. People are scared to talk. They see the smallest inkling of something they don't like and it's immediately shut off, rather than challenged.
....
I dunno. Just some brain dump stuff. I'm not sure what my overall point here is, interpret this as you please.
Take care of yourselves out there. Peace <3
In the past I've been very prideful, as well as hot headed. I also have a really bad habit of not knowing when to shut the fuck up and step down from a situation. Which needless to say hasn't helped in some encounters I've had in the past, even when I haven't been the instigator or one at fault.
Over the years though I've been bettering myself in that regard. Pride is a worthless thing to latch onto in my mind, and sometimes knowing when to say nothing at all can make for a much more positive outcome.
Lile you said, knowing when you've gone too far is a good thing to know, and I admit, I've taken things irreversibly too far.
In the end however, no one is perfect, and we all make mistakes. The important thing for lots of people to learn however, is to learn from those mistakes. Learn the difference between causation and correlation, and finally, learn not to jump to conclusions.
But really what I meant was probably less pride and more so....well, you ever been in an argument? It escalates and escalates, and in the end you keep going just because you want to have the final word no matter what? THAT is what I meant, I just worded a little oddly. I guess because the phrase "Swallow your pride" can be applied to that situation.
And yeah....people are afraid to talk...communication these days sucks by default, and it's something that has to be emphasized and built strongly in any relationship with another person. I had a really close friend really teach me the value of that over the last few years, and it's honestly changed my outlook and how I interact with people as a whole. I would love to see people really start using their words rather than shutting folks out. Anything can be worked through, and talked over...people just have to want to do it.
If there's opposing opinions or viewpoints on the board people seem to always go for the throat, instead of having a meaningful discussion about it or understanding that they're not going to turn the other side to their point of view. No it's always bathed in bloodlust and outright hatred for the holder of the opposing view....