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I've noticed something. *Venting, stand clear*
8 years ago
That is to say, I've been continually observing instances of this phenomenon.
...I'm really good at making people not like me, without even trying. Not to say that they HATE me, they just really don't like me.
Paired with the fact that in most situations I dislike people in general, that's all good and fine.
But when it happens with my friends... that's obviously a different bucket of snakes entirely.
Seriously, I have little to no control over it. I suppose that's a lie, I could try to be more likeable. Even attempting such would likely make me violently ill.
All I've ever done is be myself. Yet I've managed to, on numerous occasions, unintentionally ostracize myself from my social triangle (I would say "circle", but there's only two people I ever really talk to. I should actually be implying a singular connection, as one of those people has been very quiet due to other circumstances).
They're good people, they always come back around after I've put them off. But it just keeps happening.
I'd like to have friends, but at this rate I'm happy to still have acquaintances. Most of the 347 people I'm watching have long since disappeared, those few that are left are silent or actually have a watcher base.
Out of the 142 accounts listed as watching me, as far as I know they're all silent, dead, or gone.
At this point I think it's safe to say that somewhere deep inside I despise my own existence. I am a cold, bitter individual who sees little light in their future. I'm unsure why I keep coming back here to make journals, and I hate you all.
...I'm really good at making people not like me, without even trying. Not to say that they HATE me, they just really don't like me.
Paired with the fact that in most situations I dislike people in general, that's all good and fine.
But when it happens with my friends... that's obviously a different bucket of snakes entirely.
Seriously, I have little to no control over it. I suppose that's a lie, I could try to be more likeable. Even attempting such would likely make me violently ill.
All I've ever done is be myself. Yet I've managed to, on numerous occasions, unintentionally ostracize myself from my social triangle (I would say "circle", but there's only two people I ever really talk to. I should actually be implying a singular connection, as one of those people has been very quiet due to other circumstances).
They're good people, they always come back around after I've put them off. But it just keeps happening.
I'd like to have friends, but at this rate I'm happy to still have acquaintances. Most of the 347 people I'm watching have long since disappeared, those few that are left are silent or actually have a watcher base.
Out of the 142 accounts listed as watching me, as far as I know they're all silent, dead, or gone.
At this point I think it's safe to say that somewhere deep inside I despise my own existence. I am a cold, bitter individual who sees little light in their future. I'm unsure why I keep coming back here to make journals, and I hate you all.
I don't dislike you. Sorry you feel this way, though I feel this way sometimes as well.
I do float around a bit if you wanna talk or something.
Though I'm often more on the quiet side, I'm around if you wanna talk about stuff.