I'll be honest now and never will I be more honest than right now in this journal. I'm a lie. I am indeed a liar. I lie every day and every conversation because I am afraid. Afraid of people seeing the real me which is a scared and very average person. I tell lies about my experiences to make my life seem adventerous and dangerous but in reality I lead a boring life. I am a depressed ball of fear and anxiety. I will begin telling the truth now.

My name is Matt and I am an average red haired human being. I weigh 266 lbs and stand at 5' 11". I have a fear of spiders and I scream at the sight of them. I live with my parents and have no job. I've never had drawing or writing classes outside middle school a long time ago. I became a furry to attract the attention of a furry artist and later regretted it. However I gained interest in the fandom and stayed. I started to draw and write only a 3 years ago. I later gained depression and anxiety from the site and now I think it's permanent. I have only twice brken a bone and that was when i was a kid.
now for my sins.
Again I lie, but I am also manipulative. FOr some reason I feel good when I know I can control a person. I've never done anything outside pursuading and I dont plan on ever doing something like that or more ever again. I enjoy gore and hard vore and popping NOT sexually, but as an element. I even made an account for it which leads to one of my biggest lies.  50_Shades_of_Red this is also me. I created it only with the intention of having more freedom with expressing my interests because deep inside I am monster. I have anger and trst issues as well as me for some reason pushing people away.
I am an Art Whore. As in the sense that I crave art of my characters. I hate that part of me. I am also manipulative in the sense that I lie and persuade in order to recieve art. I am such a whore. Im sorry to all artists Ive done this to and if you want I will remove your art from my page.
I believe that's it. But now I will face the consequences of y actions openly.