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Life Status: Danger Level
7 years ago
General
The Storm King speaks! Will it be anything useful or amusing?
Alright, how to begin this.. WARNING: HIGH AMOUNT OF SWEARING, DEPRESSION, POTENTIAL SUICIDAL THOUGHTS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Right. First thing is first. Coming up June 1, I'll have to find a place to be moving out by that time, or I'm living with I don't fucking know, or on the streets.. I don't even fucking know if Fort Saskatchewan has a fucking homeless shelter! My job has gotten me stressed the fuck out, because I can't bloody be able to be awake during most of the day, to get out and about to hand out resumes for work of any fucking sort.
My dad wants the best for me, yet, I feel lost and panicked as the deadline approaches. I have less than a month, and I got barely any fucking money saved up. I barely have any hours to work with either, as my boss constantly is just..
I want to find a job, to get one that won't have me feeling like shit all the time. I've applied all over this small fucking town, and I keep getting shit from my dad for it.
I DIDN'T FUCKING LIVE IN A BIG FUCKING CITY YOU RETARDED FUCKWIT!
I just recently got myself a phone.. Flipphone, but fuck all the smart phones out there, I have no need for fancy shit that would die so quickly on me.
Another thing is aa falling out of a good friend, who, on top of my boss Monday morning (night shift is sooo much fun) yelling at me, and hitting a wall in his anger at me fucking up on no less that four things, sweeping the freezer, cleaning drive-thru, and muffins out on display and not filling up the fondant enough(Tim Hortons baker/stocker). He's gotten on the nerves of all the night shift staff, almost making a number of them wanting to either go on strike or quit... which a few of the ones I've worked with before having done so as well, along with me, before getting rehired.
Well, with this good friend, jealousy at art has killed it. Their envy at it, has simply pushed me into closing up from them, to force myself to focus on my own life first, before I end up.. Gone, forever.
What should I do? What can I do? What the fuck would I be able to do, to help not only myself, but.. IDK.
Today, yesterday... This whole month.. Years.. Fuck it.
I might be feeling anxiety and depression, and anger as well, with some thoughts on suicide.. But I know I can't leave yet. I can't leave because there is someone I'd hurt worse than simply myself, or my family.. She knows who she is, and despite being halfway across the world from me, she'd learn somehow..
Right. First thing is first. Coming up June 1, I'll have to find a place to be moving out by that time, or I'm living with I don't fucking know, or on the streets.. I don't even fucking know if Fort Saskatchewan has a fucking homeless shelter! My job has gotten me stressed the fuck out, because I can't bloody be able to be awake during most of the day, to get out and about to hand out resumes for work of any fucking sort.
My dad wants the best for me, yet, I feel lost and panicked as the deadline approaches. I have less than a month, and I got barely any fucking money saved up. I barely have any hours to work with either, as my boss constantly is just..
I want to find a job, to get one that won't have me feeling like shit all the time. I've applied all over this small fucking town, and I keep getting shit from my dad for it.
I DIDN'T FUCKING LIVE IN A BIG FUCKING CITY YOU RETARDED FUCKWIT!
I just recently got myself a phone.. Flipphone, but fuck all the smart phones out there, I have no need for fancy shit that would die so quickly on me.
Another thing is aa falling out of a good friend, who, on top of my boss Monday morning (night shift is sooo much fun) yelling at me, and hitting a wall in his anger at me fucking up on no less that four things, sweeping the freezer, cleaning drive-thru, and muffins out on display and not filling up the fondant enough(Tim Hortons baker/stocker). He's gotten on the nerves of all the night shift staff, almost making a number of them wanting to either go on strike or quit... which a few of the ones I've worked with before having done so as well, along with me, before getting rehired.
Well, with this good friend, jealousy at art has killed it. Their envy at it, has simply pushed me into closing up from them, to force myself to focus on my own life first, before I end up.. Gone, forever.
What should I do? What can I do? What the fuck would I be able to do, to help not only myself, but.. IDK.
Today, yesterday... This whole month.. Years.. Fuck it.
I might be feeling anxiety and depression, and anger as well, with some thoughts on suicide.. But I know I can't leave yet. I can't leave because there is someone I'd hurt worse than simply myself, or my family.. She knows who she is, and despite being halfway across the world from me, she'd learn somehow..
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