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Update I guess
7 years ago
I tend to keep my rl happenings and hardships hidden/away from life on here but kinda just at a peek currently and I can't keep trying.
Things aren't really going well for me right now, I've been depressed and getting more depressed with every day... I'm just getting tired of shit happening, things that are good not happening and all.
I've had no motivation to do anything but lay in bed and sleep... To escape everything and be in my dreams which are kinda better, hence why alot of y'all likely haven't seen/heard from me lately, I apologise but yeah... I don't even have motivation to play a fucking video game, I turn it on and just kinda sit there and have no will to do anything... Last few drawing's have been a just me FORCING myself through which I hate doing as it's uncomfortable.
On drawing, after I finish (at some point) these requests I have, I can't do more, I can't. I can't go through the time and stress of doing pics (especially when back in college) without something more than a thankyou, but since no one likes my work enough to commission me, it just kinda leads me into what the hell to do.
Streaming also has been hit by all this too, when I DO stream, it just makes worse cause usually only like 1 or 2 people arrive, which is fine but it still internally hits me, of course these two things are also affected by the fact me (and my rl family) are struggling with just weekly groceries so financially, we are NOT good... Hell, I can't even afford batteries for my xbox controller so once the pair in it now go, that's it.
I have thought about gofundme and such but I refuse to be that kinda guy (yet)... But with how things are going, likely will get to that point, even if it'll likely fly as good as commissions and streaming, which is no.
I don't care if this sounds ranty or all cry-y but had to get it out, tired of literally crying and holding it in, I'm going to sleep (again) now as I said I do often.
Hope people have a goodnight.
Things aren't really going well for me right now, I've been depressed and getting more depressed with every day... I'm just getting tired of shit happening, things that are good not happening and all.
I've had no motivation to do anything but lay in bed and sleep... To escape everything and be in my dreams which are kinda better, hence why alot of y'all likely haven't seen/heard from me lately, I apologise but yeah... I don't even have motivation to play a fucking video game, I turn it on and just kinda sit there and have no will to do anything... Last few drawing's have been a just me FORCING myself through which I hate doing as it's uncomfortable.
On drawing, after I finish (at some point) these requests I have, I can't do more, I can't. I can't go through the time and stress of doing pics (especially when back in college) without something more than a thankyou, but since no one likes my work enough to commission me, it just kinda leads me into what the hell to do.
Streaming also has been hit by all this too, when I DO stream, it just makes worse cause usually only like 1 or 2 people arrive, which is fine but it still internally hits me, of course these two things are also affected by the fact me (and my rl family) are struggling with just weekly groceries so financially, we are NOT good... Hell, I can't even afford batteries for my xbox controller so once the pair in it now go, that's it.
I have thought about gofundme and such but I refuse to be that kinda guy (yet)... But with how things are going, likely will get to that point, even if it'll likely fly as good as commissions and streaming, which is no.
I don't care if this sounds ranty or all cry-y but had to get it out, tired of literally crying and holding it in, I'm going to sleep (again) now as I said I do often.
Hope people have a goodnight.
Also goodnight.
Dude... Don't lose what is motivating you to do what are you doing, all you need is some time, you have a lot of pressure in your end, just try to focus on your duties, and try to find some time for you, college can absorb lots of time and make you feel frustrated, but stay strong, and don't forget what you are fighting for
Maybe some of this people are giving you lots of pressure, including myself, and I apologize, is better a sincere apology from a friend than stay falling in the same mistakes, but try to do your best whenever you can, every effort you do counts, the most important thing is your studies
You have people who cares for you and they understand what you are going through including Jason and myself, no matter what, but never give up, and don't pressure yourself too much, it can hurt you too much
I'm here for you for everything you need, because you are important to me as I said thousands of times, and remember stay strong no matter what and follow your dreams, I know maybe there are times you can't go forward, but you are doing your hardest and very few people can go where are you going through, so please don't lose hope
I want to help, I really want to help, so I have a question
May I advertise you so you can get the money please?