My Dad died today.
7 years ago
Buy me a ko-fi and fuel more personal art!
JOURNAL STARTS HERE This morning my dad died.
We were all with him when it happened. He seemed to have held on until me and my brother arrived. It wasn't long after we got there that he went. He was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer just two months ago. It was extremely aggressive. He'd also been struggling with pain we assume was from it, for around 7 months before it was finally picked up on after being taken into A&E.
Everyone's offered for me to stay with them but I just want to be at home, even though it's difficult because I lived with Dad and now he will never be here again.
I feel sick.
I'll still be doing my best to work on commissions (I'll need the distraction), though things my be a bit slow.
I've also cancelled my recent YCH for now because of this.
I hope everyone is having a better day than me.
If you want to, please tell me something good that happened to you recently! I'd like to see that the world isn't all dark right now.
We were all with him when it happened. He seemed to have held on until me and my brother arrived. It wasn't long after we got there that he went. He was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer just two months ago. It was extremely aggressive. He'd also been struggling with pain we assume was from it, for around 7 months before it was finally picked up on after being taken into A&E.
Everyone's offered for me to stay with them but I just want to be at home, even though it's difficult because I lived with Dad and now he will never be here again.
I feel sick.
I'll still be doing my best to work on commissions (I'll need the distraction), though things my be a bit slow.
I've also cancelled my recent YCH for now because of this.
I hope everyone is having a better day than me.
If you want to, please tell me something good that happened to you recently! I'd like to see that the world isn't all dark right now.
FA+


My hoodie arrived, and i love it!.. and i have a wedding to attend to soon :)
As for good things happening to me. I managed to overcome some differences with people of my past, and things have been doing wonderful. I'm on the other side of a dark cloud and it's feeling wonderful. I'm finally getting back into the wave of art, and finding inspiration again. I feel like I've finally overcome depression which is a very nice thing, there's still some adjusting to be done, but it's alright, it's not so bad at all. ^w^!
Take your time, don't rush yourself, focus on you and if you ever need someone to listen, or just talk because I went through a similar experience already with losing my own father to the same C word you lost your father too. Just, I know I don't know you well, but I do admire you as an artist, is all.
theres nothig i can thik of to say but keep strong. your father may be gon in body but hes always there in your heart and memories. in that seance hes never treuly gone. it hurts.. i know.. it probably wont stop for a long time. just remember that your not alone, we are here for you and dont be afraid to reach out to any of us
Since you also wanted to know happy events, well, right now I'm patching things up with my parents. There was a pretty big argument in the house a few weeks ago, but no matter what they still want to support me in the end. It wasnt easy, but now things are looking better. "Step by step" as they say I guess ^^ and you: deal with your things one step at a time, as well
It seems just yesterday that my mom passed from lung cancer, even though it was last year. Weirder still is how it feels to go home, because that's when I remember it the most. Living away from my parents, it hits you a bit differently I suppose.
If you need a good bit of news, maybe this will help. Last night I got some bad news about me extending out here for a few more weeks on deployment, which would have resulted in missing Anthrocon and all the investment in booking things would have gone to waste. However, it looks like they realized I had leave approved already and have reversed their decision... I'm happy to go back home ^^;
Love and memories will always let him be there with you. Iβm sorry for your loss.
Let me see good thing that's happened to me... I got weight loss surgery almost 2 weeks ago! I'm down 29lbs so far and dropping fast! Also got out of my horrible delivery job into a better paying one, with nicer people!
As for a nice thing, I recently got engaged to my Girlfriend of 5 years. My dad approved of her before he passed away, so being able to do that and make her smile has been awesome. I also recently moved out, got into an apartment with friends that are as close as family, and everything has been going about as well as it can go for being out on your own the first time.
You are strong for being able to know that you want to be happy during this, but remember the folks around you that want to support you during this time, and allow them to help you. You'll be much better off for it, I promise. You'll also probably feel a bit shocked and maybe a bit numb, and for now that's okay. <3 Be well.
As for the good thing...it's good and bad? I suffer from pretty severe depression which can often make it hard for me to care for myself. I finally broke down and brushed my hair the other day after not having brushed it for the better part of a week. It took an hour and a half and I broke the hairbrush from hitting it on my computer desk (it's a whole fucking thing, my mom used to hit me with the brush when I would cry out when she was brushing my hair, so it kind of got ingrained in me and I started smacking myself in the head instead of crying...fun fact: that's not fucking normal) so I felt really shitty.
My wife told her brother what happened and he bought us all dinner from one of my favorite places to make up for it.
As for something happy to share with you, my long distance partner recently visited and lived with us for a week and it was the best experience of my life!- Had fun walks on the beach with our dog and explored all kinds of pretty places here in Nova Scotia! We had so many fun adventures. Some pretty scenery pics to look at if you wish :) -
https://tinyurl.com/yb3qmmyu
https://tinyurl.com/ya6etqbj
https://tinyurl.com/y9qqzn49
https://tinyurl.com/y7pr38sh
https://tinyurl.com/yc5us8bl
My grandparents are also enjoying a well deserved 2 week vacation in Hawaii with family that lives there and having so much fun and I'm really happy for them.
Lots of love your way
For some lighthearted stuff, we found a home for a dog that kept be sent back to the shelter, finally, and this one seems to have stuck. The poor doggo came from a horrible hoarding situation where a man abused him frequently, and so he was pretty male-aggressive and kept getting sent back, but he's now ended up with a nice girl who lives in a female-only house. Things have gotten better for him, and I hope things will be better for you and you find peace in your home again.
My life is pretty boring but a few highlights from recently:
- I'm finally the proud owner of a Dreamy! I won him in the latest FTO raffle sale ;v; https://toyhou.se/2307428.-
- I've placed in a few art raffles recently, that's always a nice little surprise
- I baked a cake for breakfast yesterday lmao
- It's Winter here atm and my sleep schedule's been backwards (so my "days" have been 9Β°C) but yesterday I managed to mostly fix it and spent pretty much the whole day just laying in the sunshine uwu
- Also every day I get to cuddle and play with our 4 baby girls (ratties~) and they brux away and chew holes in all my clothes
Something good that happened to me was I got to meet you and have lots of great times with you at CF. I hope we get to hang again soon... I want that ice skating trip with you for sure.
in with us to help him. Stage 3 kidney disease, accute renal failure due to the metal
in his spine and hips from a tri level spinal fusion. The metal over time deteriorates
and poisons you. He is strong willed and tough as nails, thankfully I got that from him heh.
I just wanted to say that I know it is hard now but you will come out of this
stronger than ever before. I almost died and the hospital was pretty sure my
husband was going to giving him only 30% chance. Our house burnt down
and he was trapped in there for 20 minutes.
Things like that are terrifying. Death hurts most definitely but it also gives you
a better understanding on how to view life. I promise you, YOU WILL BE OKAY.
Your family will too. It'll take a while to heal but trust me, continue living and
doing all the things your father was proud of since I dont think there is a better
way to honor someone so important.
As for commissions
DON'T
WORRY
ABOUT
THEM!
YOU need time to heal! You need rest! If people cannot give you time to
recover then that is not your problem. You take the time you need to recover.
Don't worry about what others think, the only thoughts that matter are your own.
My condolences, just take care of yourself okay? One day at a time. I wish you and your
family well in your time of recovering.
It's hard to take it a day at a time when I'm this stressed.