Recently I've broken a fever and it reminded me of the weird dreamlike experiences I used to have as a child when I had a fever. I still get this almost extrasensory experience occasionally, but I forget about it so quickly it always kind of surprises me when it comes back. So here's an attempt to describe it for myself (and maybe to others if it makes any sense at all). I used to call it the 'Hard and soft' for the lack of a better way of describing it.

It's incredibly abstract, so I'm not surprised if there isn't anyone that can wrap their head around this, but I'd love to hear if you have experienced somethign similar or other weird sensory fever dreams.

Imagine a tall rectangular block of clay, balanced atop of your hand on one of its ends. It doesn't sway because of gravity and there's no actual weight on your hand, it's just the feeling of the pressure of weight on your hand; it may be more weight than you could actually carry in one hand, but it doesn't push your hand down. Like clay it's pliant, but there's no cold or wetness, just the pressure and yielding of a mass sitting atop of your hand. It's also not really determined by gravity, you could just swivel your hand around all you want and the pressure would still be there.

Imagine it vibrating with a high frequency, yet low amplitude, like a high pitched buzz running through it. There's no sound and none of the vibrations actually channel through you, you can simply feel a very excited vibration from it.

Now imagine that pliant weight stiffening, gradually becoming more and more firm as if the whole block of clay is contracting into a thin broomhandle shape, poking down into your palm, still vibrating, concentrating the force of pressure into a tiny spot as it hardens fully. It's an undulating, gradual morphing, oscillating from the heavy wide spread soft buzzing, to a concentrated vibrating point, and then back again to softening and spreading out.

Finally, if you've been able to follow this far, imagine that all of these sensations are not actually imposing on your hand. You can feel them as IF they were on you, but there's no spot on your body that actually feels this. You can see it before your eyes oscillating and your brain registers the pressure, vibration and consistency, but it's not located on your body. You simply feel it outside of your body, somewhere before you, over and over, keeping you from sleeping or waking up, just swelling, contracting, spreading, squeezing.

Sometimes I guess my brain would try to make sense of these sensations and I would hallucinate about people rhythmically pushing something into me, but usually I just saw patterns morphing into other patterns over and over.