...been there

know the feel

well at least I know now I am not the only one

... Don't let anyone push you around. You are a person, not a tool or a machine. If people are giving you empty promises than they can go screw off. You just need to worry about you. You don't need anyone to you who you are or what to do. Heck, I'm not telling you what to do... Just be your own person and life will be fine. I'm glad that you posted this to let people know that you cant take stupidity and greed from other people.

its not that i get pushed around, I am just way to nice and forgiving, thinking about the other first then me.
yeah sometimes a rage post willl help clear the mind and warn other about the mistake i made

Jesus...Well those people can fuck off with their fake promises. I

yeah indeed, well most of those fake fuckers are no longer in my life

Yeah, the kind of person who makes fake promised suck

yeah even when there pic was a gift, suddenly they dont feel the need to give something back

Yeah, it is just proof that people can be self centred assholes who don't care about others

yeah and this behavure is specially fueled by the social media

Yep

Holy cow, this isn't all because of me is it? I'm sorry...
It's really been three years? Damn. I could go on saying how busy and stressful life has been, but your right, that's a really lame excuse.
I guess the real reason is I'm just severely bad at procrastination, mostly because I'm afraid I'll somehow mess up, or do a shitty job. And unfortunately I do tend to do this every time I owe art. I guess I'm just being a shitty artist by using the excuse of being a shitty artist. Sorry.

I do feel bad about this, and I'll try to light a fire under my ass to get that pic done today.
And I said I'd do a second pic for you, of Gulp from Spyro. (didn't forget) I'll still do it. I just need a refresher of exactly what you wanted with that one.

Sorry again for being a shitty artist, and a shitty friend...

No not all, just recent chain of events and let downs caused this.

but why do you accept trades then?
And don't show any step by step progress you made, I hear nothing from you I see nothing,
I keep my trades updated about the state its in, and also with my commissions.

and when I say I like it, just finish it, no need to think its shitty and cause stress.

I been a patient friend, but making me wait so long for a drawing its just insane, it kinda lost my trust in you man.
If it took you 3 years to draw this then I must get a 1,30 hour cartoon of it, lol.

The reply i send in the note will explain what I want in the other pic.

Well, I guess it's because I want to become a good artist, and I did feel confident at the time, but then I get nervous...

As for communication, I'm just bad at that in general to be honest. I haven't really been communicating much with anyone, aside from a little comment here and there. Hell, I don't even talk to my own family (although with that, it's because they generally treat me like shit). And with the progress of the pic... well, there actually hasn't been any since I did the ink sadly. But I'll get on it today, and try to slap some color on it! I'll try with those new markers.

well to become a good artist you must ask for feedback, and ask for critics.
( yeah family is shit)
and why don;t you try to go digital? its so much easyer, and you dont have to buy markers =3

Yeah, digital is definitely an easier, and cheaper alternative. Though I think I was having some trouble getting my tablet to work correctly last time... But I'll give it a shot. Heck, what's the worst that can happen?

your tablet having a will of its own, infecting your computer, used his AI to use your body as a puppet and make so a network of super computers destroying menkind?

Yeah, something like that... so I gave it some chocolate, seemed to work for a while.
Anyway, look at this!

I am very sorry you have to put up with this shit, if it helps I have alot of shit I have to put up with and occassionaly have a massive rant about.

So in regards to trades, I know people who have that same problem, and I personaly feel that trades are such an easy thing for people to take advantage of so best just stick to requests or commissions but it really is such a dick move for people to just not uphold their end of the deal.

In regards to extremely slow/late replies, I am totally with you, i really hate messaging someone and then waiting hours or days for a response, i always end up feeling that a simple "I am busy, talk with you later" or something is just a few seconds of their time, and many hours of stress off my mind. I can sometimes be slow as my notifications don;t always pop up but i check Discord somewhat regularly so i try to stay onto of it.

And I am VERY familiar with people only wanting to talk to you because of what you do, and not give a shit about who you are. can;t count how many people have tried to get to know me only because of my art ideas, and only ever want to talk about that and keep suggesting things I should do and be rather bitchy about it when I say I like coming up with things myself and doing my own thing. it really does feel sometimes like people just have this "dance monkey dance!" attitude towards people like me and you that make contributions on this site and it really does drain me and is a massive cause as to why i don;t post as much as i used to, i still get a lot of stuff just keep it too myself, I have low self esteem and worth, and having people treat me like my only worth is me buying art really doesn;t help, so i get you, i really do.

and the final thing with you telling people they can use your characters and ideas, think when we had just gotten to know each other you said i could use your characters, and i probably said to you what I say to everyone (probably) which is that i don;t really like using other peoples characters in my ideas as I both feel a bit off using others things and i personaly just feel i am getting someone free art, and i am of the mindset of treating something like that as a trade of sorts. so do hope that hasn;t stuck with you when it happened (if it even did my memory is ass sometimes)

but really sorry to hear you aren;t happy, hit me up on discord if you need someone to chat too

this shit keeps happening for a very long time now, specially when I just started out doing art.

Trades and request are just ways to get free stuff as you said, but with me loosing my shit I got my stuff done from 1 person.
So i am gonna think twice before i trade with someone.

Yeah you told me about it, you spend your money and you should get what you want, not them, because people are cheap and dont like spending things themselves if they can get what they want for free.

No what I mean is, I am gonna make 3d models now, or I hope to make them, people can just download them and use them in stuff, but i get insta rejected on that idea... and that pisses me off.

we will talk soon

Jeez, I'm so sorry.

This is probably a good time to apologize for a few years ago. I wasn't a great friend, or even a friend at all. I was young and stressed out, kind of stupid honestly. Stressed out with school, a really bad relationship, I was just in a really bad place in my life. I've wanted to apologize for a long time now, but I guess I've been scared. Though, whether you accept it or not, you still deserve one, so I'm really sorry. I got really cold with you years ago. I want to think I'm doing better now and would love to try again so I can be a better friend, but that's entirely up to you. I hope I can make it up to you somehow.

I hope its not an apology I earn now just because I grew as an artist, and make interactive art now.

What I do remember is that we had some fun rp going on even that I suppressed the bad memories, and that I even drew for you, but never wanted to finish because of events that happen between us.

But yeah, I forgive you and will give you a second chance, but you have to prove yourself to me, ok?

It's an apology because you deserve one after the way I acted. I like to think I've grown up since then and want to make it right. Artist or not, you deserve that sort of respect just like anybody else. I hope I can be the kind of friend you deserve, so thank you for giving me a second chance. I'll try my best.

ok budd, just come and talk to me when you want too

*hugs*