if I seem out of it lately, everyone, just know I'm going through a rough patch. it's nothing new. same old story, same old song and dance. just different characters this time. I ... don't know what to do or how to just get by. it's like I'm not allowed to just exist. leastways not without people hating my guts and wanting to tear me down.

some would say it's just my karma. but I dunno what I did to deserve this. I keep to myself. I don't speak up except in defense of people. I just wanna live and be happy like anyone else. I'm compassionate. I go out of my way to help others.

apparently I'm supposed to be quiet and invisible. just being noticed at all has always painted a target on my back. how dare I exist! how dare I tell someone when they are hurting others. how dare I let other people know there's someone unsafe out there. guess that makes me a harasser. makes me toxic.

yeah, I'm crying. I cry alot. I'll get through this, somehow. I dunno how, but I always do.