Lost control
7 years ago
I lost control grabbed my cell phone and just threw it 200 foot.... screen broke sooo then I just smashed it and tore it in half Got into a screaming argument with pops and I wore myself down into nothing...
I was working going bonkers already having a bad day and he decided to drag home another truck load of junk some massive air compressor we have no place for.... soo it'll be rotting in the sand.... He called me then hung up after making me more mad and I just without a second thought just flung my phone across the yard. Damn near an acre. I was a fool to think it'd work after that but I certainly regretted it.
been slumped in bed with my boots on. I also ripped my hoodie into shreds. Am sure I have an extra but I rather just be cold.
I'm so miserable but I guess as long as everyone else is happy then I suppose it doesn't matter.
Kinda wish I'd cease to exist...
I'm sooo ill equip to leave here its ridiculous no job opportunities or financial dependence And without a phone I have even less.
I'm just foolish and nobody likes me especially now.
its fine I guess pops can break his phone leave it on the back of the truck let it get ran over then he can leave his replacement phone outside on the back of a truck without a care... and I have to carry my phone everyday on my person encase he calls. case he needs help... I have to drop what I'm doing again and again and again for him when ever he needs something but I don't get the same sort of deal. It doesn't work the same way. When I need help he doesn't drop what he's doing to help me we don't have that luxury.
Then I get called lazy and good for nothing in oh so many words... I only worked 4 hours today or something of the like. Well yeah 4 hours tearing apart fiberglass laced air conditioners isn't exactly a smooth process... Its a load of crap.
I miss my cat she got eaten weeks ago by the stray dogs or coyotes am frustrated on a few levels for that. pops can spend 4000$ on something for him self have it shipped across the united states... have no space in the house to put it when it comes and thats fine and dandy but a few hundred dollars on chain link to enclose the yard or a few hundred on pouring a concrete pad or whatever is just unreasonable expenses... fuck if I know... normally I'd talk to the cat since I don't have any friends to go talk to IRL... everyone says move out but ya know its easier said than done when you're sooo far integrated in things here. its fine for other people to say those things they're already set in their ways. If I could have moved I probably would have.
To surmise today I have less than what I started with.
but folks probably wont read anyof this anyways. why would they? Who are they to care.
I was working going bonkers already having a bad day and he decided to drag home another truck load of junk some massive air compressor we have no place for.... soo it'll be rotting in the sand.... He called me then hung up after making me more mad and I just without a second thought just flung my phone across the yard. Damn near an acre. I was a fool to think it'd work after that but I certainly regretted it.
been slumped in bed with my boots on. I also ripped my hoodie into shreds. Am sure I have an extra but I rather just be cold.
I'm so miserable but I guess as long as everyone else is happy then I suppose it doesn't matter.
Kinda wish I'd cease to exist...
I'm sooo ill equip to leave here its ridiculous no job opportunities or financial dependence And without a phone I have even less.
I'm just foolish and nobody likes me especially now.
its fine I guess pops can break his phone leave it on the back of the truck let it get ran over then he can leave his replacement phone outside on the back of a truck without a care... and I have to carry my phone everyday on my person encase he calls. case he needs help... I have to drop what I'm doing again and again and again for him when ever he needs something but I don't get the same sort of deal. It doesn't work the same way. When I need help he doesn't drop what he's doing to help me we don't have that luxury.
Then I get called lazy and good for nothing in oh so many words... I only worked 4 hours today or something of the like. Well yeah 4 hours tearing apart fiberglass laced air conditioners isn't exactly a smooth process... Its a load of crap.
I miss my cat she got eaten weeks ago by the stray dogs or coyotes am frustrated on a few levels for that. pops can spend 4000$ on something for him self have it shipped across the united states... have no space in the house to put it when it comes and thats fine and dandy but a few hundred dollars on chain link to enclose the yard or a few hundred on pouring a concrete pad or whatever is just unreasonable expenses... fuck if I know... normally I'd talk to the cat since I don't have any friends to go talk to IRL... everyone says move out but ya know its easier said than done when you're sooo far integrated in things here. its fine for other people to say those things they're already set in their ways. If I could have moved I probably would have.
To surmise today I have less than what I started with.
but folks probably wont read anyof this anyways. why would they? Who are they to care.
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