UPDATE: I've been told this was not suicide, the officials are ruling it as an accident based on what they've found.


I wished I would never have to make a journal like this; especially since it concerns someone that not only I've considered a loyal friend for over ten years, but the same person that helped me come out as a fur.

  pixik was his name, you most likely know him for his sfm work under a pseudonym he used for a while: fruitymilk. This morning, I've received a message from a few of his other friends that he had taken his own life. I don't know when, how or even why he did it, but the only thing that is certain is that he's no longer with us. Not one person he'd been in contact with, not even his ex (who he was on great terms with) ever noticed any change in behavior.

I've known him for way longer than that when we played on a small darkrp community server. We've really hit it off from there, and we'd play all sorts of video games together. Sometimes it went as far into the small hours of the next morning, even though we had stuff to do the next day. He always had that personality that would brighten anyone up, he would come out with the funniest things I've ever heard.

In 2015 I decided I needed to get away for a few weeks, and I went to where he lived in a small town called Ruabon, just outside Wrexham in Wales. It was the first time either of us met someone from the internet, so it was a brilliant first experience. Later that year he came over to spend a couple weeks at my place to see everything that was here in Ipswich. When I left my phone unlocked to go to the bathroom and left it on an image on here, that's when he found out I loved furry art as well.

He would be the person I'd talk to about this for the next few years, and he always encouraged me to not hold whatever I have to my chest and just go it and share it, and soon I did. All I had to go on was the name I always used On-line, and a general idea that he'd be a rabbit. I asked his ex-girlfriend to draw a concept and lo and behold, Warren was born...

In the years that followed we'd go on a few more holidays, this time renting a beautiful cabin out in the woods to stay for a fortnight. Staying there with him will always be the among the favorite memories I have of him. Next year I was going to ask him to come down again so he could see all the new additions to the town... And now I'll never get that chance...


Pixik... Liam...
I hope you find peace wherever you are now...