Another day and I wanna give up again
6 years ago
Blah blah same as always, I'm depressed, anxious, I feel exhausted, I'm fcking poor, this country sucks, it's too hard to get a job and it's even harder to get a job that pays decently, so much so that commissions are my best option possible.
My father stopped helping us and not I need to make 33% more what I make every month and I just cant. i had to spend all money I was saving.
no money for emergencies. of any kind. no medical insurance. no medical plan. nothing. zero. that money is gone. and next money i wont have that. we just wont pay some bills.
if we dont pay rent we're out. if we dont pay the electricity bill I cant work. we're done. same for the internet bill. so what are we supposed to do? starve?
this is too much for me. i wanna die so fucking bad. this life is pure hell. i've been through this for way too long and not it only got worse. how am i supposed to do this
My father stopped helping us and not I need to make 33% more what I make every month and I just cant. i had to spend all money I was saving.
no money for emergencies. of any kind. no medical insurance. no medical plan. nothing. zero. that money is gone. and next money i wont have that. we just wont pay some bills.
if we dont pay rent we're out. if we dont pay the electricity bill I cant work. we're done. same for the internet bill. so what are we supposed to do? starve?
this is too much for me. i wanna die so fucking bad. this life is pure hell. i've been through this for way too long and not it only got worse. how am i supposed to do this
Lets face it, your going through a rough time and you need to utilise any and all options you can. Commissions are certainly one option!
Here's some more;
1.) A fundraiser. Let people know that your going through it rough, and that...quite frankly? You need some help!
2.) Regarding commissions, perhaps take on works you usually wouldnt. Not to sound cold but you cant afford not to. So if someone wants to commission you for something you usually wouldnt do? Perhaps consider doing it. If there are concerns regarding quality of such works? Inform the customer immediately of that and let them decide. If someone see's your struggling financially and does commission you and you reject it because of that? Someone could easily just as well think 'well he clearly doesnt need or want my money then' and that leaves you no better off than you were before. (I realize that sounds opportunistic especially coming from me but this is something you'll need to look into!). Of course this has its downsides too, i admit. So if you do take this approach, ensure your customer is aware of things/etc...
3.) Sell anything you dont use anymore. Got some old figurine? Or maybe some old junk PC parts? Sell sell sell!
4.) Small, odd-jobs! Got a neighbor who needs their lawn mowed? or car washed? Offer to do it for a small fee! Some will be glad that such menial tasks are taken off their hands and will happily pay!
Hope this helps in some way! I know some of it sounds cold...the world can indeed be a bitch sometimes. But keep your head high! Things will improve!
just a couple things though:
1. i already ask for money on twitter and tumblr. i have a ko-fi page people can donate to. i talk about my situation. i'm already trying that. i dont get much help bc i'm not popular and most people arent in a good situation either
2. i actually get enough commissions that i never really run out of them. i only refuse commissions that are so big i wouldnt be able to manage well (once i got commissioned to draw 10 characters and it took me half a month, so the money wasnt worth the effort), difficult commissions make me really anxious, or commissions that require me skills I'm not good at. In these cases not only I'd take longer to finish them (thus making less money considering the amount of time i spent on it), the commissioner would be paying for something not well made since I dont quite have the skills for it. Not only that, i'd need to stop taking commissions for a while so the next commissioner didnt have to wait for a month more than they'd usually have to. So i'd need to stop commissions for a while just to take care of it, if it's a giant sized commission
Of course if i wasnt getting enough commissions then i'd be more open to accepting others. So it's not a matter of not taking jobs when i need them
But the way it is now some commissions are unfeasible. like if someone wanted me to commission for pixel art when i dont have the skills for it and I have no time to learn to do it on the go.
So believe me, when i dont work on a commission it really is because it wouldnt be practical. and i would be really irresponsible towards myself AND the client if I were to take it. i know my limits and i know what kinda work wouldnt be worth for the client or for me.
3. i dont have anything to sell. i've been poor all my life and never bought anything like that. no action figures, game consoles, physical games in general, pc parts, bicycle, old monitors and stuff like that, none of that.
4. odd jobs here are expected to be so cheap that an hour of working on a commission literally pays 6x more than what i'd make in a part time job, for example. so working on commissions is my only viable option