I'm updating my journal to let people know how and where things are going and how close i am to finally changing for the better.

First i wanna say that after several months of applying i finally got an interview, and its this March. I wish it where sooner but if i can land a job then i will have a more stable income and will be able to afford my help most consistently and more importantly be able to work out refunds with other people who'm ive wronged in the past. I'm also looking to make my financial situation more stable by looking into Medicaid and food stamps.

Moving onto commissions: I know that about 5 months ago i posted an emergency commission journal to ask for help. i thought i would be able to provide the product consistently but as it turned out i wasn't as prepared as i thought. i ended up having to refund two parties money i didn't have and as of last night failed to provide a commission to another consumer, they are making a journal entry about it on their end. I wont name names, but if it all leads back to me, know that i understand that i messed up and im working to make sure he is refunded properly as well. that literally leaves on party left from that emergency commissioning and im making sure i pay extra attention to them from here on out. At this point i dont feel comfortable with myself taking commissions like this anymore. I still do have some friends who are willing to help me out if i draw for them. but if anyone else wants to commission me id rather just do the product first, or get to a point where the buyer feels comfortable before they pay for anything. Im trying to work on my customer service, and i know ive always done or said things that would be perceived as unprofessional. Know that im trying to pinpoint and improve apon these issues as i was giving much helpful advice from peers and clients alike.

EDIT: * I wanted to make special mention that in an effort to improve and ive been reluctant to admit this in the past, but ive literally uninstalled one of the major thing that was distracting me which was League of Legends. Ive been using it as as a stress reliever, but that game is more a less a spiritual cancer to me. I love it, sure, but it was really clouding my judgement and im not in the place to be devoting the time i have been into it. People say i put time into it that i could have on commissions, and they are right. so i got rid of it untill i finally make myself more stable.*

As for other owed commissions i am working with some friends to make sure that the pictures are of high quality and not rushed. I understand that part of the reason for my poor speed and poor quality is cause of HOW i draw my picture and how it basically has no structure, and i end up taking even longer to work on pictures by redrawing and re-finalizing parts of the picture. Ill be uploading some of these commissions over the next few weeks.


This being said i know that i could still be doing a better job at changing, its not an instant process and other peoples opinions matter. If anyone has something they want to point out to me then please dont be afraid to tell me. Ill listen and continue to work harder to fix my stigma around here.