FA+
Shop
I don't know what to title this so just going to say goodbye
6 years ago
Um just going to make this last post ever about how I am, I will say I have reached a new level of depression I did not know was possible um to the point where I can be seen as danger to myself. I am not happy I must admit, the fandom used to be my place to escape but it's became a place where I realize I don't matter and can't overcome the obstacles I'm dealing with in my life. I just recently had to overcome getting bullied for my weak stature where I got picked on especially with my speech.
I dont even know how to fully express the events that have happened but all my turmoil is based off two things.
Money and people/relationships. It's these two factors that I feel like a complete failure in. That and my so called friendships with people. Im giving in finally
This year alone has been the worst. I've lost so many friends, so many jobs, and so much money down the drain.
I'm just defeated, broken. Not only that but I'm just living off plan B since I'm barely managing to stay above water.
I kept asking myself when's it all going to change, is it never? I'm too the point where I'm tired of trying to keep living so hard with putting myself out there and the more I try the more I fail falling even deeper into hopelessness and left to pick myself up over and over...there's so much wreckage burdening me eating me up inside. If I try reaching out for help, i end up pushing people away or viewed in a different negative view. So i bottle it in and whenever something dramatic happens, I break.
Everything revolves around money to function, live, and be satisfied but I can never be satisfied. No matter how much work I do and slave over, I can't save up to get out of the terrible living situation with my family. Especially when I get threatened to be kicked out and had two jobs just to attempt saving up, but the money being leeched off to my family. I can never get ahead.
I no longer feel as if I matter or if anyone cares about how much I constantly struggle day in and out. I cant keep trying to overcome any longer just to fail over and over again. I'm numb and defeated. I'm no longer myself.
Um I honestly hate typing these things out though, its something I need to say though.
All I will say is I am leaving disappearing poofing gone
I dont really think anyone will care that much or notice that I'm gone or disappeared.
So all my projects I wanted and aspirations are dead in the water. Including my character on here. it will be no more croc. It's the end.
I am thankful for the people I met who truly I cherished.
I dont know um i guess this is it, bye bye
I dont even know how to fully express the events that have happened but all my turmoil is based off two things.
Money and people/relationships. It's these two factors that I feel like a complete failure in. That and my so called friendships with people. Im giving in finally
This year alone has been the worst. I've lost so many friends, so many jobs, and so much money down the drain.
I'm just defeated, broken. Not only that but I'm just living off plan B since I'm barely managing to stay above water.
I kept asking myself when's it all going to change, is it never? I'm too the point where I'm tired of trying to keep living so hard with putting myself out there and the more I try the more I fail falling even deeper into hopelessness and left to pick myself up over and over...there's so much wreckage burdening me eating me up inside. If I try reaching out for help, i end up pushing people away or viewed in a different negative view. So i bottle it in and whenever something dramatic happens, I break.
Everything revolves around money to function, live, and be satisfied but I can never be satisfied. No matter how much work I do and slave over, I can't save up to get out of the terrible living situation with my family. Especially when I get threatened to be kicked out and had two jobs just to attempt saving up, but the money being leeched off to my family. I can never get ahead.
I no longer feel as if I matter or if anyone cares about how much I constantly struggle day in and out. I cant keep trying to overcome any longer just to fail over and over again. I'm numb and defeated. I'm no longer myself.
Um I honestly hate typing these things out though, its something I need to say though.
All I will say is I am leaving disappearing poofing gone
I dont really think anyone will care that much or notice that I'm gone or disappeared.
So all my projects I wanted and aspirations are dead in the water. Including my character on here. it will be no more croc. It's the end.
I am thankful for the people I met who truly I cherished.
I dont know um i guess this is it, bye bye
I am sorry I could not help you out more. I was really surprised to see you go on Telegram this morning. I...I dunno what else to say now, except how sorry I feel for you, having to go through so much shit, and that I wished I was able to help you out more in some ways.
Just...stay safe man. And if you stil wanna chat or talk or anything, you can poke me here or on Telegram, man.
Be safe.
You know that I care for ya bud. I'm gonna be here as long as ya need.
I want you to open comminivations with me so i can express how much you matter to me personally.
They are alot of stuck up people in this fandom. I have met my fair share.
Dont let them ruin you.
Block them and connect with the people that show u the love.
My telegram group are all worried about you and even if u just create a new telegram to hang out with us. You will be welcome. Always
Please contact with me.
Miss you
Love Jack
I care about you alot and worry for you, still... If this can make you feel better, I'll stand by it, I just really will miss you.
Please be careful out there and when/if you do come back and see this, me and others DO love ya and care, we are here for you always.
Take care of yourself. I think you'd be missed by many more folks than you believe right now.
Sincerely,
The Cheshire Cat's Master
This is a problem only a credible doctor or professional therapist can help you with.
If you do feel yourself a threat to indeed yourself, best to get off the internet and seek some help.
Have a friend or family member take you in to see someone, if you yourself cannot do so on your own.
No amount of sugar coated snuggle-kisses from furries can help.
Seek a doctor or a therapist, that is what you need to do.
If not, things can only get worse for yourself.