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Some Very Important News! (PLEASE READ!)
6 years ago
So meny lovely dragons out there and so little time to see them all.
Hey guys! It's me again, and....I've got some pretty heavy news. I'm gunna try my best to explain everything and try to make as much sense as possible. So if you want, you can try and read my ramblings and see if you can understand, if not, that's fine. I'll have a TLDR line at the end to help me some everything up.
Ok, so to start off, this past Monday, my hubby found out his little sister (about 16 years old) is showing some rather intense symptoms of MS, or Multiple Sclerosis. For those of you who dont know what that is, basically it effects a person's body making them black out for hours. It has other symptoms, but because of this, people with MS typically can't drive or play sports. (His sister just got her driver's license and she loved playing sports. But....now neither of those are possible for her at this point.)
His mother and sister live a full town away from where she goes to school, and since she can have one of her attacks at any moment without warning, they need a safe place for her to rest that's in between the school and their house. That's....where me and my hubby come in....
Our house isn't too far from the school, so, the room where my Art Room currently sits, will have to be moved to another room in the house, so we can make a spare room for his sister to stay in if she has another dizzy spell. But, if that where all that's been going on, I wouldn't be making this post right now.
This part is where things get a bit confusing.
It may or may not happen, but it doesn't matter at this point. Basically, since the house I'm living in is in his parents name, I have no say in what happens in this house. (I can't even hang up pictures or use thumbtacks and nails on the walls because they say it will "ruin" the walls.) Hell, they could even throw me out and let my hubby keep living here they so chose. For the longest time, I've been living with this constant fear! A fear that one day, with no warning, the house I'm living in will be ripped out from underneath me. And there's nothing I can do about it.
And yesterday, my fear came true. Not long after we got the news from him mom about his sister, we where told that his mom is putting our house up for sell again. They tried to do it once before, but changed their minds. But, their doing it again. And this time, they say its because it's too much work for my hubby. (You see, our house was built back in the 50's and when they first bought this place, it needed renovations, so they hired a contractor who ended up screwing them over and just running with the money. So this place still needs a lot of work.) We dont NEARLY have the money to buy this place or put a down payment on it. And since this place needs a ton of renovations, since not worth the huge investment to keep trying to fix. Giving how much me and my hubby work, we hardly have the time.
So, if the house sells (which it will take about 3 months for it to get on the market) me and my hubby will have to go and live in his grandmother's old house. Where me and him would be living in a garage that's about the size of a small trailer house, with his mom and sister. (They'll be living in a separate part of the house.)
Because of all this shit, my brain is in an absolute state of panic, anger, and sadness. And I'm not gunna lie you guys, I'm starting to wonder if any of it is worth it. I hate sitting in a chair at my house for an hour and wondering if I'll even be able to sit in the same chair 6 months from now! I don't like this at all! I feel trapped! And worst part is not knowing! I literally wont know anything about the house selling untill after Christmas! And until then, I'm basically gunna be walking on pins and needles!
I dont ask for much in this world. I just want a place for myself, a place to call home, a place where I wont be bothered, a place I could die peacefully in my old age.
Currently, the only thing I can do, is prepare. Me and my hubby are gunna start putting money away in a savings account (about 100 every paycheck, maybe more.) In preparation to get our own place. We have friends at work and outside work helping us find a house. But even if we find one, we can't buy it if we don't have the money. And even if we get the money, we may not be able to buy it if someone gets it first.
I'm tired, I'm scared, and I'm starting to get sick of it!
But, I'm gunna try my best. For now, it's all I can do.
And so, it brings me to why I'm telling you guys this.
If it wasn't already obvious by now, all of this has me incredibly irritated and exhausted. So much so that I'm not sure of I'll be able to draw anything worth much. If at all. (Especially if we keep moving my equipment.) And for this same reason, I'm gunna be a little quite for a while. I may poke my head out every now and then, but for the most part, I'm gunna be a ghost on social media. And I'll try to Update when I can. And to my friends who I do have the ability to speak directly to, I'll try my best to talk more. But again...I'm not feeling my best right now.
I typically dont vent much about my problems, because I'm of the mindset that others have problems, that are just as bad if not worse then mine. And I can understand it can be a bit annoying if not obnoxious if someone is always bitching about problems they're having and they do nothing about it. So, I rarely share my problems. But... this is some big shit for me, and I just wanna let you guys know that I'm still alive.
I still have some leftover art that I need to finish, but after that, I'm not sure how my art output is gunna be. I know it will be a long while before i ever open commissions or do art of others, since again, I'm not sure how stable my work environment will be. If this ruins your image of me, or makes you not wanna watch me anymore, that's perfectly fine. Honestly it shows more about yourself then it does me. And I don't wanna surround myself with others who will only support me when I'm pretending to be fine. I wanna have people who will be there to support me when I'm feeling like I'm at my lowest. I really hate saying these things, since it seems like I'm gaining so meny more supporters as of late, but, if I can't be honest, then I'm not sure if I deserve that kind of support.
And with that being said, here's my TLDR!
I'm in an unstable situation. And I'm currently trying to get myself into a better one! So I'm probably not gunna be around for a bit.
BE RESPECTFUL IN THE COMMENTS! Right now, I'm in a state where I need to think about me, and I swear to God, if someone comes at me with this, "Oh I have it worse!" Or "Grow up!" Shit! Then you'll be blocked. Plain and simple. I'm not gunna tolerate people being insensitive to the situations of others. Yeah you might have it tougher then me. But it's not a contest dipshit! Sorry about your situation, but it doesn't mine any better or worse! SHUT UP!
I'm gunna leave you guys with this final message, Please love one another. Be there for those who matter around you. And for those of you who read this whole thing, Thank you! Thank you from the very bottom of my heart!
VDragon Out!
Ok, so to start off, this past Monday, my hubby found out his little sister (about 16 years old) is showing some rather intense symptoms of MS, or Multiple Sclerosis. For those of you who dont know what that is, basically it effects a person's body making them black out for hours. It has other symptoms, but because of this, people with MS typically can't drive or play sports. (His sister just got her driver's license and she loved playing sports. But....now neither of those are possible for her at this point.)
His mother and sister live a full town away from where she goes to school, and since she can have one of her attacks at any moment without warning, they need a safe place for her to rest that's in between the school and their house. That's....where me and my hubby come in....
Our house isn't too far from the school, so, the room where my Art Room currently sits, will have to be moved to another room in the house, so we can make a spare room for his sister to stay in if she has another dizzy spell. But, if that where all that's been going on, I wouldn't be making this post right now.
This part is where things get a bit confusing.
It may or may not happen, but it doesn't matter at this point. Basically, since the house I'm living in is in his parents name, I have no say in what happens in this house. (I can't even hang up pictures or use thumbtacks and nails on the walls because they say it will "ruin" the walls.) Hell, they could even throw me out and let my hubby keep living here they so chose. For the longest time, I've been living with this constant fear! A fear that one day, with no warning, the house I'm living in will be ripped out from underneath me. And there's nothing I can do about it.
And yesterday, my fear came true. Not long after we got the news from him mom about his sister, we where told that his mom is putting our house up for sell again. They tried to do it once before, but changed their minds. But, their doing it again. And this time, they say its because it's too much work for my hubby. (You see, our house was built back in the 50's and when they first bought this place, it needed renovations, so they hired a contractor who ended up screwing them over and just running with the money. So this place still needs a lot of work.) We dont NEARLY have the money to buy this place or put a down payment on it. And since this place needs a ton of renovations, since not worth the huge investment to keep trying to fix. Giving how much me and my hubby work, we hardly have the time.
So, if the house sells (which it will take about 3 months for it to get on the market) me and my hubby will have to go and live in his grandmother's old house. Where me and him would be living in a garage that's about the size of a small trailer house, with his mom and sister. (They'll be living in a separate part of the house.)
Because of all this shit, my brain is in an absolute state of panic, anger, and sadness. And I'm not gunna lie you guys, I'm starting to wonder if any of it is worth it. I hate sitting in a chair at my house for an hour and wondering if I'll even be able to sit in the same chair 6 months from now! I don't like this at all! I feel trapped! And worst part is not knowing! I literally wont know anything about the house selling untill after Christmas! And until then, I'm basically gunna be walking on pins and needles!
I dont ask for much in this world. I just want a place for myself, a place to call home, a place where I wont be bothered, a place I could die peacefully in my old age.
Currently, the only thing I can do, is prepare. Me and my hubby are gunna start putting money away in a savings account (about 100 every paycheck, maybe more.) In preparation to get our own place. We have friends at work and outside work helping us find a house. But even if we find one, we can't buy it if we don't have the money. And even if we get the money, we may not be able to buy it if someone gets it first.
I'm tired, I'm scared, and I'm starting to get sick of it!
But, I'm gunna try my best. For now, it's all I can do.
And so, it brings me to why I'm telling you guys this.
If it wasn't already obvious by now, all of this has me incredibly irritated and exhausted. So much so that I'm not sure of I'll be able to draw anything worth much. If at all. (Especially if we keep moving my equipment.) And for this same reason, I'm gunna be a little quite for a while. I may poke my head out every now and then, but for the most part, I'm gunna be a ghost on social media. And I'll try to Update when I can. And to my friends who I do have the ability to speak directly to, I'll try my best to talk more. But again...I'm not feeling my best right now.
I typically dont vent much about my problems, because I'm of the mindset that others have problems, that are just as bad if not worse then mine. And I can understand it can be a bit annoying if not obnoxious if someone is always bitching about problems they're having and they do nothing about it. So, I rarely share my problems. But... this is some big shit for me, and I just wanna let you guys know that I'm still alive.
I still have some leftover art that I need to finish, but after that, I'm not sure how my art output is gunna be. I know it will be a long while before i ever open commissions or do art of others, since again, I'm not sure how stable my work environment will be. If this ruins your image of me, or makes you not wanna watch me anymore, that's perfectly fine. Honestly it shows more about yourself then it does me. And I don't wanna surround myself with others who will only support me when I'm pretending to be fine. I wanna have people who will be there to support me when I'm feeling like I'm at my lowest. I really hate saying these things, since it seems like I'm gaining so meny more supporters as of late, but, if I can't be honest, then I'm not sure if I deserve that kind of support.
And with that being said, here's my TLDR!
I'm in an unstable situation. And I'm currently trying to get myself into a better one! So I'm probably not gunna be around for a bit.
BE RESPECTFUL IN THE COMMENTS! Right now, I'm in a state where I need to think about me, and I swear to God, if someone comes at me with this, "Oh I have it worse!" Or "Grow up!" Shit! Then you'll be blocked. Plain and simple. I'm not gunna tolerate people being insensitive to the situations of others. Yeah you might have it tougher then me. But it's not a contest dipshit! Sorry about your situation, but it doesn't mine any better or worse! SHUT UP!
I'm gunna leave you guys with this final message, Please love one another. Be there for those who matter around you. And for those of you who read this whole thing, Thank you! Thank you from the very bottom of my heart!
VDragon Out!
