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A squirrel ate my truck.
6 years ago
General
So, instead of simply getting worse, my life decided to get weird.
Nearly two months ago my truck was rear-ended and the insurance company decided it was totaled and not worth repairing. There's damage to the bed, frame, cab, but otherwise it was completely drive-able. The bumper was crushed, but the tailgate and lights got off without a scratch.
There was also a squirrel living in the flower planter on my front porch. If I kicked the planter, it would sometimes pop out. I didn't want one of those living so close to the house in case it decided to move into the attic. It would run off around the front of the house and vanish somewhere. I thought about trapping it, but after disturbing it a few times it relocated
About three to four weeks ago, the electrical system in my truck started acting psychotic. Lights would flash on and off, then stay off. The airbag warning lights came on, and stayed on. The windshield wipers and spray system stopped working. I thought it might have been related to the accident, but all those systems seemed unaffected at the time. I thought perhaps a fuse had blown afterwards. I went through all the fuses on the cab fusebox, and they were fine. So I opened the hood, because I vaguely remembered a second fuse box there.
The entire engine was full of leaves. I found where that squirrel was vanishing to. I'm rather surprised that it didn't get caught up in the machine when I was driving around, that the truck still can drive around, and that all those leaves didn't spontaneously catch fire at some point despite being packed close to the engine. I cleaned the nest out, which, annoyingly, included foam from the cushions on the outdoor furniture in the back, which the squirrel also ripped apart. Anyhow, the thing had eaten and chewed through most of the wires and tubes on the left of the engine, anything that wasn't metal.
It's kind of a lot frustrating, because I'm not getting the money from insurance to repair the truck, and this adds even more on top. I'm still kind of fascinated that the TRUCK STILL RUNS despite so many compromised wires. It was sounding a little weird, but not, "half my tubes and wires are gone so shit is really fucked up" weird.
Really regret not buying that squirrel trap now, which was an impulse the first time I saw it pop out of the flower planter. Really regret not stopping to buy a comic even more, which would have avoided the whole rear-ending accident. Wishing the squirrels go fuck over someone else too. Like, c'mon Universe, really?
Nearly two months ago my truck was rear-ended and the insurance company decided it was totaled and not worth repairing. There's damage to the bed, frame, cab, but otherwise it was completely drive-able. The bumper was crushed, but the tailgate and lights got off without a scratch.
There was also a squirrel living in the flower planter on my front porch. If I kicked the planter, it would sometimes pop out. I didn't want one of those living so close to the house in case it decided to move into the attic. It would run off around the front of the house and vanish somewhere. I thought about trapping it, but after disturbing it a few times it relocated
About three to four weeks ago, the electrical system in my truck started acting psychotic. Lights would flash on and off, then stay off. The airbag warning lights came on, and stayed on. The windshield wipers and spray system stopped working. I thought it might have been related to the accident, but all those systems seemed unaffected at the time. I thought perhaps a fuse had blown afterwards. I went through all the fuses on the cab fusebox, and they were fine. So I opened the hood, because I vaguely remembered a second fuse box there.
The entire engine was full of leaves. I found where that squirrel was vanishing to. I'm rather surprised that it didn't get caught up in the machine when I was driving around, that the truck still can drive around, and that all those leaves didn't spontaneously catch fire at some point despite being packed close to the engine. I cleaned the nest out, which, annoyingly, included foam from the cushions on the outdoor furniture in the back, which the squirrel also ripped apart. Anyhow, the thing had eaten and chewed through most of the wires and tubes on the left of the engine, anything that wasn't metal.
It's kind of a lot frustrating, because I'm not getting the money from insurance to repair the truck, and this adds even more on top. I'm still kind of fascinated that the TRUCK STILL RUNS despite so many compromised wires. It was sounding a little weird, but not, "half my tubes and wires are gone so shit is really fucked up" weird.
Really regret not buying that squirrel trap now, which was an impulse the first time I saw it pop out of the flower planter. Really regret not stopping to buy a comic even more, which would have avoided the whole rear-ending accident. Wishing the squirrels go fuck over someone else too. Like, c'mon Universe, really?
You know how people say "Someday you'll look back on this and laugh?" It's been almost two decades since and I still want to set out poisoned peanuts for the fuzzy bastards.
Your Father Says, This Time it's Personal.
For me, it has been squirrels in the attic. My damned neighbors feed them -- they are trailer trash and live in modified mobile homes -- and they don't have attics. I have nailed hardware cloth over the attic vents and trapped the monsters with Havahart traps, transporting them five miles or more off the property.
I want a Havenoheart trap, but you have to keep sharpening the blades...
Brunswick Stew is a meat and root vegetable stew made from virtually any meat -- beef, mutton, pork, chicken, rabbit -- or squirrel. The first time I ever visited his home, he had a pot simmering on the stove, and waited until I was 3/4 of the way through the first bowl to tell me the meat was gray squirrels. I had another bowl, anyway. It was that good!
you take what you get, I guess. elderly people in germany know the term "roof rabbit", which was nothign more than an unfortunate cat turned stew... I guess after the war they ate everything that was edible.
"Rheinischer Sauerbraten" used to be horse meat, marinated in lots of vinegar and some spices to make the poor old marketenders horse meat edible again. nowadays it's usually beef. for some reasons horse meat is not too popular among germans... someone postulated it comes from horses being holy animals to the ancient germanic tribes.
My friend stopped eating wild meat after he got married for the second time, fearing it would gross out his new wife. She's also Native American, one of the Ohlone tribes from California. She found his old recipe book and started reading, and asked him why he never cooked his Squirrel Stew. Now she has four traps and a rack of feeding cages set up on their property. Their neighbors don't need to know!
here in middle europe they used to eat little birds like chiadees and redneck and whatnot. which are tiny once you went through the feathers. in northern italy they still trap them a lot, because tradition. the fact that they ruin wildlife to the extend that even in other countries to the north the population decreases, and thus they have to spray even more poison onto fields and trees, doesn't seem to matter. because tradition! :(
sometimes one expects a live bomb, really.
here in central europe we have more problems with mustelids we call house martens for them following the humans around and roaming foregardens and such at night. and then the night becomes cold they seek shelter under some warm engine hood. my old 70's ford usually gets overlooked, cools out too fast compared to modern rides. but after visiting friends not far away overnight the car wouldn't run right next day. turned out I was visited by a marten... first time in almost 30 years! good thing I had some wire with me to fix the munched spark wire. worked well for more than three months until I came around to replace it.
Never had car critters, just bats and birds finding nesting spaces against windows.