I've recently been doing some extra overthinking about sexuality and come to a place for the first time I feel comfortable enough actually putting words besides gay/queer to my experience.

I still consider myself that, but I also feel that it wouldn't be fair to ignore that I'm definitely acespec and arospec; I don't want to go deep into what made this all so hard for me, but I do want to thank my relationship with feelingchimpy for bringing me to a point where I can embrace it.

I specifically consider myself grey-ace and greyro!

For clarity, my personal definition for both of these terms isn't the "rarely experiences x attraction" way, but that grey-a identities serve to cover any non-allo experience that isn't the complete and certain lack of the appropriate attraction.

I exist without certainty of my attraction, without knowing what it is or how I experience it or if I do anyways, or whether or not it even matters if I do. And that's okay, and I can identify with that uncertainty and grey area itself, which is why I'm finally choosing to use and live with those terms.

Maybe my feelings will change, maybe I will come to know myself in a way that let's me use other words, but I don't know if I feel like I need to anymore. I am letting myself fully take on my experience for what it is and to let those feelings be the definition.

For me, this doesn't much change how I plan to go about things; I still want to define my relationships as individual things and let them happen in their own time, and maybe that's just part of it, to be fair!