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Computer update 12/28/2019/offering headshots for funds
6 years ago
General
Hello I thought I'd give a update on the computer situation for those who care/wish to know(for some reason nobody actually reads my journals, as evidence by 5+ people asking about their commissions with my last update journal on my page LOL. I mean I don't read stuff but have to go to my front page to note me, how do you NOT see the very obvious click-bait title journal? eh I digress)
Computer is still dead and at the repair guys place.
I thought I'd have it back by now but I'm told repair for this kind of thing generally takes a month(friend with exact same issue took this long as well). He says it looks hopeful but I won't hold my breathe until I can confirm I have my files back.
Speaking of which: I cannot work on previous bought commissions, otherwise I'd have started again. I do not have a computer that can draw properly. I have a laptop, the one I am currently typing this one, but it absolute shit and it can barely muster chibis let alone a huge, proper completed image. I COULD, and I say COULD, work on the commissions already bought but that would be a serious disservice and borderline rip off because of the quality drop. You would not be getting my usual quality of work, and that's what you paid for. You did not pay for a compressed chibi drawn on a laptop from the year 2000.
But on this note I am still in need of funds :/ and my only way to get funds is through art. I am unemployed and don't have a real job, and lets be honest between mental break downs and other issues I have not gotten my GED yet and I somehow doubt between mental break downs and decline of my mental and physical health I am going to get both my GED and a actual job within the next month. I had $1275 in my bank I wasn't supposed to touch but bills came up.
I am down to 300-500 atm which is just barely enough to cover the computer charges at the moment. But assuming something else does not come up I still need more funds.
I have this posted-http://www.furaffinity.net/view/34290693/ which will be completed on my Laptop however there have been no buyers :/ I am surely not going to ask for donations, I am not a E-beggar.
I also am offering bust/headshots starting at $20 each if anyone wants to help me out. I literally have no source of income ._ .
On That note assuming I get my computer back regardless if the files are retrieved, I may quit commissions after I complete all the ones I owe people. I admit I really don't like doing this 'job'. It's stressful, my income is absolute shit, I barely get paid anything its not really even worth my time. Even before the computer died my income was not good. My income on this website has never really been good, its not enough to support myself, fuck it doesn't even cover bills often. My income on this website has been slowing down for a while, it's really just honestly not worth bothering anymore. My income was barely anything to begin with but all this year its been dwindling, I went almost four months without pay. Not worth my time at all honestly. Restaurants don't stay open if there is no interest and neither should I.
Another issue with my commissions is I do not complete them in a timely manner. I have years old commissions at this point. And while I absolutely hate using this as a excuse I am being honest when I say this is the one thing holding me down and slowing me down; my mental health. It's shit. Really really shit. This year has been one of the worst years of my life next to the year when I was 9 and my cat got run over and it fucked me up for years after.
My mental health has been going down the shitter this year and its worse than its ever been and not getting better, infect worse! I am starting to have delusions which I assume is some early sign of schizophrenia.
I don't usually talk about it on here because this is my job, I don't know many people here, certainly not here enough to feel comfortable talking about it, but my mental health is complete garbage lately. "I should be on meds legit don't care if I'm dead" levels. If any of you watch my DeviantART you can see the now in thousands of posts I've made about my declining health to get the gist. My anxiety and depression controls me; I barely get out of bed lately. I am not well.
But yea between mental health and getting paid less than a mcdonalds worker I will probably quit commissions when I get my computer back and can finish the existing ones. Not worth my time honestly. I can't deliver art in a timely manner and the interest in my art has died almost completely. I guess it has to do with me not drawing hard core porn but guess what? I don't get paid enough for hardcore porn. Hence why you don't see any. If I got paid for it it be worth my time but I don't. I'm not gonna excerpt what is gonna take me more than a weeks of constant drawing for what amounts to less than I could get paid flipping fucking burgers. I'm not here for fun, I'm not here because I enjoy working here. I am here because I enjoy getting paid and having financial comfort. I don't have that so that leaves me with 0 reason to continue.
But yea tldr computer is still dead and I still need money. I got headshot/busts open. Comment if interested thx
Computer is still dead and at the repair guys place.
I thought I'd have it back by now but I'm told repair for this kind of thing generally takes a month(friend with exact same issue took this long as well). He says it looks hopeful but I won't hold my breathe until I can confirm I have my files back.
Speaking of which: I cannot work on previous bought commissions, otherwise I'd have started again. I do not have a computer that can draw properly. I have a laptop, the one I am currently typing this one, but it absolute shit and it can barely muster chibis let alone a huge, proper completed image. I COULD, and I say COULD, work on the commissions already bought but that would be a serious disservice and borderline rip off because of the quality drop. You would not be getting my usual quality of work, and that's what you paid for. You did not pay for a compressed chibi drawn on a laptop from the year 2000.
But on this note I am still in need of funds :/ and my only way to get funds is through art. I am unemployed and don't have a real job, and lets be honest between mental break downs and other issues I have not gotten my GED yet and I somehow doubt between mental break downs and decline of my mental and physical health I am going to get both my GED and a actual job within the next month. I had $1275 in my bank I wasn't supposed to touch but bills came up.
I am down to 300-500 atm which is just barely enough to cover the computer charges at the moment. But assuming something else does not come up I still need more funds.
I have this posted-http://www.furaffinity.net/view/34290693/ which will be completed on my Laptop however there have been no buyers :/ I am surely not going to ask for donations, I am not a E-beggar.
I also am offering bust/headshots starting at $20 each if anyone wants to help me out. I literally have no source of income ._ .
On That note assuming I get my computer back regardless if the files are retrieved, I may quit commissions after I complete all the ones I owe people. I admit I really don't like doing this 'job'. It's stressful, my income is absolute shit, I barely get paid anything its not really even worth my time. Even before the computer died my income was not good. My income on this website has never really been good, its not enough to support myself, fuck it doesn't even cover bills often. My income on this website has been slowing down for a while, it's really just honestly not worth bothering anymore. My income was barely anything to begin with but all this year its been dwindling, I went almost four months without pay. Not worth my time at all honestly. Restaurants don't stay open if there is no interest and neither should I.
Another issue with my commissions is I do not complete them in a timely manner. I have years old commissions at this point. And while I absolutely hate using this as a excuse I am being honest when I say this is the one thing holding me down and slowing me down; my mental health. It's shit. Really really shit. This year has been one of the worst years of my life next to the year when I was 9 and my cat got run over and it fucked me up for years after.
My mental health has been going down the shitter this year and its worse than its ever been and not getting better, infect worse! I am starting to have delusions which I assume is some early sign of schizophrenia.
I don't usually talk about it on here because this is my job, I don't know many people here, certainly not here enough to feel comfortable talking about it, but my mental health is complete garbage lately. "I should be on meds legit don't care if I'm dead" levels. If any of you watch my DeviantART you can see the now in thousands of posts I've made about my declining health to get the gist. My anxiety and depression controls me; I barely get out of bed lately. I am not well.
But yea between mental health and getting paid less than a mcdonalds worker I will probably quit commissions when I get my computer back and can finish the existing ones. Not worth my time honestly. I can't deliver art in a timely manner and the interest in my art has died almost completely. I guess it has to do with me not drawing hard core porn but guess what? I don't get paid enough for hardcore porn. Hence why you don't see any. If I got paid for it it be worth my time but I don't. I'm not gonna excerpt what is gonna take me more than a weeks of constant drawing for what amounts to less than I could get paid flipping fucking burgers. I'm not here for fun, I'm not here because I enjoy working here. I am here because I enjoy getting paid and having financial comfort. I don't have that so that leaves me with 0 reason to continue.
But yea tldr computer is still dead and I still need money. I got headshot/busts open. Comment if interested thx
I'm hoping to get back into drawing within the week or the next few days but I'm waiting for the PC repair guy to sent me my photoshop brushes, fonts and some extra stuff back I had forgotten to ask for.
I've had issues selling art months before any of my big issues happened. Wasn't selling art even when my list was shorter and long before my mental health began slowing me down. I've had a lot of people telling me this is why I'm not selling art but I wasn't selling art way earlier this year before I had several mental break downs, two pet deaths and PC died making me physically unable to finish pcs. I've had issues selling art over the years even when I've barely had any on my list lol. My pay on this website has never been good. I mention it all the time but I get paid less than a weeks worth at McDonald's.. I guess it's a matter of opinion but I'm very certain my art isn't selling just because the interest just has completely gone. Wasn't selling art even before I started losing track of everything. Almost all my comments from the 3-4 month period where I sold not one thing, even ychs posted at $10 was cheap assholes telling me my art is too expensive to be sold and how I should work cheaper.
But yea between mental illness dragging me down most of the time, shit pay and complete lack of interest save for... Like two people I think, and dealing with a lot of assholes on this site constantly telling me $25 isn't worth my art let alone the actual price I want for my art it's just really not worth my time or effort lately anymore. I didn't enjoy this art to begin, never have and probably never will, but the last year was just full of bad experiences and I don't think I want to spend this year with piles of stressful commissions and assholes devaluing my art every second...
I'll probably quit commissions after finishing them all, or at least take less.
Ah I yearn for the day I get a real job that pays substantially, finish all my commissions and can abandon my FA lol. Good times....
I appreciate the offer but not only do I not allow commissions to be traded/switched, I'm certain I already started on yours especially the sketch. And no even if commissions from scratch that aren't ychs are higher priced. Be something like 30-50$ for a commission of that quality(technically betters quality because I don't draw on my laptop now I have my PC back)not a ych.
And no, under no circumstances do i start work without pay.