FA+
Shop
The Return
6 years ago
General
Phoenix never dies, as they say. It just turns into ashes, then just gets back to life like nothing ever happened. Always returns to pester you and peck that snack of yours after a long, exhausting day of work, right when you want to relax. Avian creatures can cause plenty of mischief sometimes, don't they?
Either way, I'm back, just like the aforementioned creature, except I'm not gonna peck your snack. If anything has to happen to your snack, it'll be devoured rather than just nibbled on slightly. But it's not your food that I'm the most interested about, but eyes. No, not gonna poke them out, unless you really take offence to large creatures. Then it's not my issue anyway, it's your issue. Instead, I'm going to (hopefully) entertain your mind through your eyes, while you look at my creations that I've created. Very hard emphasis on me there, and more about why I did that later in this journal. But yes, hello, this annoying, screeching dragon has returned, for better or worse.
If you don't want to read something like an autobiography, just skip a few paragraphs, I'll mark it down nicely so you'll see when that stuff is over.
(oh also I didn't double read some of the stuff below, so if I'm talking out of my arse - feel free to point it out in the comments, I'll likely clarify some holes in my thoughts)
So yeah, where do I begin... Maybe let's just go from the start, a few years back when I started drawing. My depression has started around the same time too, awesome. Not only I'm dealing with learning art, I'm also trying to cope with the world around me that I felt so alienated from, being the ambitious and interaction starved teen I was. Cool. There were better and worse days, but in the end - two things are quite important to mention. One - I've finally decided to stick to something in my life, rather than have no clear cut goal for the future and any sense of direction, progress, devoid of emotions or anything special. And second - in the process I've met a lot of people. Some of them I still know to this day and I talk to them almost daily, some of them were friendships that just faded over time, and some... Well, to this day I feel they really hate me. Some people might have a valid point for it, some might not, who am I to judge.
Ever since I started drawing I've had few iterations of my dreams, through animated series, to movies, comic series and any mix of the aforementioned. Two things they all had in common: they were all very ambitious, large projects. And they were all planned with some grander purpose to them, larger than just telling a story and getting on with it, entertaining people. The purpose changed multiple times and evolved over time, but it was always there, and always was, at least in my eyes, for the greater good of society and humanity as a whole. A very foolish and pretentious assumption to make for a teenager, isn't it?
Now fast forward some time, depression is still there, sure, but it's getting better, starting to cope with it, then I discover Furaffinity and the weird things that lie within... And, shock! "There are other people that are into something as weird as I am into? Oh no. OH NO. I hate myself for it!". And as I thought - I did, undoing some progress in fight against depression in the process. Even now when thinking about my weird deviation it sometimes makes me reconsider the fabric of reality and if the pizza that I ate last week was not judging me as I ate it. And for a very long time I've had no idea what even made me hate it. I still don't have a 100% certainty about it, but I'll say what I feel like saying in this regard... later. Because, you see, before I figured something out, there were some things prior to that. And one of them was...
...The moment I started drawing the more kinky things, actually tried to break through my fears and anxieties. It wasn't easy, but I've met plenty of people that helped me with it and were overall pretty accepting of it. So accepting, in fact, that I think to this day I was, and still am, the most judgemental person in regards to myself. But yeah, I just rolled along, rolled and rolled. But there was a point where every mini-plot line described above just merged into one, and it was... Well... Not so great, as you might expect. Because what happens when you mix a depressed, ambitious teenager with shit loads of anxiety, insecurity and self-disgust flowing in his veins?
Poison. Literal poison. And I drank it all. And then paid for it dearly, being lucky to even go through it unbroken.
The insanely high ambition I've had basically drove me to quite a lot of things. Always being told that I'm some super great person in my childhood, that everyone else bullies me because they are jealous of me and my awesomeness made me feel superior to others. And that then clashed with the realization that, fuck, I'm not as great as I thought I was. Hard reality check, and a large dose of dissonance that followed. Who's right in this case? Is it the people that told me that I'm great and awesome, or is it the world that politely reminded me that I'm not as awesome as I think I am? I just couldn't quite manage the fact that I might be both things at once, so things went fucky. Very fucky. Lots of drama, lots of feeling like I'm above other people and that I am better, but also feeling like I am isolated and basically thrown aside by like, everyone. But... To achieve my ambitious goals, I needed to be popular. VERY popular. And, seeing as people that were making things I've considered inferior and getting A LOT of success for it, I've decided to just kinda copy them and follow their tracks. I've joined the endless rat race, the popularity contest and let the greed take a hold over me. And with greed, I've also allowed negative emotions to pour right in too - jealousy, unjustified hatred, angst.
What ended up happening at some point is just me trying to mass produce art, to appeal to the largest possible demographic, trying to get as much as I could in the shortest time possible, always feeling like I'm on a timer, rushing it all. You can kinda even see the quality drop because of it in few places where I tripped up and just yeet an image out because "fuck it, others are doing worse job than me and are getting more faves than me". And here you can cue the surprised Pikachu face that I've had when an art like that didn't get a shit load of views. And where did I try to find blame? It ain't me who's in the wrong, it's them! Those disgusting furries, who just don't see the true quality of the things I put out! It's all their fault for my failures! As you might have guessed, that went very well. So well in fact that I haven't made any bigger leaps in my arts for more than a year.
And so, after few months of that, I've started to feel worn out on art. I essentially started to procrastinate everything, commission list that I've had giving me large anxiety, preventing me from drawing too much, if at all, lots of delays, next to no progress and, above all, a slight regression in terms of my mental state. It went so far as to make me just essentially give up on those ambitious dreams that I've had and stop caring, since I just won't ever get there, might as well just give up now and fuck off. But, giving up on art? The only thing I've ever committed to in life? The only thing that had at least some sort of value for my future? I didn't want to do that. So I've kept on going for few months more, getting more worn and more torn as I went. And then, the final straw before I decided to take some sort of a break happened, which I can't really disclose even now. Either way, the result was the last large journal I've made that you might've seen.
Ever since I left, I just kinda went on doing whatever I did, except no longer taking part in the community too much. Just vibin' along. Posting arts on Discord servers and Telegram channels, just enjoying whatever I had left to enjoy in life, slowly regaining some sanity, peace of mind, maturing as I went along, actually having some fun again. And it just kinda struck me that it was me being my own issue for that long ass time, all I had to do was to just chill out, do something for myself for once and figure myself out. Fame and whatever else comes with it was not the solution, even to feeling ignored and abandoned for all those long years, of long dramas, in various places, with all those people that I've had fights with (In hindsight - fuck some of them though, even till this day. I only wish I wouldn't have wasted so much time and effort on them, as it really led to nothing in the end.). I've just realized that I am this kind of person that was never cut out to be super likeable and super popular, ever. I just am who I am, whatever the fuck it is that I am. I don't believe that I am an evil person, the worst this world has seen, but I don't believe I'm some kind of angel that others should follow either. I just am some kinkyfucker69 with lots of my own opinions that not everybody has to agree with. And about them...
[if you really don't want to read others' opinions, for whatever reason, don't read the 4 paragraphs below]
The only thing that I've still retained, in a way, is my general distaste towards the furry fandom in a larger scope. Don't get me wrong, it's not all bad, it's just that some people within the fandom are really, really vocal about certain things and I really think it'd be better for everyone involved if they just thought a few more times before they post something. It not only paints a bad image of them as people, but also damages the image of the community and encourages some really bad behaviours in others that follow them, especially those really susceptible to things like peer pressure. Then there's also lots of toxicity in some parts of the fandom, lots of drama and general hostility. Very, very extreme behaviours, where if you disagree with some people in the community you're gonna basically the devil himself, because you dare to disagree with somebody. And then there's also plenty of people within the fandom that I think shouldn't even be welcome further than 50 meters away from a specialist facility in which they should be educated about their wrongdoings, let alone a furry con or a public place with a lot of minors around. Yeah, it annoys me that some people became so accepting of other people and how different they are that we're allowing objectively awful people to roam around among them without any backlash from the larger part of the fandom, some communities even being totally okay with those people and accepting of what they are into, even if it is illegal practically everywhere in the world. Just, disgusting to me. And sure, there is no way to truly enforce that with 100% effectiveness, but what I'm advocating is... Please, at least try. At least if things fail in the end, you can say you've at least tried.
And as to why I've had issues accepting my kink, and still do sometimes... I'm just different. Very fucking different, in fact. The things I like are just so oddly specific and so niche, within a niche fetish already... And it's kinda funny, since I've seen arts closer to what I like in other fetishes, like vore and pregnancy, rather than inflation. But there usually was something about those arts that just didn't stick with me, always something that I'm not into, either the topic of the art itself or something in the execution just being that tiny bit off and generally irking me enough not to like the image. And inflation fetish arts... Well, they either are completely different kind of inflation to what I like, or the execution is sometimes just kinda lacking, or there's something that really annoys me about the art. A lot of it down to just personal preference really.
But a lot of the time it's also quality. In a lot of cases - it's really, really bad. And sure, everyone sucked at some point in their creations, yes. Everyone had to go through that shitty stage and evolve. Key word is evolve. With some of the artists I really feel like they're already at the top of their abilities, plus a lot of them acts like they wouldn't want to hear anything other than just praise of what they're doing. Sure, nice words are encouraging, but sugar-coating it forever deals more harm than good. Sometimes you gotta just accept that somebody might not like a thing in an image and might suggest an improvement to it. It's up to the artist to decide if he agrees with it and implements it or if he ignores it because it's not what he envisioned or won't work too well with what he's trying to go for. Or when it's simply a shite suggestion, cuz they do happen sometimes, yes. Artist isn't always right, as some parts of the community behave, which ties in with one of the previous paragraphs a little bit. As much as hearing all the praise feels nice a lot of the time and might be encouraging in the short term, personally I feel a lot more motivated if somebody suggests me something to improve with my arts, to get better and just enjoy my own arts even more. If I enjoy what I'm doing, "coincidentally" others tend to like those images more too, which further improves the quality of arts, since they all praise it more and now point out some more possible improvements, blah blah blah, a positive loop sets in and everyone benefits in the long term. Sure, not everyone might be in it for more than just passing some time, but even then I'd say it's always good to learn new things and improve, who knows, maybe things will get dire one day for you and art will be the thing you'll find solitude in, or maybe even work as an artist, because nowhere else will there be a place for you in the cruel job market of the future?
You're free to comment down below about how full of shit I am by saying any of the above, I'll gladly read it and possibly reconsider my approach on the whole issue, because that's what discussions are for - conversation, not for somebody to smear shit all over the other person because his opinion is just so shite and there is only one correct opinion about things.
|| THIS IS WHERE THE OPINIONS AND PERSONAL STUFF ENDS ||
So, what will happen with the art side of things, and my general online presence? Well, for starters, it will exist again. But, I want to start from scratch, in a way. Rebuild my online presence from ground up, lay new foundations and all. And so, I will comprehensibly list all the major changes, in few points with a bit of extra explanations:
>It's MY show!
So this means that I'm essentially doing whatever the fuck I want in here. If you're not following me for what I am doing, or you don't like what I'm doing - you're free to unfollow anytime, not holding you hostage or anything. Won't hold it against you, it happens. It's okay to do this. Feel free to unfollow also if you really disagree with me or whatever, but if you'd rather go down into the comments to tell me how full of shit I am for saying something - I encourage you to do so, just remain civil while doing so, it's a lot better for everyone involved. But yeah, overall, expect me to now be myself a lot more, rather than put up a facade that makes me more marketable and all that. Will also have to make some sort of short bio on a lot of the sites for myself, yeah.
>A LOT more interaction, once again!
As some of you might now, I'm kind of an open person and I love interacting with people, forming a community and all, just generally being helpful too. So I'll do my best to interact with everyone as much as I can, and so I kind of expect you to do the same and try to interact with me, cuz you see... A wall isn't too responsive, isn't it? Just stands there and does fuck all, no matter how much you talk to it or push it. I'm not gonna be a wall to you, unless you're gonna be really mean and unpleasant in general (and I am a quite patient person in regards to that). And so, I don't want you to be a wall towards me, yes-yes?
>Commissions - now limited and priced differently!
Less commissions in general I'm afraid, my dudes. Neglected my own, personal things due to my greed in not so recent past, and even more distant past. So I'll just limit comms to likely just 3 slots and open them periodically. Expect prices to change around plenty too. In both directions.
>Arts, arts, arts, of all kinds!
Kinky arts are not gonna go away entirely. But they are not going to always be the main focus, just whenever I feel like it. And they're going to be mostly arts of what I personally find enjoyable, except maybe few one-off arts once in a while. And don't expect the best quality every time either, I'll be posting a lot of different things, even sketches and all that jazz. And even if you're gonna feel starved for more of my arts...
>Discord? Telegram? Yeah, sure! Let's chat!
As some of you know, before departure I've made a Discord server for my followers that want to still follow me on my hiatus... Which then evolved and works as a shared server for 3 other artist friends of mine. I drop WIPs quite often there too, as I do on the Telegram channel that I have! And with the new year - we're likely going to return to the idea of monthly raffles over on Discord! Feel free to come there to throw your own arts around too, if you want! Y'all are accepted as long as you behave and don't do anything illegal, yas! It's also a very good way to catch me for a chat, ask me a question or two or just keep up to date on stuff. Telegram channel is also a thing where I post arts and random thoughts... and random shit too. Shitposts galore all the way! Links at the bottom of this journal! And speaking of keeping up to date...
>STREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMS!
Yup, last few weeks I've been streaming things. Drawing, gaming, shitty memes - you name it! And it's a thing I'd like to very much expand upon in 2020, hope to see you there! To make sure you're not gonna miss it - Telegram, Discord or Twitter announcements will likely be the most reliable means to find when I'm streaming! Picarto for arts and some gaming once in a while maybe, and Twitch for proper gaming, if that floats your boat.
>Art sites - a bit of a change...
Well, you remember Weasyl? Well, not gonna use it for the time being. DeviantART? While it's for SFW arts only, I'll still use it, even though it feels slightly limiting. Twitter? As long as they're not going to throw out all NSFW accounts under the bus - sure! What I want to try out and start using a lot more is FurryNetwork, seems like the site that might be the future, unless FA somehow catches up a decade with the website backend and features, since it's lacking by a lot in that department... Even the new look that it just received doesn't look so future proof, after all. Hopefully it all works out well in the end, yes?
>All support appreciated!
While Patreon might not be a nice site for... Quite a long time for creators like me, or generally for anybody not living in the US and not wanting to put up with some W8BEN forms, there are alternatives. But I still haven't found one that's not devoid of life or just simply shite. Best I can offer you is a PayPal link to donate me some ca$h if you feel like it, but that's not the only way you can support me!
"Wait, what? Why does this sound like you're trying to advertise some shitty mobile game here and tell us to use an affiliate code?" That's right! I've never been much of a mobile gamer, but, forget everything you think you know about mobile games because Raid Shadow Legends is one of the most ambitious RPG projects of 2019 has just been released and will change everything!
Horrible jokes aside, just commenting, leaving a fave on the art or sharing it around helps me A LOT in the long term! Leaving critique or even a negative opinion about the art is also very much appreciated, so don't feel afraid about it! To also clarify things a little bit more, I won't mind if you save my art to your hard drive for whatever reason you might have, as long as you're not trying to profit off of it. That being said, if you wanna trace my art - sure, do so, as long as you're not gonna do so for any quantifiable profit! I'd appreciate a credit too! If you feel like my art is good enough to be put up on e621 - go ahead and submit it there! Posting things there by myself is kind of tedious, especially the tags when you're kind of uninterested in all those weird naming conventions for fetishes. I just draw, I don't care to name every single vagibone there is, man! Either way, point is, no need to ship trains full of gold to this dragon to make him happy - a bit of assistance and interaction will do wonders too!
If I remind myself something that I forgot to say earlier, I'll let y'all know about it, until then though... Merry christ-- I mean, happy new year to y'all! And see ya in 2020, hopefully a lot more prosperous year than 2019 was!
PS. Just realized how poorly blocks of text look on the new layout on FA... you might want to check out the journal from FurryNetwork, might be easier to read!
Here's the links:
Telegram channel, also the other Telegram channel for racing related news and reports
Discord server
Twitter
DeviantART
Furaffinity (you are here, silly!)
FurryNetwork
Picarto
Twitch
Either way, I'm back, just like the aforementioned creature, except I'm not gonna peck your snack. If anything has to happen to your snack, it'll be devoured rather than just nibbled on slightly. But it's not your food that I'm the most interested about, but eyes. No, not gonna poke them out, unless you really take offence to large creatures. Then it's not my issue anyway, it's your issue. Instead, I'm going to (hopefully) entertain your mind through your eyes, while you look at my creations that I've created. Very hard emphasis on me there, and more about why I did that later in this journal. But yes, hello, this annoying, screeching dragon has returned, for better or worse.
If you don't want to read something like an autobiography, just skip a few paragraphs, I'll mark it down nicely so you'll see when that stuff is over.
(oh also I didn't double read some of the stuff below, so if I'm talking out of my arse - feel free to point it out in the comments, I'll likely clarify some holes in my thoughts)
So yeah, where do I begin... Maybe let's just go from the start, a few years back when I started drawing. My depression has started around the same time too, awesome. Not only I'm dealing with learning art, I'm also trying to cope with the world around me that I felt so alienated from, being the ambitious and interaction starved teen I was. Cool. There were better and worse days, but in the end - two things are quite important to mention. One - I've finally decided to stick to something in my life, rather than have no clear cut goal for the future and any sense of direction, progress, devoid of emotions or anything special. And second - in the process I've met a lot of people. Some of them I still know to this day and I talk to them almost daily, some of them were friendships that just faded over time, and some... Well, to this day I feel they really hate me. Some people might have a valid point for it, some might not, who am I to judge.
Ever since I started drawing I've had few iterations of my dreams, through animated series, to movies, comic series and any mix of the aforementioned. Two things they all had in common: they were all very ambitious, large projects. And they were all planned with some grander purpose to them, larger than just telling a story and getting on with it, entertaining people. The purpose changed multiple times and evolved over time, but it was always there, and always was, at least in my eyes, for the greater good of society and humanity as a whole. A very foolish and pretentious assumption to make for a teenager, isn't it?
Now fast forward some time, depression is still there, sure, but it's getting better, starting to cope with it, then I discover Furaffinity and the weird things that lie within... And, shock! "There are other people that are into something as weird as I am into? Oh no. OH NO. I hate myself for it!". And as I thought - I did, undoing some progress in fight against depression in the process. Even now when thinking about my weird deviation it sometimes makes me reconsider the fabric of reality and if the pizza that I ate last week was not judging me as I ate it. And for a very long time I've had no idea what even made me hate it. I still don't have a 100% certainty about it, but I'll say what I feel like saying in this regard... later. Because, you see, before I figured something out, there were some things prior to that. And one of them was...
...The moment I started drawing the more kinky things, actually tried to break through my fears and anxieties. It wasn't easy, but I've met plenty of people that helped me with it and were overall pretty accepting of it. So accepting, in fact, that I think to this day I was, and still am, the most judgemental person in regards to myself. But yeah, I just rolled along, rolled and rolled. But there was a point where every mini-plot line described above just merged into one, and it was... Well... Not so great, as you might expect. Because what happens when you mix a depressed, ambitious teenager with shit loads of anxiety, insecurity and self-disgust flowing in his veins?
Poison. Literal poison. And I drank it all. And then paid for it dearly, being lucky to even go through it unbroken.
The insanely high ambition I've had basically drove me to quite a lot of things. Always being told that I'm some super great person in my childhood, that everyone else bullies me because they are jealous of me and my awesomeness made me feel superior to others. And that then clashed with the realization that, fuck, I'm not as great as I thought I was. Hard reality check, and a large dose of dissonance that followed. Who's right in this case? Is it the people that told me that I'm great and awesome, or is it the world that politely reminded me that I'm not as awesome as I think I am? I just couldn't quite manage the fact that I might be both things at once, so things went fucky. Very fucky. Lots of drama, lots of feeling like I'm above other people and that I am better, but also feeling like I am isolated and basically thrown aside by like, everyone. But... To achieve my ambitious goals, I needed to be popular. VERY popular. And, seeing as people that were making things I've considered inferior and getting A LOT of success for it, I've decided to just kinda copy them and follow their tracks. I've joined the endless rat race, the popularity contest and let the greed take a hold over me. And with greed, I've also allowed negative emotions to pour right in too - jealousy, unjustified hatred, angst.
What ended up happening at some point is just me trying to mass produce art, to appeal to the largest possible demographic, trying to get as much as I could in the shortest time possible, always feeling like I'm on a timer, rushing it all. You can kinda even see the quality drop because of it in few places where I tripped up and just yeet an image out because "fuck it, others are doing worse job than me and are getting more faves than me". And here you can cue the surprised Pikachu face that I've had when an art like that didn't get a shit load of views. And where did I try to find blame? It ain't me who's in the wrong, it's them! Those disgusting furries, who just don't see the true quality of the things I put out! It's all their fault for my failures! As you might have guessed, that went very well. So well in fact that I haven't made any bigger leaps in my arts for more than a year.
And so, after few months of that, I've started to feel worn out on art. I essentially started to procrastinate everything, commission list that I've had giving me large anxiety, preventing me from drawing too much, if at all, lots of delays, next to no progress and, above all, a slight regression in terms of my mental state. It went so far as to make me just essentially give up on those ambitious dreams that I've had and stop caring, since I just won't ever get there, might as well just give up now and fuck off. But, giving up on art? The only thing I've ever committed to in life? The only thing that had at least some sort of value for my future? I didn't want to do that. So I've kept on going for few months more, getting more worn and more torn as I went. And then, the final straw before I decided to take some sort of a break happened, which I can't really disclose even now. Either way, the result was the last large journal I've made that you might've seen.
Ever since I left, I just kinda went on doing whatever I did, except no longer taking part in the community too much. Just vibin' along. Posting arts on Discord servers and Telegram channels, just enjoying whatever I had left to enjoy in life, slowly regaining some sanity, peace of mind, maturing as I went along, actually having some fun again. And it just kinda struck me that it was me being my own issue for that long ass time, all I had to do was to just chill out, do something for myself for once and figure myself out. Fame and whatever else comes with it was not the solution, even to feeling ignored and abandoned for all those long years, of long dramas, in various places, with all those people that I've had fights with (In hindsight - fuck some of them though, even till this day. I only wish I wouldn't have wasted so much time and effort on them, as it really led to nothing in the end.). I've just realized that I am this kind of person that was never cut out to be super likeable and super popular, ever. I just am who I am, whatever the fuck it is that I am. I don't believe that I am an evil person, the worst this world has seen, but I don't believe I'm some kind of angel that others should follow either. I just am some kinkyfucker69 with lots of my own opinions that not everybody has to agree with. And about them...
[if you really don't want to read others' opinions, for whatever reason, don't read the 4 paragraphs below]
The only thing that I've still retained, in a way, is my general distaste towards the furry fandom in a larger scope. Don't get me wrong, it's not all bad, it's just that some people within the fandom are really, really vocal about certain things and I really think it'd be better for everyone involved if they just thought a few more times before they post something. It not only paints a bad image of them as people, but also damages the image of the community and encourages some really bad behaviours in others that follow them, especially those really susceptible to things like peer pressure. Then there's also lots of toxicity in some parts of the fandom, lots of drama and general hostility. Very, very extreme behaviours, where if you disagree with some people in the community you're gonna basically the devil himself, because you dare to disagree with somebody. And then there's also plenty of people within the fandom that I think shouldn't even be welcome further than 50 meters away from a specialist facility in which they should be educated about their wrongdoings, let alone a furry con or a public place with a lot of minors around. Yeah, it annoys me that some people became so accepting of other people and how different they are that we're allowing objectively awful people to roam around among them without any backlash from the larger part of the fandom, some communities even being totally okay with those people and accepting of what they are into, even if it is illegal practically everywhere in the world. Just, disgusting to me. And sure, there is no way to truly enforce that with 100% effectiveness, but what I'm advocating is... Please, at least try. At least if things fail in the end, you can say you've at least tried.
And as to why I've had issues accepting my kink, and still do sometimes... I'm just different. Very fucking different, in fact. The things I like are just so oddly specific and so niche, within a niche fetish already... And it's kinda funny, since I've seen arts closer to what I like in other fetishes, like vore and pregnancy, rather than inflation. But there usually was something about those arts that just didn't stick with me, always something that I'm not into, either the topic of the art itself or something in the execution just being that tiny bit off and generally irking me enough not to like the image. And inflation fetish arts... Well, they either are completely different kind of inflation to what I like, or the execution is sometimes just kinda lacking, or there's something that really annoys me about the art. A lot of it down to just personal preference really.
But a lot of the time it's also quality. In a lot of cases - it's really, really bad. And sure, everyone sucked at some point in their creations, yes. Everyone had to go through that shitty stage and evolve. Key word is evolve. With some of the artists I really feel like they're already at the top of their abilities, plus a lot of them acts like they wouldn't want to hear anything other than just praise of what they're doing. Sure, nice words are encouraging, but sugar-coating it forever deals more harm than good. Sometimes you gotta just accept that somebody might not like a thing in an image and might suggest an improvement to it. It's up to the artist to decide if he agrees with it and implements it or if he ignores it because it's not what he envisioned or won't work too well with what he's trying to go for. Or when it's simply a shite suggestion, cuz they do happen sometimes, yes. Artist isn't always right, as some parts of the community behave, which ties in with one of the previous paragraphs a little bit. As much as hearing all the praise feels nice a lot of the time and might be encouraging in the short term, personally I feel a lot more motivated if somebody suggests me something to improve with my arts, to get better and just enjoy my own arts even more. If I enjoy what I'm doing, "coincidentally" others tend to like those images more too, which further improves the quality of arts, since they all praise it more and now point out some more possible improvements, blah blah blah, a positive loop sets in and everyone benefits in the long term. Sure, not everyone might be in it for more than just passing some time, but even then I'd say it's always good to learn new things and improve, who knows, maybe things will get dire one day for you and art will be the thing you'll find solitude in, or maybe even work as an artist, because nowhere else will there be a place for you in the cruel job market of the future?
You're free to comment down below about how full of shit I am by saying any of the above, I'll gladly read it and possibly reconsider my approach on the whole issue, because that's what discussions are for - conversation, not for somebody to smear shit all over the other person because his opinion is just so shite and there is only one correct opinion about things.
|| THIS IS WHERE THE OPINIONS AND PERSONAL STUFF ENDS ||
So, what will happen with the art side of things, and my general online presence? Well, for starters, it will exist again. But, I want to start from scratch, in a way. Rebuild my online presence from ground up, lay new foundations and all. And so, I will comprehensibly list all the major changes, in few points with a bit of extra explanations:
>It's MY show!
So this means that I'm essentially doing whatever the fuck I want in here. If you're not following me for what I am doing, or you don't like what I'm doing - you're free to unfollow anytime, not holding you hostage or anything. Won't hold it against you, it happens. It's okay to do this. Feel free to unfollow also if you really disagree with me or whatever, but if you'd rather go down into the comments to tell me how full of shit I am for saying something - I encourage you to do so, just remain civil while doing so, it's a lot better for everyone involved. But yeah, overall, expect me to now be myself a lot more, rather than put up a facade that makes me more marketable and all that. Will also have to make some sort of short bio on a lot of the sites for myself, yeah.
>A LOT more interaction, once again!
As some of you might now, I'm kind of an open person and I love interacting with people, forming a community and all, just generally being helpful too. So I'll do my best to interact with everyone as much as I can, and so I kind of expect you to do the same and try to interact with me, cuz you see... A wall isn't too responsive, isn't it? Just stands there and does fuck all, no matter how much you talk to it or push it. I'm not gonna be a wall to you, unless you're gonna be really mean and unpleasant in general (and I am a quite patient person in regards to that). And so, I don't want you to be a wall towards me, yes-yes?
>Commissions - now limited and priced differently!
Less commissions in general I'm afraid, my dudes. Neglected my own, personal things due to my greed in not so recent past, and even more distant past. So I'll just limit comms to likely just 3 slots and open them periodically. Expect prices to change around plenty too. In both directions.
>Arts, arts, arts, of all kinds!
Kinky arts are not gonna go away entirely. But they are not going to always be the main focus, just whenever I feel like it. And they're going to be mostly arts of what I personally find enjoyable, except maybe few one-off arts once in a while. And don't expect the best quality every time either, I'll be posting a lot of different things, even sketches and all that jazz. And even if you're gonna feel starved for more of my arts...
>Discord? Telegram? Yeah, sure! Let's chat!
As some of you know, before departure I've made a Discord server for my followers that want to still follow me on my hiatus... Which then evolved and works as a shared server for 3 other artist friends of mine. I drop WIPs quite often there too, as I do on the Telegram channel that I have! And with the new year - we're likely going to return to the idea of monthly raffles over on Discord! Feel free to come there to throw your own arts around too, if you want! Y'all are accepted as long as you behave and don't do anything illegal, yas! It's also a very good way to catch me for a chat, ask me a question or two or just keep up to date on stuff. Telegram channel is also a thing where I post arts and random thoughts... and random shit too. Shitposts galore all the way! Links at the bottom of this journal! And speaking of keeping up to date...
>STREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMS!
Yup, last few weeks I've been streaming things. Drawing, gaming, shitty memes - you name it! And it's a thing I'd like to very much expand upon in 2020, hope to see you there! To make sure you're not gonna miss it - Telegram, Discord or Twitter announcements will likely be the most reliable means to find when I'm streaming! Picarto for arts and some gaming once in a while maybe, and Twitch for proper gaming, if that floats your boat.
>Art sites - a bit of a change...
Well, you remember Weasyl? Well, not gonna use it for the time being. DeviantART? While it's for SFW arts only, I'll still use it, even though it feels slightly limiting. Twitter? As long as they're not going to throw out all NSFW accounts under the bus - sure! What I want to try out and start using a lot more is FurryNetwork, seems like the site that might be the future, unless FA somehow catches up a decade with the website backend and features, since it's lacking by a lot in that department... Even the new look that it just received doesn't look so future proof, after all. Hopefully it all works out well in the end, yes?
>All support appreciated!
While Patreon might not be a nice site for... Quite a long time for creators like me, or generally for anybody not living in the US and not wanting to put up with some W8BEN forms, there are alternatives. But I still haven't found one that's not devoid of life or just simply shite. Best I can offer you is a PayPal link to donate me some ca$h if you feel like it, but that's not the only way you can support me!
"Wait, what? Why does this sound like you're trying to advertise some shitty mobile game here and tell us to use an affiliate code?" That's right! I've never been much of a mobile gamer, but, forget everything you think you know about mobile games because Raid Shadow Legends is one of the most ambitious RPG projects of 2019 has just been released and will change everything!
Horrible jokes aside, just commenting, leaving a fave on the art or sharing it around helps me A LOT in the long term! Leaving critique or even a negative opinion about the art is also very much appreciated, so don't feel afraid about it! To also clarify things a little bit more, I won't mind if you save my art to your hard drive for whatever reason you might have, as long as you're not trying to profit off of it. That being said, if you wanna trace my art - sure, do so, as long as you're not gonna do so for any quantifiable profit! I'd appreciate a credit too! If you feel like my art is good enough to be put up on e621 - go ahead and submit it there! Posting things there by myself is kind of tedious, especially the tags when you're kind of uninterested in all those weird naming conventions for fetishes. I just draw, I don't care to name every single vagibone there is, man! Either way, point is, no need to ship trains full of gold to this dragon to make him happy - a bit of assistance and interaction will do wonders too!
If I remind myself something that I forgot to say earlier, I'll let y'all know about it, until then though... Merry christ-- I mean, happy new year to y'all! And see ya in 2020, hopefully a lot more prosperous year than 2019 was!
PS. Just realized how poorly blocks of text look on the new layout on FA... you might want to check out the journal from FurryNetwork, might be easier to read!
Here's the links:
Telegram channel, also the other Telegram channel for racing related news and reports
Discord server
DeviantART
Furaffinity (you are here, silly!)
FurryNetwork
Picarto
Twitch
And aey, thanks! Tbh idk how to respond to it so I'll just say thanks, I guess lmao
Meanwhile I'll go to your furaffinity acco...
Oh, yeah, I'm here already...
So silly😪