Fire Emblem Heroes and how I hate myself for playing it.
5 years ago
Whenever I see new characters come out for Fire Emblem Heroes, I think: "Man, I am glad I stopped playing that game." And I am glad. That game literally ate my wallet. I love Fire Emblem, one of my favourite series. So when I heard about a mobile Fire Emblem game, I had to get it. [b]And I seriously fucking wish I didn't.[b/] I spent an absolute FUCK-TON of money on that fucking game! I will not say how much, but trust me, no matter who you are, you'd be disappointed in me. I know I am. Every day that goes by, I just wish that I never downloaded that game. I would've had so much money still, but I had to spend it on that FUCKING game. I knew that I was spending too much on it too. Every time I went to the store on that game, I kept telling myself to stop. But I kept on buying... Fucking hate myself for that.
One day, I decided to look up how much I actually spent on that game and I was absolutely flabbergasted. Again, I'll not say how much, but it was stupid. I was completely disheartened. I absolutely hates myself for how much I spent. I was at the main screen on the game, still reeling. I had to delete this game. I didn't have the heart to play it anymore. And so, I did. I delete it. It felt weird. The game was no longer on my phone. I couldn't find it anywhere. I went to the game's app store page and it didn't say "Play" or "Update", it said "Install".
I honestly felt happy. I felt like I did the right thing, and I did. That game, despite how much I love Fire Emblem, had to go. That game was the only reason I had to use my phone. Honestly? I feel like I don't have friends. I have only once texted something on my phone, never called anyone with it or anything. The only thing I use my phone for now is for music and to check my bank account. Other than that, it just sits there now. Only being used when I need it for those two things. I do somewhat wish I was like other people. Y'know, having friends to talk to. But I suppose there is an upside to this: I'm not glued to my phone.
I'm just a very introverted person. I rarely start conversations with strangers. The only time I really say anything is when someone says something to me first. I'm always self-conscious of pretty much everything I say and do. This introvertedness also applies to online stuff. Like, for example, I have a mic on my headset. Yet, I've only used it once. I have friends on Steam, but I never talk to them. I chatted with my friend from school when it was his birthday. He and I talked for a bit and then...silence. But it's not his fault, it's definitely mine. It's just how I am. It's how I am and I wish it wasn't.
One day, I decided to look up how much I actually spent on that game and I was absolutely flabbergasted. Again, I'll not say how much, but it was stupid. I was completely disheartened. I absolutely hates myself for how much I spent. I was at the main screen on the game, still reeling. I had to delete this game. I didn't have the heart to play it anymore. And so, I did. I delete it. It felt weird. The game was no longer on my phone. I couldn't find it anywhere. I went to the game's app store page and it didn't say "Play" or "Update", it said "Install".
I honestly felt happy. I felt like I did the right thing, and I did. That game, despite how much I love Fire Emblem, had to go. That game was the only reason I had to use my phone. Honestly? I feel like I don't have friends. I have only once texted something on my phone, never called anyone with it or anything. The only thing I use my phone for now is for music and to check my bank account. Other than that, it just sits there now. Only being used when I need it for those two things. I do somewhat wish I was like other people. Y'know, having friends to talk to. But I suppose there is an upside to this: I'm not glued to my phone.
I'm just a very introverted person. I rarely start conversations with strangers. The only time I really say anything is when someone says something to me first. I'm always self-conscious of pretty much everything I say and do. This introvertedness also applies to online stuff. Like, for example, I have a mic on my headset. Yet, I've only used it once. I have friends on Steam, but I never talk to them. I chatted with my friend from school when it was his birthday. He and I talked for a bit and then...silence. But it's not his fault, it's definitely mine. It's just how I am. It's how I am and I wish it wasn't.
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