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This is so sureal
5 years ago
So, I'm writing this just to vent some of my own personal stress. I am in no way diminishing or saying I have it worse than any one and I really do feel that we are all in this together, but all I can talk about is my own little slice, so here-goes.
So fuck. This Covid-19 thing has blown up in our faces. School is closed and we are expected to put together "distance learning" options. HA! half my students don't have access to the web and the other half are totally not gonna do it even if they do *facedesk* They said we'd be back April 1st but now it's April 27th. Don't get me wrong. The measures in place are important. This virus is actually bad news bears, but shutting down the entire economy is too.
To top it off, I have an underlying condition as I have bronchial based asthma. What that means is occasionally, I cough. I have actually been attacked for coughing. Even when I tried to explain that I wasn't sick! A lady on the metro attacked me and told me to get the fuck off the train, an uber driver freaked out, violently pulled over and sprayed me with hand sanitizer, (Which, standard hand sanitizer causes a violent reacting for me where my skin literally feels like it's on fire for the next day to 3 days. I actually threatened to sue uber for that.), a guy in the grocery store went ballistic on me!
So yes, I feel like a pariah, I no longer have a job to go too, I am expected to work miracles for my students from behind my computer....and on top of that, I'm really worried about my mom. She's 69 and in good health but this stuff hits the elderly and that just worries me.
So my current mental state is "AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHH!!!!" I had an actual panic attack the other night, like, hyperventilating and all. I'm ok now but I haven't had one of those in years. I won't talk about some of the more personal stresses at home that make things all the worse, but suffice it to say, Fuck this. Honestly fuck this!
Ok, rant over. If you took the time to read this, thank you. If you are dealing right now and want to share, I would be glad to talk. I think during this time we need to move in, not away. Someone told me that they were thinking of it as physical distancing, not social distancing, because now more than ever, we need to look out for each other. I hope you abd yours are well and making it through these troubling times. There will be art and content to come soon. Stay safe and well.
So fuck. This Covid-19 thing has blown up in our faces. School is closed and we are expected to put together "distance learning" options. HA! half my students don't have access to the web and the other half are totally not gonna do it even if they do *facedesk* They said we'd be back April 1st but now it's April 27th. Don't get me wrong. The measures in place are important. This virus is actually bad news bears, but shutting down the entire economy is too.
To top it off, I have an underlying condition as I have bronchial based asthma. What that means is occasionally, I cough. I have actually been attacked for coughing. Even when I tried to explain that I wasn't sick! A lady on the metro attacked me and told me to get the fuck off the train, an uber driver freaked out, violently pulled over and sprayed me with hand sanitizer, (Which, standard hand sanitizer causes a violent reacting for me where my skin literally feels like it's on fire for the next day to 3 days. I actually threatened to sue uber for that.), a guy in the grocery store went ballistic on me!
So yes, I feel like a pariah, I no longer have a job to go too, I am expected to work miracles for my students from behind my computer....and on top of that, I'm really worried about my mom. She's 69 and in good health but this stuff hits the elderly and that just worries me.
So my current mental state is "AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHH!!!!" I had an actual panic attack the other night, like, hyperventilating and all. I'm ok now but I haven't had one of those in years. I won't talk about some of the more personal stresses at home that make things all the worse, but suffice it to say, Fuck this. Honestly fuck this!
Ok, rant over. If you took the time to read this, thank you. If you are dealing right now and want to share, I would be glad to talk. I think during this time we need to move in, not away. Someone told me that they were thinking of it as physical distancing, not social distancing, because now more than ever, we need to look out for each other. I hope you abd yours are well and making it through these troubling times. There will be art and content to come soon. Stay safe and well.
I've considered getting a shirt that says "It's allergies, not a virus", but I don't know if people would believe it even if they bothered to read it.
So far I've been okay in most regards but I do hope this doesn't last very long.