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Please read, is kind of important
5 years ago
Hey there; I thought I'd wait it out and see what happens before I came back here... but it's looking like I can't do that.
First, why I've been gone so long:
ORIGINALLY it was due to stress/depression from all the crap happening all over the US (i.e. between viruses and riots, not great), and things just kept escalating more and more...
I was planning on coming back soon; however about 2 weeks ago now, the entire ceiling in the top floor of our house fell in. Our insurance isn't paying a cent on it, because of course they aren't; and we've been living in a hotel since it happened (and will continue to do so for... I don't know how long).
Sooooo the fear of potentially being homeless aside, I've barely been able to draw at all due to being in a single room with my parent... constantly. With no privacy whatsoever. So drawing is very very difficult, and I haven't even done anything recently aside from (so far only SFW) requests for my patrons, and a few pencil drawing of my own.
It's taking everything I've got to even try and keep my Patreon going; and my day job just makes it harder because I keep getting asked to come in all the time... To which I almost always say yes, because as much as I loathe my job I don't want to put more work on my coworkers... So.. that sucks. Xp
(honestly my job stresses me more than the whole thing with my house).
Long story short, due to 2020 doing everything it can to make the world a living hell, I am unsure when I will be back, or when I will be able to do any commissions (this is assuming anyone still wants what they asked for, because they've been backlogged for almost a year at this point).
For now, goodbye.
And don't worry about me too much..! I'm starting to get used to everything going wrong, so have been getting less and less depressed every time something else happens ^^
(Although I will admit; while depression isn't "too" much of an issue now; stress is very much. I'm so damn tired of this year. Both physically and mentally).
Fingers crossed that 2021 isn't also cursed..! ^^;
First, why I've been gone so long:
ORIGINALLY it was due to stress/depression from all the crap happening all over the US (i.e. between viruses and riots, not great), and things just kept escalating more and more...
I was planning on coming back soon; however about 2 weeks ago now, the entire ceiling in the top floor of our house fell in. Our insurance isn't paying a cent on it, because of course they aren't; and we've been living in a hotel since it happened (and will continue to do so for... I don't know how long).
Sooooo the fear of potentially being homeless aside, I've barely been able to draw at all due to being in a single room with my parent... constantly. With no privacy whatsoever. So drawing is very very difficult, and I haven't even done anything recently aside from (so far only SFW) requests for my patrons, and a few pencil drawing of my own.
It's taking everything I've got to even try and keep my Patreon going; and my day job just makes it harder because I keep getting asked to come in all the time... To which I almost always say yes, because as much as I loathe my job I don't want to put more work on my coworkers... So.. that sucks. Xp
(honestly my job stresses me more than the whole thing with my house).
Long story short, due to 2020 doing everything it can to make the world a living hell, I am unsure when I will be back, or when I will be able to do any commissions (this is assuming anyone still wants what they asked for, because they've been backlogged for almost a year at this point).
For now, goodbye.
And don't worry about me too much..! I'm starting to get used to everything going wrong, so have been getting less and less depressed every time something else happens ^^
(Although I will admit; while depression isn't "too" much of an issue now; stress is very much. I'm so damn tired of this year. Both physically and mentally).
Fingers crossed that 2021 isn't also cursed..! ^^;
If you would like to help support me, see most of my work early, and have access to patreon only content; you can find me here:
Shadowponi's Patreon 
Really sucks your insurance isn't paying for anything. Do you happen to know what might've caused the ceiling to fall in? I'm sure it was nothing of your fault or your family's fault. If you look into the cause of it you could potentially look into a lawsuit. https://www.valuepenguin.com/disput.....ttlement-offer here's something I found that may help.
And yeah, have been doing what I can to escape work.. I should maybe look into donating plasma again, as I have done that before... Just need to find time is the issue.
As for door dash/uber eats, I would first need my own car.. ><;;;
Thank you for the suggestions, still!! ^^
As for that, no we really can't say for sure what caused it. Insurance said it was due to the glue used when the house was built being recalled years ago (or maybe the fact that when the house was built, it was acceptable to use nails to hold up ceilings, rather than screws.. )
We did actually find a company that helps in these situations, which is good...
Though I'm not going to go into detail with it until things actually start happening, both because I'm incredibly skeptical about everything at this point, aaand I don't want to jynx it. ><
Just try to take things slow and easy, don't let the stress get to you. I know it's probably hard but being stressed isn't gonna make the issue go away, nor will it make it better.
If the glue was an issue then that shouldn't be on you, it's not your fault or your family's fault the house was built poorly. You should fight it! Fight the insurance company. Most are notorious for not paying anything when they really should. It's a really dumb strategy they use.
Wishing you the best of luck!
If you have a discord, pm me your tag and i'll send you a list of mental health things i've accumulated over the years.
Aside from watching how long it is before I completely lose my sanity (at which point idk wat happens, never gone to zero before), I'm actually doing quite well.
Soooo many thing have gone wrong that I just... Like, I'm really pissed off at the universe for it, but I also know I can do nothing to stop it.
For example, three days ago I woke up and my phone screen just started dying or no reason, so I had to order a new phone. Not ten minutes later wok called with schedule changes, and I'm barely on for 2-3 weeks.. which would usually be amazing..! Had I not just had to buy a new phone.
Also same day I checked my email only to find that Amazon said my account was hacked (it was not, hey flagged my phone order as suspicious), and cancelled my order.
Aaaalso same day, I got to work, only to find out the store owner changed even more of the schedule the day before... WITHOUT TELLING ANYONE. SO I didn't even work the day I thought.
The day after that, I had to stay at work late because something messed up with a coworkers car; which in itself wasn't too bad. However that same day while I was at work, the elevator at our hotel broke down... and the only person in it was my parent, who is claustrophobic and was trapped inside said elevator for 30+ minutes.
Aaaaand then a few hours after THAT, we got a call saying our priest die that afternoon from a massive heart attack out of nowhere.
All of this was only in the span of 2 DAYS.
If it was spread out more... sure, fine, whatever; things happen. But it's like every terrible thing that could go wrong is condensing itself into as few days as possible :/
Like, I am legitimately beginning to believe we've been cursed or hexed or something, because the amount of things that have gone wrong... I can't even say they're coincidental anymore.
But yes.
Even with all of that, we're holding up alright. Just my sanity rests at around 25% - 30% now ^^;;;
just a reminder im here if hugs are required.
And thank you again; really appreciate that *nuzz*
Sanity noooot doing well at all; but otherwise am taking things surprisingly well. And thank you!
Really hoping next year is just all around better for everyone...
2020 is just overall cursed X/
And I'm sorry to hear that... hope you and your family are able to get through that..
And thank you
Wishing you the absolute best, and hoping you're able to get your house sorted out!
And thank you; we're still working on that..~
and aye, here's hoping everything works out for the best ^^ And hopefully it won't take too long to get sorted!
Also I'm actually not depressed now.
Stressed as all hell and on the verge of losing my sanity, but not depressed. Aside from that, am holding up surprisingly well, aside from the burning rage at the universe, haha~
And thank ya ^^
In any case, really hoping next year is better for everyone, too..
Thank you; and I really hope your grandmother was right... this year has 100% been a living hell; for pretty much everyone. ><
Fingers crossed next year is good..!
And thanks again; I'm doing surprisingly well, aside from almost being out of sanity. Just would like fore everything that's been going wrong to... spread out more, instead of condensing into as few days as possible; which... well I said pretty much everything in another comment above you. ^^;
Like, things have been going so wrong that it's not even coincidental anymore.
And I am~
Losing my sanity more and more every day; but other than that, I'm clinging to the hope that next year will be much, much better for everyone
Just losing sanity, but I'm not quite at zero yet, so it's good enough for now ^^;
*hug*
Thanks, Christy; doing what I can in that regard~
Actually doing fairly well (albeit slowly going more and more insane.. but I will gladly take insanity over depression ^^;; )
*squeeze* I'm glad you're doing better~ Keep strong <3
Hope things go better for ya next year!
And thank you; I just hope next year gets better for everyone overall ><;