A lotta 'shit' hit the fan, and I don't know WHY in anyone's name I'm posting this here, as I'm not known or anything. But I have to write it somewhere. I will NEVER draw again, as I was starting to draw again, taking small commissions, etc. just for a little money so i can... 'go to the dream.' But the person I was supposed to go with? *shakes head* betrayed me. and you want the honest truth? I want the person back. But I don't want that person back because I said anything. I want this person back because the person WANTS to.

My mental health and physical health deteriorated to *shit* because of all the things I've been doing FOR this person. Just for money, or advancements so I can BE with this person.

It was for *nothing.* This person thought I had 'abandoned' her/him. What a load of flying. bull. shit. I sweat. I bled. I mother fucking cried for this person. I helped this person, with all of my abilities that I could have. Where did that lead me?


Nowhere. I want to be with this person. I never confessed it I'm afraid, and this person knew it, and never picked up on the many obvious hints that isn't blatantly telling him/her.

So the person dumps me.


The end. Finis. I tore up I think a possible $500 worth of commissions, and scattered them in the wind outside my house. I will never draw again.