I'm going to be logging off any and all social sites for the rest of the year, and possibly a week afterwards. I have too many emotions and things that I have to set straight, as they've been getting out of hand. My jealousy from seeing gift art given to people I know and from people I know for others has been getting to me immensely. I know people are free to draw stuff for whatever and whomever they choose to, but when I see gifts getting exchanged amongst my friends left and right and gifts from people that I wish I could interact with for my friends, it all makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong and that im unwanted, like I'm just sitting in a cold, damp corner meanwhile everyone else is in a giant hot tub with enough space to accommodate new people except myself. This feeling started to become a lot more intense as my birthday rolled around and I only got one drawing from a friend as a gift, meanwhile said friend got so many more drawings, many of which even popped up on my feed here, leaving me with a sour taste in my mouth.

I know im coming off as incredibly selfish and ungrateful, but thats the problem I have with trying to talk about jealousy in any shape or form: I sound like an ungrateful brat who just wants more and more. I just wish people would draw me stuff, without the need for a special occasion like my birthday to do so. I dont know what it is I can do to get people more interested in me, I just feel lost, and I feel like I need to be alone for a while to sort things out.

And with that, ill be signing off for the last time of the year. I feel terrible writing this on Christmas day, a day about giving and thankfulness, but I can't keep this bottled up any longer.

By the time you all read this, I'll have logged off

Till next year

-Snowball