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Thoughts on the New Year
4 years ago
<Insert witty banter here>
Kind of a ranty journal ahead, so feel free to ignore this and move on, if you'd rather not listen to someone vent for a bit.
Now that that's out of the way, I'm sorry I haven't been around. I've been exhausted with school, constantly pressing my nose to that grindstone. I've been constantly busting my ass to pull good grades in the middle of a pandemic, and I've been burning myself down with it. I know it's for my betterment, but there are times when it becomes too much to handle. Between school, the pandemic, losing two family members to Covid, and all the drama that a certain individual has been putting this country through, I've had to start talking to my therapist about potentially going on antidepressants. I haven't needed them in years, but I'm finding it harder to keep a handle on things--particularly with how willfully ignorant people enjoy being. I see so many people blindly repeating conspiracy theories or chiming "fraud" without putting objective thought into the matter. They simply go find biased websites that support their twisted worldview and then tout these as fact, even if they've been debunked. This is particularly frustrating, as university has taught me to examine my sources and think about them objectively to determine whether they are factual. Now, I'm to the point where people I used to respect utterly disgust me, because they buy into this madness and refuse to listen to anyone else that threatens to damage their bubble of ignorance (and, let's call it what it is, stupidity).
At this point, I've mostly been needing a break. I'm glad for Winter being here, as I get a few weeks between semesters, with an added week due to our campus rearranging Spring Break. I'm sure I'll feel that later in the semester, but there's little to be done about it. Really, at this point, I'm hoping against hope that 2021 will bring about at least the beginning of something resembling peace. I know too many idiots will still be spazzing out like a bunch of drunken monkeys, telling themselves they're the only "real Americans" because they support a petulant manchild that works to destroy them while brainwashing them into thinking he's their hero. But I can hope that, as we move forward, many will come to realize they were being played for the fools they are. I can't say I'm overly optimistic (the old adage about leading a horse to water but not being able to make it drink comes to mind), but that's all I can do now: hope.
Already, vaccines are beginning to roll out to people, and I'm immensely glad to see numerous labs across the world work together. Much as I would love to say "Well, we can be back to normal within a few months now," I've studied enough biology to know otherwise. Plus, even with the vaccines, I'm fully aware there will be a bunch of nutjobs that refuse the vaccine, either under the delusion that the entire Covid thing was a hoax or the typical "nuuu, vaccines bad!!" mentality.
At this point, all I can do is sigh, shake my head, and do what I can to move forward and make a better life for myself. Here's hoping that 2021 will give more opportunities to do so--not just for me, but for everyone.
Anyway, sorry for the journal getting so heavy (and political). I'd suggest taking refuge in the comment section, but I'm sure there will be someone down there, getting butt-hurt that I dared speak out against their master. :P We'll see if they have the self-awareness to realize that they're proving me right, and all of us can have a good laugh. Then again, I'm just a small fish in a big pond. They might not even see this journal and just go about their lives none the wiser. Either way, have a Happy New Year, everyone (and a very belated Merry Christmas)!
Now that that's out of the way, I'm sorry I haven't been around. I've been exhausted with school, constantly pressing my nose to that grindstone. I've been constantly busting my ass to pull good grades in the middle of a pandemic, and I've been burning myself down with it. I know it's for my betterment, but there are times when it becomes too much to handle. Between school, the pandemic, losing two family members to Covid, and all the drama that a certain individual has been putting this country through, I've had to start talking to my therapist about potentially going on antidepressants. I haven't needed them in years, but I'm finding it harder to keep a handle on things--particularly with how willfully ignorant people enjoy being. I see so many people blindly repeating conspiracy theories or chiming "fraud" without putting objective thought into the matter. They simply go find biased websites that support their twisted worldview and then tout these as fact, even if they've been debunked. This is particularly frustrating, as university has taught me to examine my sources and think about them objectively to determine whether they are factual. Now, I'm to the point where people I used to respect utterly disgust me, because they buy into this madness and refuse to listen to anyone else that threatens to damage their bubble of ignorance (and, let's call it what it is, stupidity).
At this point, I've mostly been needing a break. I'm glad for Winter being here, as I get a few weeks between semesters, with an added week due to our campus rearranging Spring Break. I'm sure I'll feel that later in the semester, but there's little to be done about it. Really, at this point, I'm hoping against hope that 2021 will bring about at least the beginning of something resembling peace. I know too many idiots will still be spazzing out like a bunch of drunken monkeys, telling themselves they're the only "real Americans" because they support a petulant manchild that works to destroy them while brainwashing them into thinking he's their hero. But I can hope that, as we move forward, many will come to realize they were being played for the fools they are. I can't say I'm overly optimistic (the old adage about leading a horse to water but not being able to make it drink comes to mind), but that's all I can do now: hope.
Already, vaccines are beginning to roll out to people, and I'm immensely glad to see numerous labs across the world work together. Much as I would love to say "Well, we can be back to normal within a few months now," I've studied enough biology to know otherwise. Plus, even with the vaccines, I'm fully aware there will be a bunch of nutjobs that refuse the vaccine, either under the delusion that the entire Covid thing was a hoax or the typical "nuuu, vaccines bad!!" mentality.
At this point, all I can do is sigh, shake my head, and do what I can to move forward and make a better life for myself. Here's hoping that 2021 will give more opportunities to do so--not just for me, but for everyone.
Anyway, sorry for the journal getting so heavy (and political). I'd suggest taking refuge in the comment section, but I'm sure there will be someone down there, getting butt-hurt that I dared speak out against their master. :P We'll see if they have the self-awareness to realize that they're proving me right, and all of us can have a good laugh. Then again, I'm just a small fish in a big pond. They might not even see this journal and just go about their lives none the wiser. Either way, have a Happy New Year, everyone (and a very belated Merry Christmas)!
Yeah, I understand the sentiment...sort of locked myself into an argument with Zeus and Sargif. But someone needs to speak out the truth.
As for the rest...I am much the same as you, hoping for the best, preparing for the worst, seeing where they meet in the middle, and above all knowing this isn't going to be over anytime soon, even after the 20th. I've had to cut a lot of people out of my life because of all this, including the ones mentioned above, but sadly I've found it really wasn't that much of a loss. But I know others were much closer to them... I'm just glad nobody really close to me has fallen into this insane cesspool of insecurity, anger, hate, brainwashing, and self-delusion.
Here's to better times ahead before the year ends, I hope. And I do look forward to when you and I can speak again.