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4 years ago
Hi, folks.
If you haven't noticed, uploads have come to an halt for a while now.
People who know me personally are aware I actually have several pics I haven't uploaded yet, so it's not just the usual "creativity shows up occasionally then goes away" due to chronic anxiety.
So what is happening? Well, these last months haven't been kind. While medical tests say I have no visible physical damage to the brain, heart, intestines, and bones, that means I'm back to square one, though the neurologist said anxiety can actually seriously fuck your body up by making your brain go haywire enough, so I guess only medication and trying to try to convince my brain it's working the wrong way.
It's not just that either.
My mother's boyfriend started to act weirdly and it was found his cerebrospinal fluid was not being pumped properly, causing him to develop early signs of dementia (which was bringing bad memories of how my father eventually passed away) and it seems either the surgery was botched or it takes a lot of times to heal, because he's gotten worse, doing and saying weird stuff and pretty much randomly living in a different reality. It's taxing for my mother and by extension me, even if I don't live there anymore.
Then, there is our old cat who was growing very weak and unable to move correctly to feed himself. It was most likely a neurological infection that has been going on for years after we were forced to have his tail removed following an incident we never know was. While painkillers were helping him feeling much better, they were getting less and less effective while his condition when they weren't kicking in was worsening. While he managed to go through Xmas and the New Year, it was still emotionally draining for weeks, to see him get better, only to relapse few days later before getting another shot.
In the end, on Monday 4th, mom decided to put him to sleep just as we discussed before, to end his suffering.
Needless to say, all those events have pretty much killed my mood. If you've noticed me not chatting much recently, that's why.
Nothing else to say, except I'm gonna need some time for myself as one can imagine.
Oh and the cherry on top is I started playing Nier Automata and while it's awesome, it's definitely not helping the mood.
Thank you for reading.
If you haven't noticed, uploads have come to an halt for a while now.
People who know me personally are aware I actually have several pics I haven't uploaded yet, so it's not just the usual "creativity shows up occasionally then goes away" due to chronic anxiety.
So what is happening? Well, these last months haven't been kind. While medical tests say I have no visible physical damage to the brain, heart, intestines, and bones, that means I'm back to square one, though the neurologist said anxiety can actually seriously fuck your body up by making your brain go haywire enough, so I guess only medication and trying to try to convince my brain it's working the wrong way.
It's not just that either.
My mother's boyfriend started to act weirdly and it was found his cerebrospinal fluid was not being pumped properly, causing him to develop early signs of dementia (which was bringing bad memories of how my father eventually passed away) and it seems either the surgery was botched or it takes a lot of times to heal, because he's gotten worse, doing and saying weird stuff and pretty much randomly living in a different reality. It's taxing for my mother and by extension me, even if I don't live there anymore.
Then, there is our old cat who was growing very weak and unable to move correctly to feed himself. It was most likely a neurological infection that has been going on for years after we were forced to have his tail removed following an incident we never know was. While painkillers were helping him feeling much better, they were getting less and less effective while his condition when they weren't kicking in was worsening. While he managed to go through Xmas and the New Year, it was still emotionally draining for weeks, to see him get better, only to relapse few days later before getting another shot.
In the end, on Monday 4th, mom decided to put him to sleep just as we discussed before, to end his suffering.
Needless to say, all those events have pretty much killed my mood. If you've noticed me not chatting much recently, that's why.
Nothing else to say, except I'm gonna need some time for myself as one can imagine.
Oh and the cherry on top is I started playing Nier Automata and while it's awesome, it's definitely not helping the mood.
Thank you for reading.
Commissions in progress (date commissioned) (progress):
-
ne0n-bandicoot Zenobia & Nova (12/30/2019) (concept sketch)In plans:
-More of Scoria
... holly shit, Nier Automata was not a good option -w-;; i mean, the game is awesome, but... at first, you play it for the good looking ass, but you end up in a puddle of tears xD