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...Exhaustion
4 years ago
I know this is not the right place for this type of text: but whatever .. I
t's been 2 weeks since I was kicked out of the house and I'm trying to keep going as best as I can, but to be honest I'm tired and feeling like useless.
Things have been difficult these last few times, I feel that my artistic performance has been declining, I am not very satisfied with my drawings, a terrible discouragement has caught me in the last few days and to make my situation worse I lost my medical plan and No I can afford psychological treatment without it.
A feeling of hopelessness and apathy has consumed me and removed me from people who only want my good and I see it.
The only certainty I have is that one day everyone will get tired of me and probably move on with their lives (and I don't blame them because I know how exhausting it is to deal with people with low self-esteem, depression and anxiety) while I'm left behind lost. .
This feeling of frustration is terrible, this mania of self-sabotage and of seeing that I am not enough for anyone, including me, ends with me.
I feel like a burden that continues to disrupt people's lives and disappoint everyone around me.
One side of my head crucifies me because I am not being strong enough to endure, and the other says that, whatever I do, I will never come out of that loop.
but as I said at the beginning .... I AM EXHAUSTED
Anyway, I don't know where I'm going with this ..
thanks for reading
t's been 2 weeks since I was kicked out of the house and I'm trying to keep going as best as I can, but to be honest I'm tired and feeling like useless.
Things have been difficult these last few times, I feel that my artistic performance has been declining, I am not very satisfied with my drawings, a terrible discouragement has caught me in the last few days and to make my situation worse I lost my medical plan and No I can afford psychological treatment without it.
A feeling of hopelessness and apathy has consumed me and removed me from people who only want my good and I see it.
The only certainty I have is that one day everyone will get tired of me and probably move on with their lives (and I don't blame them because I know how exhausting it is to deal with people with low self-esteem, depression and anxiety) while I'm left behind lost. .
This feeling of frustration is terrible, this mania of self-sabotage and of seeing that I am not enough for anyone, including me, ends with me.
I feel like a burden that continues to disrupt people's lives and disappoint everyone around me.
One side of my head crucifies me because I am not being strong enough to endure, and the other says that, whatever I do, I will never come out of that loop.
but as I said at the beginning .... I AM EXHAUSTED
Anyway, I don't know where I'm going with this ..
thanks for reading
It is not something that can just be remedied with the flick of a switch, unfortunately. But you are no burden; you are a capable artist and good individual. It’s tough going sometimes, but for my behalf, I’m rooting for you. Take things one step at a time, and know there’s people who care even when the light seems darkest.