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Internet Manners and Behavior
16 years ago
General
NaNo Novel: Here Falls The Thunder
After some discussion with a new friend of mine, we poured over some of the finer details the kinds of behaviors and attitude people display while online, especially in large group settings like MUCKS, MUSHES, or even SL. What we noticed is a trend in the behaviors of others. I'll list the two most popular ones here, and why they're NOT even remotely close to the best method:
1) The Silent Treatment: This is perhaps the most egregious and annoying of all online behaviors. Silent Treatment occurs when a person attempts to show they aren't interested in interacting with you by refusing to acknowledge your existence. They have the absurdly misguided belief that by simply ignoring your comments or remarks, that they are effectively communicating a lack of desire.
They could NOT be more wrong. Not speaking does absolutely nothing to dissuade that individual. Why? There could be any number of reasons why that person isn't talking to you, and perhaps the last one on the list would be "Because I don't want to talk to you." Also, when you persist in attempting to communicate, said person will often react with anger or annoyance that you "didn't get the message", which will often result in being put on an ignore list, or threatened with action by the admins for harassment.
What. The. Hell? Is it too much trouble to simply TELL someone you aren't interested, to just say "Thanks, but no thanks?" And if the person IS genuinely harassing you, THEN put them on ignore! I've had more than a few people claim they don't want to use to ignore list, preferring to resort to Silent Treatment or threats of Admin action. Really, if you can't do something as simple as say 'no', like you would in real-life? Then you shouldn't be online.
2) "Disconnect": Another egregious behavior, is when people will DC on you for absolutely no reason, often in the middle of a conversation, or an RP, or something, right after talking to you. Now, before anyone gets angry, I am aware that some people do DC legitimately, because of poor connections or something caused them to disconnect (folks pick up the phone, signal interference from over devices in the home, etc). However, if you KNOW your connection is spotty or otherwise less than stellar, you SHOULD let people know.
Who I'm talking about are the people who decide that they're no longer interested in conversing or RPing with you, and DC as a means of escape. Honestly, that's rude beyond all knowing. You leave a person hanging, often without any idea of whether they did something wrong, or if your DC was a legit loss of signal. Most people I've talked to say that DC'ing is the easiest, most guilt-free method of escape, citing that they do not wish to tell the person they don't wish to continue, or that they aren't interested anymore.
Uh, no. That's rude in the best sense of the word. You should never just quit because you don't want to talk to the person or be around them anymore. Unless you have a really good reason (stepping away from the computer, lost signal), you shouldn't just drop them. For one thing, it doesn't help them, and two, if they find you later (very likely) you'll have to explain yourself. And lying is not a fun thing to do. So really, just be honest with the person. It's like critiquing an artist. If you wish for them to improve, you need to let them know what's wrong.
Anyway, short list I know :P But I just thought I'd let off a little steam~
1) The Silent Treatment: This is perhaps the most egregious and annoying of all online behaviors. Silent Treatment occurs when a person attempts to show they aren't interested in interacting with you by refusing to acknowledge your existence. They have the absurdly misguided belief that by simply ignoring your comments or remarks, that they are effectively communicating a lack of desire.
They could NOT be more wrong. Not speaking does absolutely nothing to dissuade that individual. Why? There could be any number of reasons why that person isn't talking to you, and perhaps the last one on the list would be "Because I don't want to talk to you." Also, when you persist in attempting to communicate, said person will often react with anger or annoyance that you "didn't get the message", which will often result in being put on an ignore list, or threatened with action by the admins for harassment.
What. The. Hell? Is it too much trouble to simply TELL someone you aren't interested, to just say "Thanks, but no thanks?" And if the person IS genuinely harassing you, THEN put them on ignore! I've had more than a few people claim they don't want to use to ignore list, preferring to resort to Silent Treatment or threats of Admin action. Really, if you can't do something as simple as say 'no', like you would in real-life? Then you shouldn't be online.
2) "Disconnect": Another egregious behavior, is when people will DC on you for absolutely no reason, often in the middle of a conversation, or an RP, or something, right after talking to you. Now, before anyone gets angry, I am aware that some people do DC legitimately, because of poor connections or something caused them to disconnect (folks pick up the phone, signal interference from over devices in the home, etc). However, if you KNOW your connection is spotty or otherwise less than stellar, you SHOULD let people know.
Who I'm talking about are the people who decide that they're no longer interested in conversing or RPing with you, and DC as a means of escape. Honestly, that's rude beyond all knowing. You leave a person hanging, often without any idea of whether they did something wrong, or if your DC was a legit loss of signal. Most people I've talked to say that DC'ing is the easiest, most guilt-free method of escape, citing that they do not wish to tell the person they don't wish to continue, or that they aren't interested anymore.
Uh, no. That's rude in the best sense of the word. You should never just quit because you don't want to talk to the person or be around them anymore. Unless you have a really good reason (stepping away from the computer, lost signal), you shouldn't just drop them. For one thing, it doesn't help them, and two, if they find you later (very likely) you'll have to explain yourself. And lying is not a fun thing to do. So really, just be honest with the person. It's like critiquing an artist. If you wish for them to improve, you need to let them know what's wrong.
Anyway, short list I know :P But I just thought I'd let off a little steam~
Ignoring people can work, but yeah, ruuuude. I won't even do that. Words work, believe me! :D
Recently I was discussing politics with someone, and I made a statement about things I'd gotten sick of seeing from his political party as of late. He got all offended that I pointed out what seemed to be a trend to me, and he was like "Bye, you're being irrational" because he himself lacked the ability to deal objectively with the situation. He said he didn't want to deal with me when I was like that. I pondered over what kind of friend ignores you when your mood isn't all sunshine and lollipops (not that I was in a bad mood, as I explained just now).