In 2016 I told myself I would go to college for animation at SCAD. If I'm honest I think I chose this because I didn't think I could actually become anything that wasn't some art cog in a machine. Almost 5 years later and hsving graduated a year I have finally realized a cold truth. I don't know how to tell a story anymore. Not one that isn't tied up in being fanfic but the names have changed. I pitch myself as a concept artist but can't make characters or stories. It's all just themes at best.
I am in a debt so deep it keeps me chained in a abusive household and I can't do the thing I went to school for. I can't make anything I want anymore. I can't find a way to make it work and I have to make it work otherwise what was the point. My dad used his retirement fund so I could finish and I can't do something so basic. Even when I put in hours and hours of work I know deep down it's lifeless. It's empty and dull. I hate it. I hate it so much.
I wish I had never gone to college