...counter 'an uncalled-for' hypnosis attempt:

1. 'Invite' hypnotist to hypnotize you. (Just bring it, fool!)

2a. If hypnotist attempts to hypnotize you with his dinky little watch, snatch it immediately and smash it over his head.

2b. If hypnotist attempts to hypnotize you by staring in your eyes (like Kaa from Jungle Book), poke them with your fingers and smash a clock over his head. Another alternative is to draw a mirror on the rapi- hypnotist. Once hypnotist attempt backfire, smash mirror on said's head.

3. Walk away from KO'ed hypnotist and pretend nothing ever happened. Another alternative is to place a bottle of vodka/beer/chivas near hypnotist and scribble 'Hanged-over' on hypnotist head.

All my submissions have just disappeared, just like a David Copperfield act!

Should I care?

Lulz indeed... :P

Dunno how long I'll last here, so if I were to go off with a bang I would personally love to have this as my theme song:

*****

Perform this Way - Weird al Yankovic

My mama told me when I was hatched
Act like a superstar
Save your allowance, buy a bubble dress
And someday you will go far
Now on red carpets, well, I'm hard to miss
The press follows everywhere I go
I'll poke your eye out with a dress like this
Back off and enjoy the show!

I'm sure my critics will say it's a grotesque display
Well, they can bite me, baby -- I perform this way
I might be wearin' Swiss cheese or maybe covered with bees
It doesn't mean I'm crazy -- I perform this way

Ooo, my little monsters pay... lots 'cause I perform this way
Baby, I perform this way
Ooo, don't worry, I'm okay... hey, I just perform this way
I'm not crazy, I perform this way

I'll be a troll or evil queen
I'll be a human jelly bean
'Cause every day is Halloween
For me...

I'm so completely original
My new look is all the rage
I'll wrap my small intestines 'round my neck
And set fire to myself on stage
I'll wear a porcupine on my head
On a W-H-I-M
And for no reason now I'll sing in French
Excusez-moi, Qui a pété? (Who cut the cheese?)

Got my straight jacket today, it's made of gold lamé
No, not because I'm crazy - I perform this way
I strap prime rib to my feet, cover myself with raw meat
I'll bet you've never seen a skirt steak worn this way

Don't be offended when you see
My latest pop monstrosity
I'm strange, weird, shocking, odd, bizarre
I'm Frankenstein, I'm Avatar
There's nothing too embarrassing
I'll honestly do anything
But wear white after Labor Day
'Cause baby, I perform this way

Hope you won't think it's cliché if I go nude today
Don't call the cops now, baby, I perform this way
No reason I should regret all the attention I get
I'm not completely crazy, I perform this way, yeah

I perform this way-hey, I perform this way-hey
I'm always deviating from the norm this way-hey
I perform this way-hey, I perform this way-hey
I'm really not insane -- I just perform this way-hey


Proof of its existence: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocmydg56uPs

Ciao!

PS: Metaphor rocks!!!

Rest assured, all my mature contents are very laughable.

Please move along.