Well, here we are again, talking about the same shit I spoke about 3 years ago, on something stupid I had done 5 years ago. Here's the journal:

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9514768/

This is, once again, being brought up to me. I said the N word. I didn't call someone the N word, but I used the N word, quoting my Uncle, an 80 year old man who has since, passed away. It was a very poor attempt at trying to convey my feelings on the right of free speech. That, and the combination spending my whole life, being told I'm too fat and disgusting to EVER have anybody care about me, left me growing up with no friends, no self-esteem, and no significant other, left me so desperately wanting to fit in, anywhere, that I was willing to say a word which should, honestly, never be used. It was the single lowest point in my life, and I never want to return to it.

That being said... what was the fucking point? It's not who I am, and it's never who I was, but what is the point, if every couple of years, it just gets thrown back in your face, so a new batch of friends can pretty much go "oh, fuck that guy." I think the ones that hurt the most, are not the ones that just up and block you without a word, or even DM you that you're a piece of shit before blocking you, but the ones that tell you, "If I had known about this before I met you, I would have just told you to fuck off right then." So basically, you're telling me there was never a chance to atone. You might as well have just said to fuck off anyways, instead of reminding them of the lowest point in the life, and making them feel even lower. So now, you just have everyone blocking you, or banning you, or not really wanting to talk to you anymore. So now, you leave one way behind, only for the way forward to be slammed shut in your face, again and again, leaving you alone, all because you desperately wanted.... to not feel alone.

So, after some thought, I decided instead of just getting random generic furries hulking out, I would offer everyone the chance to go green.

So, basic overview of how this works. simply post a link to your OC in the comments below. If I find them interesting enough, I will send you a note. Basically, your OC, will be turned buff(buffer) and green, being transformed by my kangaroo, in some form of sexual nature, in and adult art, that I will be paying for. If you have a preference for HOW they are changed, that can be discussed AFTER I note you. Same thing if you have a specific artist you want to recommend. For the most part though, I will find an appropriate artist. This is NOT a contest, so to speak, so if something shows up in my gallery, with someone else's OC being hulked out, that doesn't mean I won't note you. There is no deadline, so feel free to comment whenever, and there's no guarantee of when I would decide to note you.

It doesn't have to be your sona, specifically, just as long as the character belongs to you.

Any species is welcome to try, but I do have a list of preferences, meaning these have a better chance of being selected first.
Lion
Tiger
Donkey
Kangaroo(yes, more roos are always welcome)
Cougar
Puma
Leopard
Jaguar
Dinosaur
Griffin
Wolf(if female. I already have a male wolf I get hulkouts of, sorry.)
Orca(might be interesting to see.)

Other things of note listed below:
Male or female only.
No multi-limb.(this includes your genitalia.)
If you're mostly, or completely green, I wouldn't bother, a hulkout would be fairly redundant. A little bit of green is still okay.
No ferals.

Think that about sums everything up.

One year dumber.

Now, before I get into this, I'm sure it's fine for you, and whatever you want to do with it, I don't know...

My point is this. It started out, as an artist, who shall remain nameless, who basically cleared out all his multiple FA accounts, and moved to strictly Twitter. I very much enjoyed this artist. But now, the only way I can keep up with said artist, is with a Twitter account, which I did make.

Eventually, other artists began moving to the 'only Twitter' bandwagon, so i also had to start following them to see anything they made.

Now, I'm not the kind of person, to log on, each day, and tell you how my day is going. I just don't. Now let's say said followed artist does a Twitter raffle. Fine, you wanna show fan appreciation, I can like, and retweet. God knows why, I don't have any followers to retweet it to.

So, my account basically just looks like a raffle account, because I don't want to tell the world how I'm doing, but still want to keep up with artists.

So now, you get these artists who start adding "no raffle accounts". Well, how do you know it's a raffle account, maybe the guy just isn't talkative? So basically, you're denying your fans at something, because they're socially awkward, which is frankly the biggest 'fuck you' you could give them, so.... good job!

Yes, I made the mistake of being stupid and edgy. Yes, I said a word I shouldn't have said. Yes., I have lost friends and been banned from multiple servers now without warning. Yes, perhaps I deserve it. No, I wasn't always like that, and yes, I'm trying not to be like that anymore.

For those not aware, some screenshots have come up from 2 years ago, and which I said some things that I regret. I will not post links. I will not name names. I will not call anybody out. This is simply a journal to give context of why I chose to be stupid. Does that excuse it? No.

I have been in the fandom, silently lurking for over 20 years. About 3 years ago, I had finally decided to interact with the fandom, and began joining discord servers. My interests and likes were varied. As such, I had joined servers where my interests did not align 100% with the rest of the server, which 4 out of 5 of the first servers I had ever joined, simply did not care. No one ever spoke to me, no one ever acknowledged me. I was just... there. So, I was looking for artists to commission, and found they had a discord server, and had decided "sure, why not?", so, I joined, and I talked to people. Yes, some of them said some bad things, but not all of them. Most of them were into a fetish that i was not into, but they were okay with that. They didn't shut me out just because my interests didn't align with theirs 100%. So, after being there for so long, I got into the habit of talking the way they do, and that was my mistake.

Again, this does not excuse me in any way. I just wanted to state WHY I made this mistake, and to apologize for it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qnug5_h6DJQ

Deep within the womb of time,
a creature thus be born
The seed of life is united with
the egg of tyranny
Gestates forth from within the womb of life
for three-quarter and nigh a year
The creature thus be born!
The creature thus be formed!

And every year raineth down the celebratory tears
A celebration of the yearsfrom mere mortal sky
And ye of years twenty seven bells will chime!
When the heavens open up
and drink from the silver cup
The creature thus be born!
And blow the magic horn!
To alert the spirit deep within the cycle of life.
The creature has begun it's journey deep forlorn,
upon this day which he be formed
In the sea of mucus the spirit rides down from the mountain
and unites with the creature in the womb
A holy union, dark mortality, until the dark mortality
breaks the chain of life
The creature thus be born






lol So.... it's my birthday today.

I know, I know... You probably look at it and think, "Aberdeen, you're an idiot! You don't even draw! It's like we're paying for your porn!" Well, true, it probably would just go to that, but that's not why it's open. I have my shinies open because I DO write, and I DO post it. It's not porn, so it's all on my  aberdeen82 account. I don't do commission writing, and my writing is just for me and my characters, but i figure if you enjoy reading about them as much as I enjoy writing about them, you can leave a tip. I don't have as many viewers on the other account, so it made more sense to just open this one.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!


lol yes, I'm old... time to break out the Super Poligrip!

Was hoping to upload a whole bunch of macro commissions today, but stuff doesn't pan out that way all the time. It happens. I do have a few things to upload today, and i should have the rest this month in time for macro March.

So, to the few that know me through telegram or discord, know that I am a shit talking asshole. Does this mean that I hate you? No, not really. It's simply who I am and what I do. It's not meant to be insulting and it's not meant to hurt you. It's simply meant to be a joke and not taken seriously. If this bothers you, that's fine, you don't have to know me. That being said, if you decide that you would like to reciprocate the trash talk, do not be angry. If I talk trash to you and you do not, in return, talk trash to me, feel free to voice your concerns. But, if there is a back and forth of mutual trash talking, do not get legit angry and tell me what a piece of shit I am, cause I have no issues with blocking people.

So, you probably can't tell, but I love macro. Just something about the concept of being a giant in a city. It's largely in part to  duncan

Anyways, I was just noticing that I've been seeing him a little more rampage-y lately, which, nothing wrong with that, but I feel like the purity of the big green roo is slightly tainted now. Like seeing Mickey Mouse strangle a hooker, or watching Bugs Bunny beat a homeless man to death with a baseball bat.

I want to give him a hug now... O_O

So, I was watching a stream the other day, and I saw a picture, don't wanna say who drew it, who it was for, or what it was, because it doesn't look posted, so I'd hate to spoil anything.
Anyways, the picture was a dead ringer for a character I thought up back when I was in my teens, a good 20 years ago. Hell of a coincidence, but it's happened before. So, as I was watching, I started getting misty-eyed. My stories were always private things, that live on in my head. Point is, this character was one that was always in my stories, then less often in my stories, and then, I stopped thinking about him at all. When I saw the picture, all these old memories came flooding back, and I started feeling sad, because I felt like I had just abandoned the character. Never decided to kill him off, he just kinda... faded away.

So, what I'm wondering is, is feeling an emotional attachment to something like this a normal thing? Have YOU ever felt that way about a character of yours? Feel free to post, I'd love to hear your opinion.

That is all.

Saw Mazinger Z: Infinity. Only showed for 2 days as an event. I thought it was fantastic. It covered my old nostalgia feelings growing up watching a giant robot blow shit up, while having an updated look to it. Not a whole lot of people there(5 including myself), which is sad, cause I wished more people knew of its existence. Anyways, had lots of fun. But it wasn't all good news. My tablet decided to reset to factory default after I turned it off in the theater. So now I get to fix that...

So, I've commissioned so many arts so far, that it's becoming hard to keep track of everything. So I thought, if an artist makes journals of their commissions progress, why don't I, as a commissioner, make one keeping track of everything I'm commissioning?

 f-ss paid, complete
 Silentknightowl paid. Rough sketch
 kheel paid, complete
 nightshardfgb10 paid, not started, doubt they ever will.
 iudicium86 paid, coloring
 necroizu paid, rough sketch
 kevindragon 2x arts, paid, complete
 brokenvocaloid scam artist, avoid like plague.
 aereous paid, complete
 agon_wolfe paid, complete
 arekusuwulf paid, complete
 dariusleogator bust, paid, not started. 3 character commission, paid, not started. 3 stage sequence, paid, 1 stage lined
 Modem_redpill 2x sketches, paid, complete
 blazekemono 4 page comic, paid, colored
 selezneva 12 page comic, paid, complete
 daru_brek 2x 3 stage sequence, paid, complete
 marsel-defender paid, complete
 whitecolt_productions paid, complete
 goodmoon paid, complete
 otherwords paid, not started