I find myself single, again, after 2 years. It's always weird to be in this position. I have always been in long term relationships and when they end it's very much like waking up from a long dream. I'm a little disoriented and I'm not sure where I am or what I should be doing, really. And it takes so much out of me. This one was worse because we started out as BFFs and I really felt like we connected on a deeper level. Plus, we were actually married.
I'm not saying that we're not both better people from the split (it definitely was time to end that relationship because it was getting really destructive) but it's still very difficult to know where to start again.
I've been both extremely relieved and extremely sad.

I've been going through a lot of personal discovery the past few months. Actually, I think more than being about "discovery" it has been about coming to a place of accepting what I've already known most of my life. I've wanted to talk about it and hear myself say it out loud but my lifestyle doesn't exactly allow for such a bold move. But I'll talk about it here because I feel like it's safe to talk about it in this outlet, as most of us don't fit inside any sort of a traditional mold. I'm gay. Uh. Bisexual? Pansexual? I'm not clear on all of the terms. But I am definitely attracted to females stronger than most attractions to other persons. And I'm in a heterosexual marriage to a man who is at least bisexual.

I feel like I should grow a backbone but I don't really know how.

This might be my first journal entry..
It's interesting how I'm not on FA very regularly at all but then when I'm genuinely interested in it for something furry related..it's down for a week. :3
Oh, FA, let us never take you for granted again.