Wolfgang429 bought some bird calls last week and they just came in!! I kept the Robin and Bluebird for my future fursuit :3 *chirps and dances around* Literally!

This isn’t English class, so I’m not going to try and sound like the novelist that I know I’m not. So! To get into my upmost mind-bending state of… well mind, I have chosen to talk about some things I think about when my mind is not preoccupied by others. Ten things to be exact. There’s really no ranking among the things I think about so don’t go thinking ones more important than the other. Ight, let’s do this.
The future, probably one of the more depressing things for me to think about solely because so far, I have no plans other than to just survive and go where I feel I’m needed. I don’t think I’ll get very far, which is the part that induces stress and sadness. You think you’ll fail, no matter how hard you’re working. But, if there’s one thing I’ve learned in all my years of my mind setting me up to think of myself as a failure, it’s that I shouldn’t care. And to an extent, I don’t.
Relationships, who doesn’t think about these at some point? And I’m not just talking about y’know, boyfriend/girlfriend, wife/husband, paying customer/gimp stuff. I mean ALL relationships. You and everyone else you ‘hang out’ with on perhaps a daily basis. Some people have A LOT of ‘friends’. I don’t. I don’t want many, and I sure as hell don’t need many to get through the day. I think in all I have, two best friends/sisters (not blood related) that I feel I can tell pretty much anything to. Somewhere between five and ten people (those I call my ‘friends’) that I’ll talk to just to get rid of my unimportant time. But with all relationships comes some sort of paranoia. “They haven’t talked/texted me today, are they mad at me? Crap, what’d I do?!” “Well if I do one thing they don’t approve of, they won’t be my friend anymore…” Stop! Brain, just stop right. F***king. There. I am me. If they don’t approve, or for some reason just walk out of your life forever, you’ll be okay. And always will be. Hopefully, I dunno really.
I don’t know if others think about it as much as I do, but I think about music a lot. Perhaps even unhealthily so. Music is, for me, one of those things I need just to get through the day. It is my oxygen, water, sleep, food, whatever the hell you wanna call it. It can control my emotions. It is my relaxer. It is, in some ways, my way of ‘getting high’. Which in turn is good, cause I know I probably won’t just go kill someone for no real reason. But only if I have music.
Am I going to work out today? That’s a stupid question, of course I’m going to. It feels good and keeps me from becoming obese. Not that there’s anything wrong with obesity… I just don’t roll like that for myself.
When is the next time I’ll get to go to sleep? Not only do I think about this when I’m alone, I think about this about… 30 times a day. Being asleep means I don’t have to deal with life at the moment, which is f***ing splendiferous if you ask me. Oh what? You say I’m just running away from my problems by sleeping? Hell yea I am! And I don’t care!
I’m hungry.
Sex, drugs, and rock n’ roll! Being the hormonal teenager I am, this should be quite obvious. But then again, I’ll be thinking about such things for the rest of my life. Just like all the rest of you out there. Don’t you dare deny it. I don’t care how innocent you think you are, don’t lie to yourself.
Did I make the most of my day? No. And the answer will always be no. Because I am lazy. And as I take much enjoyment in saying, I corner-a** my way through life. I am an underachiever. Unless it involves something I’m really into. But even then I’m still lazy about it.
I wanna go somewhere. But will I? NO! Again, it’s because I’m lazy. And if it’s over 80 degrees outside with the sun piercing me through my clothes, there’s no way in hell you’re getting me out of the air conditioning. Well there are some ways… But you get my point. Maybe.
I’m a bad person. And I don’t mean bad as in I go out and kill, rape, pillage, etc. I mean that whole “I hate myself” thing. I wanna runaway, and never say goodbye (Ha! Linkin Park reference). I’ve done some things in my life that I wish I hadn’t, and some things I wish I had. Who the f*** hasn’t?! But unfortunately it’s too late to take most things back and change the past. So accept it. It’ll haunt your mind for the rest of your damned life. But just accept it and move on. Make it better. You’re wiser and stronger now, you’ve overcome the past. Make the most of today. Go walk out to the park miles away in the middle of the night and light yourself up. Or not. Again, I don’t care. IT’S MY LIFE, I’LL DO WHAT I WANT! Bye.