OK so Thanksgiving will be here FRIDAY and SATURDAY. no one is coming thursday that i know of since no one has messaged me otherwise. so yeah. could use the extra day anyway i guess. So yeah Open invite. if you see this you are invited. blah blah blah.

WHO is coming to Thanksgiving. if you are reading this you are invited. I repeat. IF YOU ARE READING THIS YOU ARE INVITED FOR TURKEY AND SUCH. so yeah a little bit of a head count and when you may be arriving would be epic. thursday or friday or saturday?

THANKSGIVING BITCHES!

yeah there has been no ceiling collapse this year so i should be able to pull it off! thats right. come fill your gaping mouth holes with food

as usual it should start the day off and go through the weekend so hide from black friday and the Consumer Zombie Apocalypse here.

Currently i am planning on having
TURKEYS! (hopefully bacon mummified if i can ever get back to rogers to buy the good stuff. which ironically is also the cheapest stuff)
Baked Porn
STUFFING
Mashed Taters
butter fried corn
possible candied yams
some pies
whatever is not fast enough to escape me

So yeah my whores! who be coming.

OK then...... so that was fun

i have been having this continuing dream fro 4 days now. even if i close my eyes for a little while it continues. It has been evolving and leading to something and led to it's conclusion today while i slept (cause i have been sleeping a LOT for the last four days) it started out with me as a seven year old vampire that was turning 77 and was getting an internet ordered adult guy for a present. through the dreams he was like my teddy bear. a teddy bear that was also a sippy drink cup. somehow he was taken from me and i had to preform all these odd tasks to try to get him back. slowly i stopped being a 7 year old vampire and became an even fatter parody of myself. More adventures with the same people and new ones in more horrible places and more and more embarassing situations. finally i got to this point that i had to defeat various things ending up being sentient cakes with swords and i had to fight down to the last white cake. When i finally got to the last white cake no one would tell me what to do with it til the last moments of the dream. It was a white cake made of cement and frosting and yellow cake with a elbow from a downspout in the center. i was supposed to fit it over a 200 foot tall flagpole and get it to reach the ground. At this point i was fucking determined to do this shit. as i was able to take some control of the dream and cut the pole into a standing piece with a small enough diameter to thread the cake on i was told if i was able to do this then i could have the great reward of dying.

then it got real. there were shadowy things talking to me about it. the inner ganesha had kicked in which would not let me quit but i also did not want to die. then i realized something that in reality i keep deep to myself. I kinda do want to die. and i admitted it out loud in the dream in frustration. All the pain would be gone. all the problems would be gone. all the bad would be gone all my failure would be gone. and for a second i wanted nothing ever as much as i wanted to slam dunk that cake on that sliver of pole so i could die.

but then i felt it in my real body. my heart started beating out of time. some of the voices started egging me on. and a quiet but very loud voice simply stated that did i really want to leave Dave with my mess and to have to deal with all that and after everything would i just leave Aku like that. if i had screamed as loud as i did in the dream i would have broken windows down the block. i tried to jump up anyway only to be hit by some invisible barrier. not because i wanted to die anymore but because i was this fucking close to finally finishing all the things that i had been doing to this point. i was just one tiny move away from finishing all the tasks. My inner Ganesha was furious that i was not done yet. the way should have been clear. finally i hit the ground and tore the damn thing in pieces and tossed them everywhere. in reality my heart stopped being a dick. i felt myself come very very close to completely awake as i breathed in deeply not realizing i had stopped breathing for however long in reality.

now i am awake with fleeting images of this dream in my head. i am pretty sure that was the end of it. IT is cold as fuck outside. it is late. but i need to be near people right now. so i think i am going to go to burger king or something even though it may be raining snowing or what have you and the cold will break me. I just need to be around people right now to know i am alive and working.

well i am somewhat remotely recovered from the WPAFW. slept for 15 hours woke up for a little while and did nothing cause i still hurt so fucking much it was stupid and then went back to sleep and woke up at 2 am to eat and am about to go back to bed after a movie and a short walk trying to stretch my legs since they were cramping.

hoping all the stuff i am missing in the in the piles of stuff at Dobie's. noticed just a few minutes ago that all my new grey art bag is missing. this would be epically bad.

I won a bunch of transformers and some transformer comics. Now i have targets for my bb gun. this makes my day.

Also Kelix Malachite Won the dragon kite i wanted so damn bad and then gave it to me! SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE so fucking happy about that. i cannot wait to get the energy to hang that bitch up. there are a few good places down here to do so. it will be so awesome cause the ceiling in my room needs art. Especially things like that.

Went to the museum for our out on the town cause there was NO DAMN WAY my legs were going to do the hills at the zoo. which is sad cause i love the fish there. But hey the Museum also has a thing where with my food stamp card it cost less to get four of us in than it did for parking which was 5 bucks. and Ember Fox got me an african mask to do art for them. SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE it is an awesome mask and finally one that Roxanne does not think is the most horrific thing in the world!

all in all the WPAFW was great this year even if i feel like i need a week of being in Physical Therapy with borg implants. and as much as i was on the edge of wanting to utterly quit everything after the month leading up to this i am now excited to get started on next year. i just hope i can get a winter free of new drama and disasters so i can work on stuff for Pennsic and WPAFW and maybe even doing the farmers market. i think i may have learned a few things this year in pain that i may be able to get more done with less pain. though i am going to be killing myself hard for the next few weeks since there is a lot to move and do in the yard and garage and house before both Samhain ritual and well just cold weather coming in and beating my plants to death. I just want to be able to plant next year and not have to spend a month of sundays trying to get things done

I WANT YOU INSIDE ME!

this being my fucking journal i can write what the fuck i want.

here enjoy my now banned ad

HOLY FUCKSHIT! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS SHIT!
http://www.wpafw.org/
IT IS THE WPAFW BITCHES! ONLY THE BEST FUCKING THING EVER.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU WAITING FOR. WHY HAVE YOU NOT SIGNED UP. PREREG MOTHERFUCKERS.

I MEAN ODIN'S TITS MAN! THERE IS A HUGE FUCKING RAFFLE HOSTED BY A HUGE MOTHERFUCKER DRESSED IN ORANGE RAISING MONEY FOR AWESOME LAND SHARKS! SOME MAY HAVE LASERS ON THEIR FUCKING HEADS.

WE HAVE ACTIVITIES TOO. NOT LIKE THOSE PUSSY ASS ACTIVITIES EVERYONE ELSE DOES LIKE DWARF TOSSING AND PROJECTILE SWEATING ON PUPPIES! WE HAVE A DRUM CIRCLE! THATS RIGHT YOU CAN BEAT OUT YOUR FRUSTTRATIONS AT YOUR MEANINGLESS LIFE ON DRUMS MADE FROM FLESH! * **

CHARITY POKER! YUP YOU YEASTY COD PIECES! GAMBLE ON THE INNOCENT LIVES OF LANDSHARKS! I MEAN FOR THE LIVES OF INNOCENT LAND SHARKS.... I MEAN TO RAISE MONEY FOR THE LAND SHARKS WHO MAY NOT BE SO INNOCENT. OF BEING FUCKING ADORABLE!

AND FOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDD SHOVE YOUR FUCKING PIEHOLE WITH PIE. SO MUCH PIE AND FOOD YOU WILL EAT TIL YOU EXPLODE. AND FUCK IT IS NOT THE RAMEN AND SHOE BROTH SO MANY OF YOU LIVE ON ALREADY.

NOT GET YOUR NOTACON ON BITCHES!



* cruelty free skins. at least the skins are free from being treated cruelly. you know until you start beating out your heathen mating calls on them

** Also our drums are guaranteed to be not made from puppies and kittens. not guaranteed to be from the skins of sweat shop worker children.

also appologies for bad spelling and shit i cannot see well at all right now. everything is foggy. but i am going to try anyway

saturday before labor day i woek up with the twinge of iritis (Honestly look it up. i am guessing you have all graduated past the second grade and have more that two functioning brain cells and can maybe possibly even copy paste a damn word into google.) So i went to find my eye drops for it. They were gone. I got pissed. i ended up dumping shit out of bags and all manner of thing. No Fucking Eye Drops to be had

So i figured i knew what they were. and while my doctor was not open that day the ER was. Yes i know ERT BAD ER BAD. well fuck off since i have nothing else and no way around to alot of things so it is what the fuck i had.

so after the farmers market picking up produce to start prepping for stuff i went there. after an hour i was seen. I was tol di did not have my old friend Iritis and that it was a corneal scrathc and they gave me eyedrops that ended up making it all worse.
well fuck.

so monday i come back telling them that the drops are made of pure hate and are making everything worse and that if they just gave me the fucking eye drops i had asked for then i coul dbe good and on my fucking way. NOPE!!!!! you have uveitis! Level Up. and even though the fuckiung care sheet says to give you the drops you asked for here have some fucking antibacterial drops for an autoimmune infection that is not caused by a outside vector.

the new drops were much like the googgles of Mega man fame. they did nothing.

tuesday morning i go to my eye doctor. Get told they cannot give me an appoint ment til like monday. Fine make one for me. Stupid looks. eventually i just fucking leave.

back to the ER trip three. Ask if there are any other doctors of the eye type in town. after all all i have is a mobility scooter for ALL my transport needs. Nope they do not think they do. but tell me to go look it up as they ALREADY KNOW i cannot see shit and definitely cannot fucking read at all with my eyes being whores.

Call the eye doctor again on thrusday since the ER called them and they tried to blow up my fucking phone in the ER calling me even though all cell phone signals are mostly blocked in the fucking ER. Anyway i get told that not only could i not get a quick eye appo8intment despite the pain and bullshit but that indeed they would not have a fucking doctor til october

friday go back to ER since now pain is everywhere in my upper face. This shit has been so god damned bad i have been unable to read anything. light was beyond horific. i have been driving around town endlessly looking for help with only one working eye and no depth perception. Hell i had to keep buying pre made food for the entire fucking time since i nearly cut my own finger off trying to cut a fucking cucumber. and when Dave asked me to cook some salmon i almost tossed it into the trash trying to flip the fucking thing. I have been a danger to myself all the time. Could barely eat unless i had my eyes closed since focusing on anything was like haveing a steak knife through the eye (they work as a team) and not being able to sleep for more that two hours at a time because if i slept on my one side it would hurt the eye. if i flipped to the other side it hurt my nigh useless fucking arm. and well sleeping on my fucking back is NO since my fat makes it hard to breath like that.

so yeah already not happy.

so i go to the ER on friday cause the pain has spread. I am trying to go with their fucking diagnosis and think maybe the "infectoin" has spread. So my ONLY thought was maybe they can give me something for that so i can sleep at least. THAT IS THE ONLY THING that was in my head

Cue Dr Fuckface McHamfist. Starts the session with me by tell8ing me EVRYTHING is my fault. and that i cannot sue them. Had no thought of that til then. Argues with me that i cannot have been told what i was told. dismisses me trying to say anything really tells me i have Iritis Which i knew a fucking week ago Yells at me about how importan my fucking eye is at which point i have had it and scream back that i am a fucking artist and i know how fucing iomportant my eye is and that is it not my fault that i am fucking poor and do not have ways to make it to pittsburgh or where the fuck ever he thinks i should go. He decides to give me an eye exam. with h9is bare hands. and the brightest lights this side of a galatci collision. he just grabs my fucking eye lid and turns it inside out to keep my eye open. just hamfists my fucking eye. and then as the last fucking thing puts his fucking thumb on it and PRESSES in and says non chanlantly the pressure is fine. they he calls my eye doctor and i can hear that he is supposed to be on call that night but does not have him come in. comes in and tells me again that i am lair about what i was told trying to get an appointment and that to call them saturday morning and that i would get hold of the doctor himself,. hands me the paper on iritis which HAS THE EXACT RECOMMENDATION OF THE MEDICINE I HAVE BEEN ASKING FOR RIGHT ON THE FUCKING THING! but does not give me the medicine. By the point my eye hurts so fucking bad all i can do is openly cry like a baby in a chipper shredder. and do so for like a fucking hour before i can move. I gimp my way home on the scooter without being able to see. i have no idea how i gto home really.

called saturday morning. get told they are not open and cannot give me a fucking appointment and to call back monday morning. My eye hurt worse than anything i have felt in a long time. right up there with the spinal injury. i was useless and could barely see a thing. Also at this point i had no balance left. gimp around saturday.

gimp around sunday

Monday call and MIRACLE get an appointment for around 1:30 pm. Lay back down til then. wake up and have no balance and fall unto the pile of stuff at my "art desk" (which i about give up on ever having) hurt myself. get on scooter. No depth precerption. cannot wear sun glasses and patch at same time. sun comes out hard. vision is gone. go over curb and flip the fucking scooter. call them while righting myself and tel them i am going to be late. thankfully they are ok with that. hu7rt my right arm which has been nigh useless most of the year from injuring it back in Febuary still hurts so fucking bad i can barely sleep right now. and typing one handed with shitty eyes is so much fun let me tell you. ANyway get there. 2 plus hours of eye stuff. get the meds i need. eye feels almost instantly better. but because of this week and some days of stupidity i have eye damage. i am currelty having to take my one eye drop 2 drops every hour. (normally 1 drop eveery 4 hours) and the other drop is that eye dilator because my iris is frozen in place. this is to hopefully loosen it up. he got it to barely move in the time i was there and did those drops three times while i was there.

my blood sugar dropped like Paula Deans approval rating while at the eye doctors. when i finally got to eat it made me so very ill.

but i have my meds and hopefully by thursday i will be able to see properly again and the damamge can be mostly fixed.. Also i am seriously considering filing a lawsuit against people for this shit. namely McHamfist.



UPDATE i have been on the drops for a while now and will be for a bit more but i can finally read again but only for a little while. Also i am so far behind in all i need to do it is not even funny. cold weather is coming and much yard and garage shit needs done as well as much left to get done for the WPAFW

yeah that was two fucking weeks plus i really could not have afforded to lose...

and let me tell you doing detail work on wedding stuff was hell but it did turn out nice.

i found out that the muscle rub from dollar tree works on my arm. as i found my old tube of it recently. but there are pros and cons

Pros
it works for a while and wears off slow
It smells MINTY
at least my arm feels like it is being air conditioned

Cons
takes an HOUR to kick in.
pork grease absorbs in better
even when it does absorb in it can still make my eyes scream after 15 hand washings
even a thick blanket will not drive off the chill from it when i try to sleep
i had less than half a tube when i found it
it takes a LOT to do anything. I mean a lot. i looked like a whale came on my arm for a while.

Also possibly related there is a strange black spot floating in my room. it is round and very very black and hot but not. it feels cold near it too. I thought it was a thing in my eye cause the flashlight did not illuminate it but seemed to go right through it. though the beam of light was a bit off from normal from where it hit on the wall. it is tiny about the size of a bead. it hurts to look at directly.

Whats hilarious about this is how many fuckers keep saying to me still that this will never happen. Well it is going on RIGHT NOW.
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2013/.....Over-By-Miltia

"...Pennsylvania police chief Mark Kessler is the head of a political organization which refers to itself as “The Constitution Security Force.“ Kessler was recently given a thirty day suspension, for using police property as props in a video where he threatens and insults “libtards,” otherwise known as people who hold political views which differ from his own."

perhaps you remember this fucker. There were petitions signed to fire him for being a dickwad. see the power of petitions. See how far the Tea Party has gone over the edge. and you all think this is not going to go down badly if they lose again. They are desperate and a victim of their own fear and propaganda. they believe their own lies. they fear everything different than their own delusions.

SO the other day I had the thought about My Little Sea Slug. I mean real sea slugs are already more colourful than a herd of My Little Ponies. so would their Pony analogs be in beige and clay and taupe?

My Little Sea Slug
My Little Sea Slug
They come in Taupe, Cream, and Beige
My Little Sea Slug
My Little Sea Slug
Shades of brown are all the rage

So when i showered today i mixed some of this bodywash/shampoo for MEN with some AXE that was left in there. I am now so manly that prolonged exposure to me will give chest hair to women and make kittens develop huge biceps. I am pretty sure if i poured a beer in a glass not only would it get a full foam head but the glass would grow a beard. As it is i was cutting up some lettuce for a salad and it became a steak...

So i hid for the heat wave. which killed most of the plants i planted on purpose. well at least did grievous bodily harm to them and only murdered a few. However the weeds (i define weeds as quick growing non edible non medicinal plants that strangle out other plants or overgrow them so quickly as to smother others.) grew like bamboo. In fact one of them i just tore out and now have to rest from doing was so huge i thought it was a Million weeds that took over my area that i have for wildflowers. the main stem was two inches thick. it laid across the ground and sent up branches that looked like full grown weeds. it was 8 feet from root to where it bent up at the last part. the parts standing were three to four feet tall. if it had been standing it would have been taller than my apple tree. may have been wider too. The kicker is i weeded right before the heat wave knowing they would go crazy. so this was a little over a week that it was growing.

and that is just ONE of the weeds i just ripped out. I have almost filled my Compost heap to the brim with them and am only 1/4 done so far.

I am so buying borax and some other things come the first. the time for murder has come.

AC is going to be a HOOT if i keep having the sleep issues i am having right now... it is almost 5 am and i am only barely tired and i woke up Monday in the early afternoon. thats a while to be awake. at least for me anymore. Yeah i remember being young and staying awake for Weeks and hallucinating while trying to graduate from AIP but that was then and i am not that healthy anymore. Probably from doing that shit.

i will have stuff in the AC art show but nothing new since i seem to have ripped something in my shoulder back in Feb and it still is so damn painful that doing much of anything is nothing but horror and madness anymore.

I think i got this damn USB trouble fixed now. it comes and goes. but i have some art done and some photos that need posted and such so hopefully people will like what i have done of late.

So it got COLD here and then someone turned on the BLAST FURNACE! this made me sick as fuck as well as killed nearly everything i planted. seedlings were all like OH NO WAY!

even with the AC on i was sick as hell. so it finally cooled down a bit today and of course my body is all like FUCK YOU I WILL DO NOTHING FOR YOUR PLEASURE WHORE! so i spent most of the day in bed and then a few hours out running errands. when i got back i was finally able to do something in the yard

well i got in two hours of work in the yard before the darkness came. filled a bunch of pots and pulled a BILLION weeds though it does not look like i have. Honestly though Three days of insane baking temps and the yard looks like an image of what the world will look like fifty years after humanity dies!

On the good side one of my grape vines i planted years ago and died is now back. much like the trilliums... i guess someone cast resurrect on my yard after seeing it looking like a blasted heath after winter.

Also across the road there are Wild Dog roses Blooming! the petals do not have much scent but a LOT of flavour. i hope they do not do anything stupid to them. going to try to root a few cuttings as it is and if they survive the season i will gather the fuck out of those rose hips. cause damn even the little white parts on the petals had NO bitter to them. just deliciousness. should get some to dry too. that makes three things across the road i have to try to get to grow here. Wild Black Raspberries. Real blackberries. and now the wild rose. which is a different species than the one i will soon be planting from seeds. they are Almost done cold stratifying now.

Also mystery Gourd/pumpkin/squash appeared in my planting beds. it was super effective!

Also Also Karl Minehart gave me a Banana Tree which is doing great. I need to go up and water everyone in a few minutes as it is.

and my challenge this year is to try to build a Sun Shade Gazebo type thing from trash this year. I seem to have a LOT of odds and ends, Here is hoping it works for a few years if i get it to stand and not look like some redneck there i fixed it type picture. we will see which is more powerful. My gay or the power of redneck engineering. I am hoping for gay. Also another night impossible but i am stupidly going to try and probably injure myself in the process of is that i have the body of a yurt. I will never get to make a real yurt out of it. I just need to accept things. SO i am going to back my raised beds and my compost heap with it to grow beans and pumpkins and such on. the problem will be it is HUGE and i am weak and the compost heap and raised beds are against the fence and i want it between such things so as to have a LOT of stability.

unfortunately i have not gotten much art done from being ill as fuck. Also the internet or just my fucking computer take your pic is being worthless. everything is taking literally up to five minutes to load on some pages. Huffpost will not finish loading cause it is such an image gif filled whore. Buzzfeed crashes the damn thing. You tube is Yousless. cannot watch a damn thing and do not get me started on the fun of an image search. i am guessing either something is on here eating my memory or my old franken comp is just well old as fuck and needs new parts. but i am not exactly the computer genius.

I gots new ferrets. Someone was Moving and could not take their ferrets and we got them. Ricky and Lucy. Still young and smallish. Lucy is a little bit of a wild girl and only bites if you rile her up big time. and Ricky is so laid back he makes Aku look hyper. pictures will come soon. for only the second time in my life i have had a ferret fall asleep on me after they got tuckered out. made me sad when i finally had to get up before my bladder detonated on the couch. They are so damn adorable! I got them thanks to my Friend Heather. it was someone at her workplace that was getting rid of them and want to make sure they got a good home. we turned one of their old cages into a ball pit. going to trick it out a bit more as a little play room. They are all in a ferret pile in the big cage right now! SO CUTE!

Again body thank you. the temps are cool. the clouds are everywhere for the most part. it is a perfect day to plant seeds anew and try again and weed things and play with soil and all that. A wonderful day indeed for YOU TO BLAST FROTHY ANAL MOCHA FROM MY ZESTY CHOCOLATE ROSEBUD! have i mentioned that some days i really hate you.

I am very sorry i have not been updating any at all for a while now. the bad part is while i have done very little i have still done some stuff. stuff i should post. but then i get depressed about a lot of things and then get busy and never do.

An Icelandic saga tells of a Viking who had unusual, menacing
features, including a skull that could resist blows from an ax.
He probably suffered from an ailment called Paget's disease

by Jesse L. Byock

http://www.viking.ucla.edu/Scientif.....gils_Bones.htm

My idea for the tomato cages worked. it turns out that the Hanging Basket Planters from Dollar Tree fit PERFECTLY into the tomato Cages from Family Dollar. I state the stores because as i have seen ever different places get stuff from different manufacturers and therefore it is usually different sizes so say one hanging basket for this place would not fit perfect or even be made the same way as the ones i used. the ones i used have little clips for holding the chains to dangle from. take the chains off but not the clips. the clips are exactly the right length to clip directly to the top circle of the Tomato cages thereby putting them in perfectly to have extra room to grow things on the top (for me it will be herbs like basil and such) i will take pics in a bit. Also the whole damn set up is four bucks per. Two for the tomato cage. one for the metal basket and one for the coconut fiber liners, so now i have twice the growing space in the same five gallon bucket footprint! i think i may have to make more of these and put them in some of my other bigger pots. I could grow smaller wildflowers and other pollinator attractors in the baskets above other veggies and herbs

yeah today is sucking all the suck took a nap to get past some serious leg pain and woke up completely in pain. everything fucking hurts so damn bad. not even my tramadol is doing shit. or maybe it is and i am not knowing how bad i really hurt. also i hooked up this card reader so i can FINALLY after a year get some damn photos off my camera. it started going crazy on the computer telling me it detected every single thing literally up to 5 times and was detecting all manner of shit. Volume found. New Volume found. BLAH BLAH BLAH and all the while it kept making horrid noises at me saying nothing was compatible and asking if i wanted to continue to install. it did that about 40 times. for every single new thing found i guess. i got so angry i screamed at the computer and then nearly fainted. just like that. i felt insanely dizzy and like i was going to vomit up my feet and then i felt weak and could barely lift a finger. that was like 15 minutes ago and i am still shaking like a leaf and hurting even more. WTF.

http://tunein.com/radio/Boston-Poli.....anner-s146109/

you can hear what is going on as it happens