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How do you measure a snake?
Posted 5 years agoWhy, in inches of course, 'cuz they don't have feet!
Just needed to push the last journal off my main page
Stay beautiful, everyone~
Just needed to push the last journal off my main page
Stay beautiful, everyone~
Very Important Cat Missions
Posted 5 years agoI know it's been a good long while since I've been active here, besides the few pictures I've posted recently
Nevertheless, here's a quick brief of what's been going on!
In light of the global pandemic and the stresses that came with it, I've been experiencing a great deal of changes in my life
For one thing, I went back to school in the fall of last year, and even now it's still taking up a considerable amount of my time
That's not at all a bad thing though, if nothing else I'm happy to be busy especially as I continue working towards my degree!
I had the resolve to leave a toxic relationship in order to better focus on myself and figure out what it is I really want in life
For years I lived in the shadow of what I believed the world wanted me to be, and it's only now that I feel like I'm becoming the real me
For the first time ever I'm making connections within the local furry scene, and the friends I've made since then have become very dear to me
Just less than two weeks ago I moved away from living with my ex and into a new place! In spite of the quarantine I couldn't be happier
I've begun a whole new chapter in my life, here in my own space, and rediscovering myself again
I know for some time I've been murmuring about a big project in the works, and I assure you I haven't lost sight of it!
To tell you all the truth I've been lacking the motivation to sit down and work on any concept sketches or practice in Blender
Sometimes I get a little down on myself for being lazy but all things considered I've had far more pressing matters to attend to lately
That being said I'm finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and as the dust settles I'll challenge myself to become more dedicated to my art
Thank you so much to everyone who has supported me throughout the last 7 months, I wouldn't be here today without you!
Nevertheless, here's a quick brief of what's been going on!
In light of the global pandemic and the stresses that came with it, I've been experiencing a great deal of changes in my life
For one thing, I went back to school in the fall of last year, and even now it's still taking up a considerable amount of my time
That's not at all a bad thing though, if nothing else I'm happy to be busy especially as I continue working towards my degree!
I had the resolve to leave a toxic relationship in order to better focus on myself and figure out what it is I really want in life
For years I lived in the shadow of what I believed the world wanted me to be, and it's only now that I feel like I'm becoming the real me
For the first time ever I'm making connections within the local furry scene, and the friends I've made since then have become very dear to me
Just less than two weeks ago I moved away from living with my ex and into a new place! In spite of the quarantine I couldn't be happier
I've begun a whole new chapter in my life, here in my own space, and rediscovering myself again
I know for some time I've been murmuring about a big project in the works, and I assure you I haven't lost sight of it!
To tell you all the truth I've been lacking the motivation to sit down and work on any concept sketches or practice in Blender
Sometimes I get a little down on myself for being lazy but all things considered I've had far more pressing matters to attend to lately
That being said I'm finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and as the dust settles I'll challenge myself to become more dedicated to my art
Thank you so much to everyone who has supported me throughout the last 7 months, I wouldn't be here today without you!
Thank You
Posted 6 years agoI recently posted a journal here talking about my depression
It was a hard step to take, but it's becoming easier
I was even able to see my doctor yesterday!
I just want to say thank you to everyone who has supported me through this
I'm very thankful to have you all to turn to when I need :3
Thanks again for taking the time to read <3
It was a hard step to take, but it's becoming easier
I was even able to see my doctor yesterday!
I just want to say thank you to everyone who has supported me through this
I'm very thankful to have you all to turn to when I need :3
Thanks again for taking the time to read <3
Reaching Out for Help [Depression]
Posted 6 years agoI know I'm not very active here if at all, and I don't really talk much, so I don't know how many people will see this
Some of you may know that for many years - really for as long as I can remember - I've been battling with depression and anxiety
If I'm being honest I don't know what to say, I've never really opened up about my depression to anyone; this is the first time in my life that I'm actually reaching out for help
It's always been hard for me to express how I truly feel, I've always told myself that it's not worth saying anything if nothing can really be done about it, or simply that no one would care, or if nothing else just to avoid any confrontation
Even now as I'm writing this journal, I'm having doubts on whether I should even bother posting it
"Would anyone read this? Even if anyone did, would they care? And even if they cared, would it make any difference?"
Most of my feelings and insecurities are things that I've just never resolved because of doubts like this, and it all gets pushed aside so I can pretend it doesn't exist
And I mean don't get me wrong, none of this is because of events in my life now [honestly I've dealt with this for so many years I don't know if there even is a root cause]
I'm a happy guy living a happy life, but I think sometimes - or maybe a lot of the time - I only say that I'm fine because I don't want anyone to ask what's wrong
I don't like taking about my problems because I'm scared of dealing with my own emotions, so instead I'd rather put it all in a box and stick it on a shelf so I can carry on with my day
Even if I'm not consciously thinking about it, my depression will still find ways to bubble to the surface in my everyday life
This most often comes in the form of obsessing over being perfect in everything that I do, and to such an unhealthy degree that I will tear myself apart if I make even the littlest mistake
I understand that bottling up my emotions has never been healthy for me, but it's a habit I've never been able to break
My head gets so clouded with doubts and questions that it's difficult for me to even make sense of it all, let alone try to talk about it or work through it
Even with all this being said though, the thing eating at me the most is the fact that I don't know how to deal with any of this, especially now after it's built up after years and years of just letting myself suffer in silence
I'm at a point now where I'm done allowing my fear to hold me back from reaching out, even if I don't know exactly what steps to take
All I know is the longer I let myself stay quiet about this, the worse it's going to get
And so instead of admitting defeat and continuing to let my depression control me, I'm here asking for help
What would you suggest I do?
Thank you for taking the time to read
Some of you may know that for many years - really for as long as I can remember - I've been battling with depression and anxiety
If I'm being honest I don't know what to say, I've never really opened up about my depression to anyone; this is the first time in my life that I'm actually reaching out for help
It's always been hard for me to express how I truly feel, I've always told myself that it's not worth saying anything if nothing can really be done about it, or simply that no one would care, or if nothing else just to avoid any confrontation
Even now as I'm writing this journal, I'm having doubts on whether I should even bother posting it
"Would anyone read this? Even if anyone did, would they care? And even if they cared, would it make any difference?"
Most of my feelings and insecurities are things that I've just never resolved because of doubts like this, and it all gets pushed aside so I can pretend it doesn't exist
And I mean don't get me wrong, none of this is because of events in my life now [honestly I've dealt with this for so many years I don't know if there even is a root cause]
I'm a happy guy living a happy life, but I think sometimes - or maybe a lot of the time - I only say that I'm fine because I don't want anyone to ask what's wrong
I don't like taking about my problems because I'm scared of dealing with my own emotions, so instead I'd rather put it all in a box and stick it on a shelf so I can carry on with my day
Even if I'm not consciously thinking about it, my depression will still find ways to bubble to the surface in my everyday life
This most often comes in the form of obsessing over being perfect in everything that I do, and to such an unhealthy degree that I will tear myself apart if I make even the littlest mistake
I understand that bottling up my emotions has never been healthy for me, but it's a habit I've never been able to break
My head gets so clouded with doubts and questions that it's difficult for me to even make sense of it all, let alone try to talk about it or work through it
Even with all this being said though, the thing eating at me the most is the fact that I don't know how to deal with any of this, especially now after it's built up after years and years of just letting myself suffer in silence
I'm at a point now where I'm done allowing my fear to hold me back from reaching out, even if I don't know exactly what steps to take
All I know is the longer I let myself stay quiet about this, the worse it's going to get
And so instead of admitting defeat and continuing to let my depression control me, I'm here asking for help
What would you suggest I do?
Thank you for taking the time to read
Why do vampires chew gum?
Posted 6 years agoLiterally just wanted to push the last journal off my front page
I would have just deleted it but I didn't want the one before that up either
I have a lot of weird idiosyncrasies :0
I would have just deleted it but I didn't want the one before that up either
I have a lot of weird idiosyncrasies :0
Just need to vent
Posted 6 years agoSo, I ran into a particular someone today, someone I haven't seen in several years
Things didn't exactly end well between us, and I felt responsible for most of what happened
If I'm being honest with myself I had felt like it was time for some closure for a long while now, but I was so scared about how he would respond
I finally worked up the courage and was able to apologize and express my feelings, and I can't help but feel like it was kind of pointless...
He at least let me speak, but he didn't really say anything back, I got this impression of "okay now fuck off"
I keep telling myself things like at least I made my peace, if he really wanted to say something he would have, or well he had his chance and didn't take it
I dunno really, I guess a part of me wished we could move on, but such is life, can't always get what you wish for
All in all I'm fine, but this whole experience still kinda fucked with me emotionally
If anybody has any encouraging words, god I could really use them now
Thanks for reading
Things didn't exactly end well between us, and I felt responsible for most of what happened
If I'm being honest with myself I had felt like it was time for some closure for a long while now, but I was so scared about how he would respond
I finally worked up the courage and was able to apologize and express my feelings, and I can't help but feel like it was kind of pointless...
He at least let me speak, but he didn't really say anything back, I got this impression of "okay now fuck off"
I keep telling myself things like at least I made my peace, if he really wanted to say something he would have, or well he had his chance and didn't take it
I dunno really, I guess a part of me wished we could move on, but such is life, can't always get what you wish for
All in all I'm fine, but this whole experience still kinda fucked with me emotionally
If anybody has any encouraging words, god I could really use them now
Thanks for reading
Considering expanding my horizons
Posted 7 years agoHey all
This is something I started thinking about a few days ago, as far as expanding to other art sites for exposure
I've used Deviantart, Sofurry, and even Weasyl in the past, so it wouldn't be hard to pick one or more of those back up
This isn't to day that I'll be here any less [like I'm here that much to begin with], just kinda putting the thought out there
Not to mention just how quiet it seems to be on FA nowadays >w>
Maybe there's some secret chat room I don't know about where everyone is lurking
This is something I started thinking about a few days ago, as far as expanding to other art sites for exposure
I've used Deviantart, Sofurry, and even Weasyl in the past, so it wouldn't be hard to pick one or more of those back up
This isn't to day that I'll be here any less [like I'm here that much to begin with], just kinda putting the thought out there
Not to mention just how quiet it seems to be on FA nowadays >w>
Maybe there's some secret chat room I don't know about where everyone is lurking
More stuff coming soon!
Posted 7 years agoSalutations, fuzzbutts
Well I am officially all moved into my new place!
It was a lot of hard work and stress but the deed is done
Which means now I can blow the dust off of my tablet and get to doodling
For the time being I'm just drawing whatever comes to mind, but eventually you all will start seeing some character concepts for an original story I'm working on
That's all for now, sorry for the lack of activity here lately but it will pick up soon :3
Well I am officially all moved into my new place!
It was a lot of hard work and stress but the deed is done
Which means now I can blow the dust off of my tablet and get to doodling
For the time being I'm just drawing whatever comes to mind, but eventually you all will start seeing some character concepts for an original story I'm working on
That's all for now, sorry for the lack of activity here lately but it will pick up soon :3
Reason for my absence
Posted 7 years agoY O
So yeah I thought I'd be a bit more on top of my art but lately things have been a bit hectic
The reason is I'm moving! My boyfriend and I are moving into our first place together and it's the last month to prepare
That combined with the stress at work has really put a damper on my artistic motivation
Additionally, I've closed requests for the time being due to the above reasons
I still have 2 requests on my to-do list, and I do plan on completing them
To the 2 peeps who are waiting, I do apologize
Well that's all the news I got for now
Hope you all are having a great day!
So yeah I thought I'd be a bit more on top of my art but lately things have been a bit hectic
The reason is I'm moving! My boyfriend and I are moving into our first place together and it's the last month to prepare
That combined with the stress at work has really put a damper on my artistic motivation
Additionally, I've closed requests for the time being due to the above reasons
I still have 2 requests on my to-do list, and I do plan on completing them
To the 2 peeps who are waiting, I do apologize
Well that's all the news I got for now
Hope you all are having a great day!
For any who may care to know
Posted 7 years agoOn a whim I decided to recover my password and log back onto this poor desolate profile
I recently became inspired to delve back into the world of art and by extension the furry community
If I start really posting on this site more maybe I'll share the story
Anywho, I'm looking into character design, 3D animation, and possibly even game design if the planets align just right
I already plan on going back to school to study in said fields, and in the meantime I've been practicing my sketchy sketch skills and learning blender
That means if I can muster enough motivation to kick myself into gear I may start becoming more active here again
On that note, I bid you all farewell
P.S. Expect an updated ref for my fursona
I'm no longer going to be a hybrid, though my mild obsession for dragons still remains
I shall be a normal cat but the ref is coming soon
kthx
I recently became inspired to delve back into the world of art and by extension the furry community
If I start really posting on this site more maybe I'll share the story
Anywho, I'm looking into character design, 3D animation, and possibly even game design if the planets align just right
I already plan on going back to school to study in said fields, and in the meantime I've been practicing my sketchy sketch skills and learning blender
That means if I can muster enough motivation to kick myself into gear I may start becoming more active here again
On that note, I bid you all farewell
P.S. Expect an updated ref for my fursona
I'm no longer going to be a hybrid, though my mild obsession for dragons still remains
I shall be a normal cat but the ref is coming soon
kthx
Quirky weird thing
Posted 10 years agoI dunno why I suddenly started thinking of this
But like
What do you guys think I look like?
Like my human self 'n stuff
I mean I get people acting all surprised when they find out what I look like
And I always wonder
"Well what did you THINK I looked like?"
So for anyone who hasn't seen mah face,
What do you think I'd look like? :o
Doesn't have to be super specific or anythin
You could like, link me to a photo or something Idon'tevenfuckingknow
~Alest
But like
What do you guys think I look like?
Like my human self 'n stuff
I mean I get people acting all surprised when they find out what I look like
And I always wonder
"Well what did you THINK I looked like?"
So for anyone who hasn't seen mah face,
What do you think I'd look like? :o
Doesn't have to be super specific or anythin
You could like, link me to a photo or something Idon'tevenfuckingknow
~Alest
Aah what the hell, TMI Tuesday? xD
Posted 10 years agoI'm bored with nothing to do
Ask me anything
I DARE YA
~Alest
Ask me anything
I DARE YA
~Alest
Free requests anyone? o3o/
Posted 10 years agoI'm in a drawing mood, and with school getting out in a few days I'm gonna want something to occupy my time
So I'm gonna open up for free requests ^w^
They'll all be traditional, black and white sketches, may ink later if they come out really nice
Unfortunately I don't have a scanner so I'm gonna have to make due with my phone camera :s
But anyway I digress
FREE REQUESTS ARE OPEN <3
~Alest
So I'm gonna open up for free requests ^w^
They'll all be traditional, black and white sketches, may ink later if they come out really nice
Unfortunately I don't have a scanner so I'm gonna have to make due with my phone camera :s
But anyway I digress
FREE REQUESTS ARE OPEN <3
~Alest
Started writing my first story!! <3
Posted 10 years agoSo I'm not sure how many people here remember my ages old project "Inglorious Nirvana"
But I finally started writing the rough draft ^w^
I renamed it to "A Wolf Among Dragons," but it holds the same basic plot and storyline as before
I'm really excited to get this done and put out there for all to see :3
~Alest
But I finally started writing the rough draft ^w^
I renamed it to "A Wolf Among Dragons," but it holds the same basic plot and storyline as before
I'm really excited to get this done and put out there for all to see :3
~Alest
I got the League of the Legends, y'all
Posted 10 years agoYeah yeah, I finally got it
And I LOVE IT
It's just so good
I love the art, the characters
Oh it's just so good
You can add me: Alestreme
I've found I have an undying love for long-range aggro
Oh and also that Jinx is my favorite little psycho <3
~Alest
And I LOVE IT
It's just so good
I love the art, the characters
Oh it's just so good
You can add me: Alestreme
I've found I have an undying love for long-range aggro
Oh and also that Jinx is my favorite little psycho <3
~Alest
Merr Chrsms <3
Posted 10 years agoI knownit's not until tomorrow, but I wanna wish you all a very merry Christmas
(Or whatever holiday you may celebrate xD)
....Well that's about it o3o
kthxbai
~Alest
(Or whatever holiday you may celebrate xD)
....Well that's about it o3o
kthxbai
~Alest
*rapidly expires*
Posted 11 years agoOi, I need to be more active
School has got me run down pretty bad ;~;
Ugh things have just been so crazy lately
I'm just drowning in family drama and inbox notifications
~Alest
School has got me run down pretty bad ;~;
Ugh things have just been so crazy lately
I'm just drowning in family drama and inbox notifications
~Alest
I caved in guys, made a Furgather account +News
Posted 11 years agoYep, yep I did
Still getting used to all the mechanics, dunno how much I like it yet
But hey, this is why we try new things
Here's my profile, for anyone who wants to add me or whatever xD
http://www.furgather.com/Alestreme
Now onto news
MY COMPUTER FUCKING DIED
Like seriously, it just won't start anymore
So now I gotta ship it to Vegas so my dad can rip it apart and clean it up
It'll probably end up being better than it was new
So I'm excited, but I'm still kinda pissed
I need to get some writing done ;A;
~Alest
Still getting used to all the mechanics, dunno how much I like it yet
But hey, this is why we try new things
Here's my profile, for anyone who wants to add me or whatever xD
http://www.furgather.com/Alestreme
Now onto news
MY COMPUTER FUCKING DIED
Like seriously, it just won't start anymore
So now I gotta ship it to Vegas so my dad can rip it apart and clean it up
It'll probably end up being better than it was new
So I'm excited, but I'm still kinda pissed
I need to get some writing done ;A;
~Alest
My not-so-triumphant return
Posted 11 years agoYeeeaaaahhhhh, Weasyl was not very fun for me
So, I'm back here to stay :3
Not much else to say really o3o
Not feeling terribly talkative this morning
So, I'm back here to stay :3
Not much else to say really o3o
Not feeling terribly talkative this morning
Back from my trip!! Photos to come (too lazy)
Posted 11 years agoYes, I made it back home in one piece c:
I had tons of fun in the most expensive place on Earth
No seriously, I knew everything there would be expensive but oh my fucking god
My wallet would cry itself to sleep every night, and the sales tax was just a huge bully D:
But alas, I still had a blast!! As for souvenirs I got myself a really cool Mad Hatter style hat and riddled it with Disney pins (along with my beloved Attack on titan pin because reasons)
Anyway I'll be sure to post some pictures of my adventures within the week
I'd do it now but it's late, and I have some schoolwork to catch up on
Not to mention finals kinda creeped up and scared the shit out of me so ick
Goodnight all, see you lovely furs around <3
~Alest
I had tons of fun in the most expensive place on Earth
No seriously, I knew everything there would be expensive but oh my fucking god
My wallet would cry itself to sleep every night, and the sales tax was just a huge bully D:
But alas, I still had a blast!! As for souvenirs I got myself a really cool Mad Hatter style hat and riddled it with Disney pins (along with my beloved Attack on titan pin because reasons)
Anyway I'll be sure to post some pictures of my adventures within the week
I'd do it now but it's late, and I have some schoolwork to catch up on
Not to mention finals kinda creeped up and scared the shit out of me so ick
Goodnight all, see you lovely furs around <3
~Alest
Gonna be away until next Tuesday
Posted 11 years agoWell I'm taking a leave of absence until next Tuesday
I'm gonna be spending the weekend in the wonderful Disney Land with the rest of my choir class :P
I can't believe I graduate in two weeks like, holy shit
I'm gonna miss these guys so much ;A;
BUT I WANNA GRADUATE SO BAD
HOW DO FEELS EVEN WORK?
*goes off the cry about my conflicted feels*
~Alest
I'm gonna be spending the weekend in the wonderful Disney Land with the rest of my choir class :P
I can't believe I graduate in two weeks like, holy shit
I'm gonna miss these guys so much ;A;
BUT I WANNA GRADUATE SO BAD
HOW DO FEELS EVEN WORK?
*goes off the cry about my conflicted feels*
~Alest
Nevermind, all fixed :3
Posted 11 years agoWell thanks to the effort of one of my close tech-savvy friends, my SAI problem has been fixed <3
Apologies for the hiatus +PT SAI help, can't save my files!!
Posted 11 years agoYeah I decided to make my return to this site
Sorry for leaving on you guys, life was getting kinda hectic
As you know, school and senioritis and such
But soon that will all be over and I'll have more time for all you beautiful furs out there!!
Also, from the title, I NEED HELP
For some odd reason, Paint Tool SAI won't let me save files as PNGs anymore
I can save them as PSD files, but as soon as I try to save/export it as a PNG or JPEG file, it tells me it failed to save
I don't know if this has to do with my computer itself, or if I'm just doing it wrong, but I am in desperate need of help here and it's really frustrating >:T
I hope I can have a great time on this site again, see you all around <3
P.S. Thank you to the 6 people who followed me while I was away!! *blows kisses*
~Alest
Sorry for leaving on you guys, life was getting kinda hectic
As you know, school and senioritis and such
But soon that will all be over and I'll have more time for all you beautiful furs out there!!
Also, from the title, I NEED HELP
For some odd reason, Paint Tool SAI won't let me save files as PNGs anymore
I can save them as PSD files, but as soon as I try to save/export it as a PNG or JPEG file, it tells me it failed to save
I don't know if this has to do with my computer itself, or if I'm just doing it wrong, but I am in desperate need of help here and it's really frustrating >:T
I hope I can have a great time on this site again, see you all around <3
P.S. Thank you to the 6 people who followed me while I was away!! *blows kisses*
~Alest
Last chance to follow me on Weasyl (Leavinggggg :c)
Posted 11 years agoFirst off, here -> https://www.weasyl.com/~alestreme
Second, yes I'm leaving
No it's not because of all the admin drama
It's not because of ANY drama really
I just don't wanna stay here is all
I have my reasons, so meh
Anyway, Weasyl is gonna be my only account, asnd it'll soon become very active
(Once I can get my laptop that is ALASKDJFHDFHSJSFKFGLDKSAJ)
So yep, I'm officially moving, not that there was much to move in the first place xD
So if you're still interested in keeping up with my art, you can follow me on Weasyl
*shrugs*You don't really HAVE to if you don't wanna, just sayin you can
It's been fun <3
~Alest
Second, yes I'm leaving
No it's not because of all the admin drama
It's not because of ANY drama really
I just don't wanna stay here is all
I have my reasons, so meh
Anyway, Weasyl is gonna be my only account, asnd it'll soon become very active
(Once I can get my laptop that is ALASKDJFHDFHSJSFKFGLDKSAJ)
So yep, I'm officially moving, not that there was much to move in the first place xD
So if you're still interested in keeping up with my art, you can follow me on Weasyl
*shrugs*You don't really HAVE to if you don't wanna, just sayin you can
It's been fun <3
~Alest
Made a Weasyl!! (No I'm not Leaving)
Posted 11 years agoI just felt like making myself a Weasyl account because it seems everyone has one xD
Anyway here I am: https://www.weasyl.com/~alestreme
Whether or not I'm leaving FA is at this point undetermined
Translation: If all the artists I watch end up leaving, I will too
Or until I find my own reason to leave, which is unlikely
Point is, I'm NOT leaving, so there :3
Anyway just wanted to put my Weasyl out there
kthxbai
~Alest
Anyway here I am: https://www.weasyl.com/~alestreme
Whether or not I'm leaving FA is at this point undetermined
Translation: If all the artists I watch end up leaving, I will too
Or until I find my own reason to leave, which is unlikely
Point is, I'm NOT leaving, so there :3
Anyway just wanted to put my Weasyl out there
kthxbai
~Alest
