i've seen artists abandon the fandom more than a few times, and i've never understood why. like i get taking a break cuz you aren't making enough money through it, or you're having personal issues, but, why abandon a part of yourself, a part of the art world, that makes you and so many others so happy?
i vaguely remember someone talking about furry porn being distasteful and like you should be ashamed if you spend so much of your time creating it but like... i don't get that at all. i'm sad i can't show some of my best works to my family and acquaintances, but it's not cuz i'm ashamed of making it, it's cuz THEY are prudes. i'm sorry for THEM, that they get so hung up on something being sexual(which is just a part of life btw. if sex wasn't a thing none of us would be here, so why be ashamed of it?), or different, that they can't appreciate it's artistic value.
i've seen plenty of pieces here, and human art elsewhere, that i didn't like the subject of, but could still appreciate because of its quality, its beauty, the amount of effort that went into making it, and just... the fact that someone DID make it. we have the power to transform a blank canvas into a window that shows us a world that only exists within our minds! how fucking rad is that?!?! if it's weird or disturbing, that just makes it all the more fascinating that it can exist! that humans can come up with such outrageous things, that we can be so DIFFERENT from eachother, and even from the world we live in!

...and besides, if you want to make something else, you don't have to STOP making furry art. you can do both! you can do nasty porn on the side and tasteful 'normal' stuff for a main, or the reverse! the beauty of the human is that we are multi-faceted beings.



tldr; i am never going to stop making furry art, or bail on the fandom.

so i've basically been playing animal crossing for the entire past week, no breaks. barely even touched my computer (and therefor the internet, since i have no smartphone) this whole time, cuz i've been playing it on the couch downstairs so my husband can sort of watch. i've been binging it so hard cuz i got it late, and i had time traveled back to launch day and was working my way forward at a break-neck (for animal crossing) pace in order to catch up to real time. i am now caught up! so i will be playing less, and back on my computer more. this also means i'll be drawing again, and i have several pieces in the works!

would you guys be interested in my animal crossing stuff? probably not dumb screenshots, i'll put those on tumblr, maybe twitter. but i have done some 'designs' in-game that are basically pixel art, and i'm rather proud of them.

finally got a swtich(and animal crossing)! just renting my brother's but it'll do for now, till prices go back to normal. send me a note if ya wanna be friends and visit islands! (i have apples and lilies and am looking for roses and cosmos)

I TOLD YOU, I TOLD ALL OF YOU BUT YOU THOUGHT I WAS CRAZY
me telling you; https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9401034/
proof i'm not crazy; https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9458514/

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/35772767/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/35772767/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/35772767/

 AlenkaVoxis is doin' a raffle, check it out!

i cancelled my patreon recently. it wasn't doing well and patreon decided to outlaw some stuff and that pissed me off. plus, i can just do reoccurring bills on paypal, and not have to share as much of the money(if any).

but, i would still like to be able to have patrons who support me, and reward them for that support. i'm just not sure if anyone's interested. i don't have much for it, as i'm terrible at creating content on a schedule, but i have this big list of ideas for personal art, and figured maybe patrons could vote on which one i do next? would anyone be interested in that? i'm thinking just a dollar per month. (but of course if you donated more it would be vastly appreciated)

 renneon is doing a quick, 5-day only raffle! (it's not an april fool's joke, that wouldn't be very nice. gods i hate april fools day) if ya wanna, check it out; https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9452852/

i am now legally required to stay home except for bare necessities. so, just my usual life. and i'm not sure i'll be able to get a switch after all, since they're all being price gouged due to the quarantine... *sigh* first world recluse problems.

i've just finished my queue! i'm a little burned out after doing so many large commissions back to back, but i still feel like doing art (and i'd like to get some cash so maybe i can get the new animal crossing) so i'm thinking that having more artistic freedom and sticking with simple poses might make it feasible for me to keep doing commissions instead of just going on hiatus.

SO! if you'd like to get a character drawn, and don't care about a particular scene or story, i'm temporarily doing moderate efforts for only 15$! (five dollars off) something like this; https://www.furaffinity.net/view/35074554/ but one character and no background.

and just as a reminder, i also do minimum efforts for 10$; https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34507903/

and if you aren't in the market for a fullbody, but maybe want some telegram stickers, i do those too! 3 emotive flat(no shading) headshots will run you 10$ (a dollar and a quarter off)

aaaand here's a list of all of my ychs!

sfw;
goose tf
animated icons
romantic couple with heart
cute reptile/dragon holding sign
easter basket

nsfw;
stuck in a wall
presenting on a bed
taur tf (can be made sfw)
female feline dakimakura

finally got sick of the pain and went to the chiropractor as several of you suggested. turns out one of my legs is a bit short, and that has caused my hips to be at an angle, which has in turn bent my spine out of shape a little. not bad enough for scoliosis, but bad enough to pinch some nerves and hurt a lot.
my mom thinks all chiropractors are quacks tho and is terrified he's going to give me a stroke so i also went to the doctor. during an epidemic. honestly i was shocked they even saw me for a non-life-threatening issue, and i've been to that hospital before and the treatment was terrible, but this time i saw a very nice woman and got some meds and a referral to physical therapy. oh and she told me to keep seeing the chiropractor.
i wasn't taking painkillers before because i don't like putting bandaids on broken bones, as it were. this has been a reoccurring problem so i want to actually TREAT it, not just let myself forget i even have it. but, doc did remind me that pain meds like the ones she gave me aren't JUST pain meds, they lower inflammation so the problem doesn't get WORSE.


i'm still not sure i'm comfortable with the idea of the chiropractor adjusting my neck (apparently it's too straight) but at least i'm now getting my lower back issue looked into, and i think the meds are helping me sleep. and you know, being able to sleep is pretty integral for literally all other aspects of health and happiness!

just found out there's an internet-only "convention" going on in may. you can pay 5 or 20 CAD for a vendor slot (less money means just a single icon, more means a full banner). i'm not sure how this will go obviously, but it may be worth a shot if your convention got cancelled and you are really bummed about it. 'panels' will be chatrooms or livestreams, depending on the person hosting them. i don't think there's any cost for that, you just have to be approved. no cost for just being there, either, as far as i know. again, not sure how it's gonna go but it's a nice idea considering all the quarantines.

check it out; https://cozycononline.com/#

first of all i'm aware that me hating feelings is, in itself, a feeling. ya don't need to point that out. with that out of the way, i'm going to bitch for a bit.

i hate that you don't have to have even the slightest intention to hurt someone in order to do so.
i hate that hurting others unintentionally usually results in them intentionally hurting you, and that many people think this is fair.
i hate that people who get along and could be great friends are at each others' throats because they don't feel the same way about one or two things.
i hate that people believe the way they feel is the law of the universe, and that everyone else is just wrong.
i hate that feelings affect so much about us so easily and yet are almost impossible to control.
i hate that all the rational thought we are gifted as a species is NOTHING in the face of the instincts we share with so many more 'primitive' species.
i hate that feelings don't have an off switch.
i hate that negative feelings stick with me and control me while positive ones are forgotten.
i hate how people will agree with you '100%' but then make exceptions, so you never actually know where you stand with someone until it's too late.
i hate that people believe looking out for yourself is the same thing as taking pleasure in hurting others.
i hate that everyone seems to think of things in terms of good and evil, when both are entirely made-up concepts, which have different definitions for everyone, and mean nothing in the long term.
i hate that i can't have friends anymore because i'm terrified that if i let them see through my eyes for even a moment, they might decide that all the kindness i've ever shown them and all the good times we've had together are meaningless in the face of a single disagreement.
i hate that nobody seems to understand that we are all the product of our past, and that just because someone isn't a good fit for you doesn't mean they deserve to suffer.
i hate that people will confidently judge your actions without knowing a single thing about what you've been through or how you see things differently than they do.

is it worth it to wait a few days/hours to post something at particular times? sometimes it seems to help, sometimes it doesn't. i'm about done with my best piece yet, and i wanna make sure it gets as much attention as possible. but i also just wanna hurry up and post it XD y'all think i should wait till 8pm friday?

goin' on a trip to see relatives this weekend with the time tayoh got off that we were originally going to go to furthemore with. we will be right near the area where the con is tho, so if you are going and want to hangout, let me know!

i'm also working on three rather large commissions right now... and the list of ideas i have for personal art has gotten rather overwhelming. probably won't be open for new coms for a while!

current list is over on my nsfw account cuz that's the main source of coms for me right now; https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9386754/

also, the next time i hit a watcher milestone i'm going to do the raffle a bit differently. currently i plan to have multiple winners, using a random name picker from NOT random groups;

-characters i find appealing
-people who need art the most
-comments that made me smile
-folks whose name i recognize due to frequently faving/commenting
-everyone else

tho that's kind of a lot so it'd probably only be busts or icons. maybe more if i wait to do the next raffle at 1k.

yet again my mattress has betrayed me and i can no longer reach rem sleep. i lie down, rest my eyes, pass time a little faster, but constantly toss and turn and when i eventually get up i am not rested.

i can't work like this. i simply don't have the mental energy to art, or the physical energy for anything else.

and this is a reoccurring problem. we've tried soft mattresses, firm mattresses, cheap mattresses, expensive mattresses, the couch, the floor, nothing helps me sleep for more than a few months before everything turns back to pain and sleeplessness. and of course i have no idea who to talk to to figure this shit out. the people at the mattress stores exist to sell things, not help with sleep issues. nobody seems to have as much difficulty as me so online reviews are worthless to me. i'm tired of wasting money on mattresses that won't last more than a year. but i don't know what else to do. i need sleep.

i prefer a softer feeling mattress, and being swaddled in blankets in a freezing room. but soft mattresses seem to cause pain, whereas firm ones don’t, except of course if they are as firm as the floor. either my hips and shoulder hurt, my thighs hurt, or my lower back hurts, always, right away or after a few weeks to a few months of using the mattress.

i dunno if they're just not designed for someone to lay on them for as long as i do at a time or what. i'm not even 200 pounds, i don't know why this is so difficult.

i just want to sleep. i just want to be able to get my work done. this is such bs.

reminder that when fa goes down, you can find me on weasyl, if you need to contact me about a commission or somethin'

https://www.weasyl.com/~alphagodith
https://www.weasyl.com/~alphagodith
https://www.weasyl.com/~alphagodith

i don't post EVERYTHING there and i'm pretty much inactive when fa is online, but it does exist and i do go there when fa is offline.

working through my queue slowly but steadily. should have two more pieces finished and posted later today, and then i'll be able to take some more custom commissions, while my lovingly whipped husband works on lining The Big One for me.

are a lot of thumbnails on fa, particularly newly uploaded submissions, broken for everyone else or is it just me?

it's happening for me again. seems to be a periodical thing. by the time anyone sees this, it'll probably be back to normal again. so weird.

my friend  talakestreal has been in a shitty situation for a long time and might finally have a way out, but she needs help. i can't take a bunch of commissions on to fund raise MYSELF, but she's got a lot of ychs and things open and her art is lovely. she's a real nice lady whose had a real rough time and i've known her in person for years now, so help her out if ya can, and buy some art from her! everything she's got is 3$-15$ (but of course donations/tips would be wonderful)

clean art
monochrome headshots - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34869348/
colored headshots - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34869363/
dragon ychs - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34868976/
ychs - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34868995/
spiral badges - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34869324/

nsfw ychs
females - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34869126/
bondage - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34869094/
dragons - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34869069/

tayohshadowind tayohshadowindtayohshadowind

today my lovely dumbass husband is 29 years old! if you feel like being nice, go wish him a happy birthday. i have a gift for him i will be posting a bit later (he's already seen it i'm just waiting to post cuz optimal viewing times) which will also be a clone ych thing, tho i can't take orders for it immediately because of other commissions i need to do first.

tayohshadowind tayohshadowindtayohshadowind

(at least until i do another freebie event, which, who KNOWS when i might do that)

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34600834/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34600834/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34600834/

in about 14 hours, i'm drawing the winner with a random name picker. i haven't met my goal with new watchers so there will only be one winner this time. i intended the prize to be artistic freedom but i never actually specified that, so i'll be taking the winner's request into consideration. if the winner takes too long to get back to me or only wants something on my nope list, i'll draw a different winner.

i still need 31 new watchers to make it to the next milestone where i add a second winner to my free art raffle. sorry to all my watchers for the reminder spam, i promise it'll be over soon! XD little over a week left, and then it'll be back to art only. well, maybe a reminder here and there for like, my valentine's ych. but definitely not every single day. i hate doing that >.<

belatedly celebrating the 500 watcher milestone! come february 1st, i will be using a random name picker to choose one lucky person to get a free, moderate effort full body. if we get up to 600 watchers before the end date, i will pick an additional winner! also, in honor of valentine's day, you can upgrade your free single fullbody to two fullbodies for 10$, aka 75% off.

to enter in the raffle, you must;

1. be watching me (if you don't like my art enough to stay watching after the raffle ends, why would you even enter to win some in the first place?)
2. leave a comment on the raffle submission politely expressing your desire to enter the raffle
3. provide a link to a visual reference of the character you would like drawn as your prize in your entry comment. if you have multiple characters and don't care which one it is, please link all of them (if you have more than three, please link a gallery instead of each individual) and if you win i will simply pick the one that inspires me the most. if you would like to upgrade your prize to the two-character option by paying 10$, say so in the comment(but don't send the money until i contact you for the win and tell you to do so. you will not get your money back if you send it early and don't win)

if i don't respond to your comment with something like 'you're registered', you are not entered into the raffle!!! this could be because i just haven't gotten to it yet, or because you did something wrong.

you can INCREASE YOUR CHANCES (get your name entered again for up to 4 total entries) by;

1. adding the raffle submission to your favorites
2. creating a journal advertising the raffle (you must link to said journal in your initial entry comment, and the journal must link back to the raffle submission)
3. make a post about the raffle on ONE of the following sites; twitter/facebook/tumblr (you must link the post or a screenshot of it in your initial entry comment. also, the post must link back to the raffle submission. lastly, if on twitter or tumblr, tag me. username is the same as here.)



so, tldr; haha no. if you didn't read all that and did it wrong, that's your fault. no free art for you.

i know i've been doing a lot of art lately but that's gonna be put on pause for a while. got some max effort commissions and as some of you may have noticed, those tend to eat up all my time and effort for like... months at a time. these pieces aren't series' like that last one was, and it's nothing too unfamiliar, so hopefully it won't be a whole friggin' half a year before i finish them, but i'll definitely be posting far less frequently until they're done.
i still intend to host a raffle soon, tho. i'm thinkin' i might start it on the 14th, give it till the end of the month, and then i can have the prizes completed by valentine's day. it'll only be single characters, but i think i'll let the winner add another character for half price.

so i kinda wanted to do a raffle when i hit 500 watchers, but at the time i was kinda busy and also super depressed so it didn't happen. i'm gonna do one, but i'm not sure WHEN i should do it? or how long i should give folks to enter? i was thinking i'd have it start on the first of a month and end on the last day of the same month, but i'm not sure which month to do it for, or if that's even too long...
february would work i guess but for some reason i don't wanna do a raffle at the same time i'm doing a seasonal sale... (valentine's thing is open again; https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26334730) i don't have a good reason for it tho. hm... a raffle could be like a gift to single people? maybe?

i've also been wary to do raffles at all because i got in trouble a while ago for 'encouraging spam' by stating folks had to post a journal to enter, or something like that. apparently that rule is gone now tho... so... i was figurin' a comment and watch would be all that was needed for one ticket, but a journal would get an extra 2 tickets and a submission an extra 3. (only one of each tho cuz even without the spam rule i don't want to ACTUALLY encourage spamming)

also am not opposed to the idea of there being more than one prize if i get enough entries, but i'm not sure how many entries i should require per prize. i'm definitely not doing 'tiers' of prizes tho... no first place gets fullbody while second place gets headshot kinda deal. never liked those. makes sense for a CONTEST but with a raffle it just... i dunno, feels like it kinda sucks the joy out of winning, when you win but don't win as good as someone else did, when it's entirely a matter of luck.
also if i do the whole multiple prizes thing i'm gonna limit it so nobody can win more than once, no matter how many tickets they have. just seems unfair.

prize'd be either a full or half body of my preferred style (painterly, moderate effort) like these; https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34543469/ https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34488955/ do y'all like that style? it's my fave so i kinda wanna drop cell and soft altogether but i wanna know what you guys think.