bunch of stress and junk in real will have room again soon maybe...

*lurks forevers*

yep im lazy in updating this, so how are you?

LAYER ONE : THE OUTSIDE
- Name: Ampzero, Josh
- Eye Color: Blue/green-grey
- Hair Style/Color: black
- Height: 5'10"
- Clothing style: T-shirts and jeans.
- Best physical feature: Eyes and thick hair?

LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE
- Your fears: Pain, being chased by stuff, horror stuff.... being torn apart by someone both psychically and mentally
- Your guilty pleasure: Video games, being able to eat whatever and not gain weigh?
- Your biggest pet peeve: explaining things more then 5 times
- Your ambitions for the future: I got no ambition atm XD

LAYER THREE: THOUGHTS
- Your first thoughts waking up: FUCK i didn't sleep enough or that dream was insane!
- What you think about most: regrets,bad decisions, people I have hurt or have hurt me.... LOOK here this what i feel most of the time.....
- What you think about before bed: did I forget to do anything?
- You think your best quality is: I'm a very caring/nice person.

LAYER FOUR: WHAT'S BETTER?
- Single or group dates: Single
- To be loved or respected: respected
- Beauty or brains: uhhh.... idk XD
- Dogs or cats: cats

LAYER FIVE: DO YOU?
- Lie: sometimes
- Believe in yourself: sometimes
- Believe in love: no... my heart won't accept it... you have to pry open my heart
- Want someone:: I am alone all the time what you think??? ;3;

LAYER SIX: EVER?
- Been on stage: YES!!!! (very proud of that)
- Done drugs: fff only prescription for something XD
- Changed who you were to fit in: I am clay to be molded all the time

LAYER SEVEN: FAVORITES
- Favorite color: blue/green
- Favorite animal: cheetah, snow leopards, sharks, orca, dragons, wolves, most animals
- Favorite movie: um... i don't remember
- Favorite game: monster hunter 3

LAYER EIGHT: AGE
- Day your next birthday you will be: June 9th
- How old will you be: 22
- Age you lost your virginity: VIRGIN STILL
- Does age matter: not really, unless like big difference maybe

LAYER NINE: IN A BOY OR GIRL
- Best personality: nice, sweet, caring, loving, awesome, random
- Best eye color: green, blue idk XD
- Best hair color: anything, just not to bright if dyed XD
- Best thing to do with a partner: I don't know never had

LAYER TEN: FINISH THE SENTENCE
- I love: to be happy if i can be.
- I feel: tired, dreading some decisions i need to make.
- I hide: my batteries :D
- I miss: playing games with people
- I wish: my concision wasn't so strong it hurts me and reminds me constantly about my regrets

LAYER ELEVEN: I TAG


 vessi
 candykimur
 zoey03

So for about 5 years... Even before I was on FA, In public or around people I don't know, I just Picture in my head wings ripping painfully or sometimes with no pain out of my back... ( I think it was set off more~ in my head with DMFA by  missmab http://missmab.com/Comics/Vol_884.php )

( this http://www.ginpu.us/2007/08/17/08172007/ is what started the pain thought of it being painful or EXTEMELY painful... as a tradeoff for getting them have also thought of them growing overtime as a tradeoff this was a few months after DMFA)

Then would think.. what would people think... how would they react.... how would they feel... what would they say... would they love me? would they fear me? .... would I be all alone/ingored? ... would I be suddenly be noticed? all going through my head whenever I have a second to think... whenever I walk in public places like college, schools, fairs, malls, anywhere there is people I don't know and is quiet enough...

I also plan for if it ever happens in my head... as in I think about if I would duck down or jump to the side so it does not hit anyone or hurt them if they come out or sit in the middle or back of the room as they would be big ... or splatter blood everywhere... and breath heavy from the pain...

Would they try to get it off me? as if a parasite? no... I would fight them off... waiting so long for them I don't want them to be damaged... I have even thought about have a note with me just incase says these "beautiful wings of mine are real... don't remove them..."

Please don't laugh.... Its something that's deep in my heart and deep in my thoughts all be it I have not had many dreams of flying to often... I have dreams of falling and them bursting out to save me though and I wake up...

Just thought I would share something about me... That I have not told anyone about this...

Anyone have something like this? or just your thoughts on it? comments?

*edit only thing diff on this one is this I forgot to add that they would be blue and white maybe? or maybe like fursonas? *