I finally have a camera that I can upload pictures online to, so if I make anything I enjoy, or anything that is sentimental to myself I will post it. I'll try to simply and securely post only furry things though, or things related to my furry life, so I don't bore people with non-furry art hehehe... seeing as how this -is- FurAffinity. Anyways, I'll still post any writing I do, and now I'll be able to post any appropriate artwork I do. Well, here it goes I guess, heh. Anyways, here we go, time to see what comes of my art! (Lawlz! If it can be considered art yet! ><'' )

Alright, I'm almost entirely through my Basic Drawing and Composition class, and I've gotten okay at my art, I actually had an important assignment that was to choose an artist and emulate their style, I chose Goldenwolfen and I emulated her eye with the universe inside it, and the reflection of the mountains within it. I actually drew this very well, in my opinion, and almost everyone in my class was amazed, this young nervous, shy boy just drew that? When he was drawing really horrid chairs before?

Anyways - supposedly around April 27'th (my 20'th birthday) I may be getting a camera that can connect to the computer, if I do, I will take pictures of some of my artwork and post it on here. The problem is, even though my teacher says it's perfectly legal and fine to copy an artists picture as long as you don't sell it or anything (and I won't) and give them credit and so on, and you can emulate an artist all you want. I was considering posting the eye on here and seeing what people think, but before my birthday I'm going to start being more brave about my art and drawing much more furry, beautiful, spiritualistic (almost) artwork with my charcoal and my color pastels.

What kind of artist am I? Mainly I write, but I do love using charcoal and pastels now, I'm a little confused, I wonder if I can even call myself an artist! I guess that would be up to you all once I actually start posting things after April 27'th or so.

Anyways, Ideas?! Thoughts?! I wonder if anyone will even notice I've started drawing?! No one seems to like poetry or stories unless they're yiffy! I like yiffy things as much as the next fur, but I like beautiful, spiritual, artistic drawings as well! Making love beside a lit fireplace, nothing really revealed, two shadowed figured, gleaming half lidded eyes, lips locked, holding one another... that is beauty to me! I'd look at that picture all day long!

Anyways, again, thoughts? Should I write more yiffy poetry and stories? My drawing most definitely won't ever be like that... but.. meh. Anyways, see you later!

I'm taking a Intermediate Creative Writing class this semester, so expect to see more work from me... I'm going to start pushing more of my furry nature into my work, well, furry or scaley nature into my work. Either way, I'll be writing more "story beginnings" like Rebirth of Love, or Shade (I wish I could just... "continue" with those, but that's not how my mind works... I have to keep finding inspiration, and if I finally find a story that just.. leaps out of me page after page and I can't stop, or one that I desperately want to revisit, then I will)

I've recently discovered more about myself, and what I like or dislike and I'm becoming more passionate about what I do like. I love dragons, I love spiritual or emotional beauty (the kind where you can sit on the top of a hill and gaze down over the tree and grass filled plain and watch the sun sparkle and come up over the hill so that everything feels like it is alive as one) and so because of those two things, I think more of my artwork will be about dragons/spiritualism/emotionalism that is meant to take breath away and fill the page with my passion.

Anyways, hope to talk to all of you amazing ones very soon..!

Yeah yeah, I'm here. I'm around. Don't get your hopes up it's just around the christmas time that I'm -allowed- to have a furry-life.

I'm so frustrated, everyone always tells me "Hey let's go to Further confusion!" and I'm like "Oh yeah I'll definitely - Oh wait, college starts those days" or "Oh wait, I don't have the money" or so on so forth...

It makes me feel bad as a furry, everyone always mentions going, and how awesome it is and so on, and I just feel like I'm a wanna-be furry that says I am but doesn't do anything in the fandom. UGH! >< So frustrated at my situation. So stressed. AND IT'S NEAR CHRISTMAS!!!

Oh by the way, MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL OF YOU LOVED ONES ^^ all of you that read this, loves yah!

Oh and by the way, I'm posting a strange new story I'm working on as all of your christmas presents. Don't get excited, it probably sucks D:< It's just the way muh luck is going! ANYWAYS! Since I'm out of college for a few weeks (2 or so) I'll try and get on and visit with all you loved ones as much as possible. Anyways, posting the story, DEAL WITH IT!

P.S. Yes, I wrote this at 4:10 or so in the morning, I can't get to sleep, I'm bored, I miss everyone, I feel bad cause of stuffs and DEAL WITH IT! ><!!?!?!!
P.S.S. It's 4:30 and I still can't sleep. I'm gonna go throw myself out the window into the snow now, KKTHXBAI :D!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!? I'M NOT INSANE I SWARR! Just kidding, gnight.
P.S.S.S. I just had to spell "gnight" -literally- 30 times before I got it down right, I think I'm finally getting crazy tired! YAY SLEEP! gn- Oh no, not again!

They annoy the HELL out of me!

Oy vey, I've been seeing more and more people lately saying "I'm a better person than you" or "I'm better than animal kind because I'm human" I tend to highly disagree. You're more evolved, but you're more barbaric, brutal, and sometimes "instincts" isn't an excuse when you beat down your mate, or try to get someone to kill themselves. Animals don't do that, which again backs up my point that some humans are just way barbaric, yet still they have the gall to shout "Oh I'm better than you" or "Animals are practically just meant for human property" and crap.

People like that piss me off.. especially those that not only abuse animals, but think that animals aren't as good as humans are. That's plain pathetic, we evolved from them you morons! You were no better at acting on your instincts when we were a younger race as well! You're evolved, so you're better? Hell no, if they evolve, they may very well become the ones ruling us and calling us the pathetic beings, and because of those narcissistic morons who starved their dog or kicked it often, I'll think they'll almost have a right to. Almost. Not quite, but almost.

People are just making me more and more pissed off at them lately.. seriously.. grow up. UGH..

I just lost the Game! REDICULOUS! CRAZY! AHHHHHH! But, I still lost..

Yes it's true! My teacher kicked me out of Photoshop after I missed two assignments! I just tried to log on one day and bam, It was gone! I emailed her, No response! Called the skewl - "You been booted for lack of participation" LAWL! XD The teacher can bite me! My life is ovah! I'm SCR00D!

Gawd though, now that my giddy frantic ranting is done, emoness kicks in ~.~ Wow that makes me feel pathetic and sad, I didn't even think two assignments would get me booted, jebus, what the hell. I don't even get a second chance, don't even get a warning, and it wasn't in the syllabus. It feels stupid to be kicked after so little.

I've been busy with college re-starting the next semester, I'm taking PHOTOSHOP! YAAAY! Let's see if I can actually, like, zomg, learn to make something that atleast looks half-good? wewt? ANYWAYS...

If you get a weird posting on one of your journals or submissions, and you got it like 4 weeks after the thing was posted, that's just me FINALLY getting back on here, cleaning up messages and re-keeping in touch with you on some level! <3 Anyways, cya around..!

Just figured I'd explain that.

I'm working on Part 2 of 'Rebirth of Love - Foxxy Style' and hopefully I'll have it done in the next few nights. This one, suprisingly, isn't about the star of the epilogue and part one. This one and perhaps the next one will be a bit more different, about other characters.

These will be extremely difficult to do because I happen to have most of my long term ideas for this story laid out now, I just need to keep it exciting or interesting (or atleast, I guess, keep you pawing) until the story reaches its climax (maybe in more ways than one, we'll see!)

Anyways, Part 2 is on the way, I really havn't caluclated how many parts I'll be making for it yet, I don't like to set limits, atleast not until I get near to the end.

Anyways, I guess I'll just hint that this one is about the Wolf Demoness, Rein. I'm trying to find someone to draw a picture of her for me, if I can't find anyone then screw it I'll just use the black rose as a thumbnail, or perhaps my blue foxxies picture again. Anyways, that's all that's going on lately.. Oh..

and please, have an extremely Merry Christmas.

This song is by Thrice

Title: "Stare At The Sun"

"I sit here clutching useless lists,
keys for doors that don't exist..
I crack my teeth on pearls.
I tear into the history,
Show me what it means to me in this world,
Yeah, in this world..

'Cause I am due for a miracle,
I'm waiting for a sign.
I'll stare straight, into the sun -
And I won't close my eyes...
..Til I understand, or go blind.

I see the parts but not the whole,
I study saints and scholars both..
No perfect plan unfurls.
Do I trust my heart or just my mind,
Why is truth so hard to find in this world..?
Yeah.. In this world.

'Cause I am due for a miracle,
I'm waiting for a sign.
I'll stare straight, into the sun -
And I won't close my eyes...
..Til I understand, or go blind.

I know that there's a point I've missed,
A shrine or stone I havn't kissed,
A scar that never graced my wrist -
A mirror that hasn't met my fist..
But I can't help feeling like.. I'm..

Due for a miracle..
I'm waiting for a sign..
I'll stare straight, into the sun..
And I won't close my eyes..

Due for.. A miracle..
I'm waiting for a sign,
I'll stare straight, into the sun..
And I won't close my eyes."

One of my all time favorite songs, As I am a poet and a writer, the words behind the songs mean much more to me than the beat and rhythm, of course, those are pretty darn important too! Though, the words mean more to me, because they have.. deeper meaning.

It's almost time for three tails, now, I'm growing up, and aging, and so is my body. Two tails for quite a while now, but approaching fast is my natural time to grow a third tail! With it comes many changes, perhaps even an overall new look - I'm thinking black.. black and tan.. some of you probably already know what I have in mind, but maybe I'll somehow work up some money and commission someone to draw my Kitsunevolution. Ahhh! Pokemon referance! It burns! My eyes/ears, they bleed! Anyways, Been obsessed overly with Naruto Shippuden and Bleach lately, getting the Bleach: Shattered Blade game for the wii, and also Naruto: Clash of Ninja Revolution for the wii.. Can't wait to play as that little pink haired girl from Bleach that calls everyone by silly nicknames - I'll totally own people with her because no one expects much from her, cept.. She really does rock. Anyways, just an update.. and again.. THREE TAILS! Three! Count them! *Swish* one *Swish* two and.. well.. very, very soon officialy a third swish. Anyways, Please leave me messages, or chat with me on MSN (I'm on here and there, been super, incredibly, astoundingly busy with college). Anyways, yeah.

"The Wheel of Time turns, and Ages come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the Age that gave it birth comes again..." "There are neither beginnings nor endings to the turning of the Wheel of Time. But it was a beginning." - Robert Jordan, The Wheel of Time.

Please rest well, Robert Jordan - The Author to "The Wheel of Time" series... You, and every character I came to love will forever hold a place in my heart.

Your enchanted lands, and your beautiful portrayel of the feelings and insides of people in this mystical world will never be forgotten. I shed not one, two, or three tears for you, Jordan. I weep fully.

I have not just lost a friend.. a family member, despite not knowing him.. I have lost an entire branch of my family tree. You, the characters in your books, the villains in your books.. They were all a part of me - and I feel as though their endings have been torn out. I feel as though some people close to me have suddenly been ripped away by the fabric of time.

I'll miss the world I lost myself in for hours upon hours a day, the people I grew to know so well.. but most of all, I'll miss the man behind the feelings, the man behind my great escape..

Rest well.. My hero.

Well, Another update as to my constant seeming absence in my life currently.

Turns out the car crash my parents walked away from wasn't without cost.
Dad has some major neck problems, mom complains of arm numbness from time to time, I'm worried, of course I am. Not to mention, If any of you have heard of the National Emergency called for a fire in California, it would be the one that is right outside my town - Just my luck right now, huh? And guess what - It's heading for our city, they're already evacuating people. Not to mention, due to all of this, I find it hard to study for college, or even be able to log on to my online classes to post my answers, my grades are slipping little by little.

I'm going to post a new poem that I just wrote about the crash, and the fire, and my grades, this can't possibly be a mid-life crisis at the age of 18, Can it? No, That can't be possible.. but this pain, this worry, constant anxiety, feeling that everywhere I turn my breath is being torn from my lungs - If this can't possibly be a mid-life crisis, I have no idea how I'll take my mid-life crisis when it comes.

Anyways, Sorry for the drama, posting my new poem -

Save My Day


P.S. This is what my comment on my page was talking about. Again, sorry for the drama.

Yeah, I'm back and finally working on and posting on here and stuff again, but I'm gonna take it easy a little while on here, college just started, so I'm swamped with that - not to mention I have some other things I need to do that will eat up my time, which means my story is going to have to wait, siigh..
Anyways, some people asked, so I figured I'd just say it here, I'm just stating it as fact, and they're fine, so don't be worried or anything.

Remember, they're fine..

My parents got into a car accident the other day, sandwhiched between two other cars (Rear and Front), they had to slow to a near stop because of something ahead of them, and the car behind them didn't see and was still going the same speed on the highway/freeway (his car was completely totalled) funny though, my dad prides his truck on being so tough (Ford, Built Tough) and I'm glad it was. The car that hit him was still going the full speed which I'm assuming is like 70+, yet my parents truck has only scrapes and minor dents, whereas this guys cars front end is now visitting his windshield permenantly. As well, the truck in front was rear ended because they were hit so hard it pushed them into the truck (also stopped) in front of them.. he had a damaged rear end as well, but again, my dads trucks front end only took minor issues. The thing is, since his truck IS built so tough, airbags didn't deploy, and it snapped their heads forward suddenly, they are both complaining of quite a lot of neck pain, and my dad has previous neck problems - so that's not good. I'm sure they'll be fine though, because they assure me they'll be fine. Wow, huge post about this, anyways - That's what happened if you wanted to know, if not, oh well. Funny, though, ford IS built tough, if they HAD actually taken my moms little SUV, they would be in the hospitol, Thank you - Ford!

Anyways, that's the story, it's days past the incident, but I'm kinda hanging out with em more downstairs around the house and such, Dunno why, just am, I don't question it. Anyways, That's a reason I'm so busy, along with all my swamping college homework, tests, and studying, and the other unnamed reasons I'm away alot - So, there you have it.. Cya around.

Starting this Saturday, I will be gone until next thursday *Sniffs* and.. and.. I will miss you all so very much! *Cries!* SO DARN MUCH T.T Wait, the place I'm going has computers, too.. with online connections... Psh, Nevermind then, Screw you all >:O Hehe, I'm just kidding ^^ I will be on a trip, and checking my Furaffinity less since I'll be at friends who don't know I'm.. uh.. a furry.. Sad day when discrimination makes you hide who you really are, but, I'd rather hide myself then lose friends and get beat up or something >.> anyways! I'll check in here and there, but if I miss a message or something, I'm sorry, I'll get to it as soon as I can X.x;; Not that many people send me messages x.X;;


Anyways, I'm trying to write more poetry lately, but I'm having a bit of difficulty coming up with new and interesting subjects.. As well, Part 2 of my story is going to take a bit, I'm struggling with how I'm going to plunge him into the outside world.. but I'm sure I will come up with something. Anyways, Buh Bye!

It seems lots of people are having relationship problems, family or friend problems (like, they got hurt or.. lost someone) lately. Lots of sadness going around, it's almost enough to make me burst into tears right off the bat - and I don't want -any- of you to try and cheer me up, don't cheer me up, I'm not the one who lost someone close to them, I'm just someone watching their loss from a distance, and wishing I could make it all better.

Your comforting words should be for them, hold them, smile for them, tell them it will be okay. Someday, you may hurt, and they will see it, and remember how you helped them through their own difficulties, and will come to hold your paw, and share your pain.

"My heart beats not for myself, but for every other" is my quote.. and I love it, and I mean it every day of my life. I feel your pain, furkind, I sympathize, and I wish I could make you feel better - but as I can't directly take your pain away.. "When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you, and your best friend will be there." - Unknown

*Takes a stand by your side, whoever you are, and takes your paw in mine, standing firm, determined.* I wont let go. I'll walk with you through this pain, and I'll do what I can to brighten the dark path that has been temporarily set before you. Just remember one thing, this dark path -is- only temporary.. and the darkness can only survive as long as the candle of your heart flickers. The stronger and brighter the flame of your heart, the hope, and the defeat of such pain, the less darkness will surround you. *Grips your paw, and begins walking* Even if I have to take the first few steps for you.. I'll see you through.

Yes, It's true, I've started writing my love/yiffstory today. Thanks to solar_vertigo for completing and giving me my new avatar and the wonderfully beautiful piccy of my blue foxishness ^-^

Thanks to that morale booster, I've now completed 3 paragraphs of my story, I think, after I get about ten paragraphs, I'll post is as part one.

--==WARNING==--: The beginning of my story is rather sad, or depressing, but it builds into something much happier, so please bear with it! The yiff may not necessarily begin in section one, or perhaps it will? Who knows, ten paragraphs does get you a good bit into the beginnings of the story.. and the love will come much later.

Again, Thank you so much Solar for my morale booster ^-^ Let the ending of paragraph 3 mark the beginning of a new era! Known as.. Paragraph 4! By the way.. The name of the story is -

Rebirth of Love - Foxxy Style Prt. 1

I should HOPEFULLY have it posted by the end of tonight, or tommorow.. Then I'll need you all to try and nudge me to writing the second part ^^

--==PROLOGUE FINISHED==--
Posting it.

--==PART ONE FINISHED==--
Posting it.

Yes, That's right, Part 1 to Rebirth of Love - Foxxy Style is finished! I've posted it now and if you want a love story and yiff story mix, go ahead for a read, there are tons of emotions, but also plenty of yiff scenes. In part 1, Anilothei does some stuff in the shower by himself ^-^ Enjoy!

That's it! You all have inspired me too much! Thanks to Emerald, Iram, Selianth, Silverpaw, Garra, Solar, Zen & Icylon (btw, You two are absolutely adorable together.. and prolly wont ever see this <.<), And everyone im watching, will watch, and are watching me.. You all are jerks! You've inspired me too much!

Now look, I'm sitting here, and going through the beginning steps of a Lovestory, and a Yiffstory (Two different stories), All thanks to all of you D: Every single one D: GAWSH, JUST MAKE MY LIFE HARDER WITH ALL YOUR INSPIRATION WONT YOU!? T.T

Naw, I love you all ^^ You all are my heroes, now if only I could think of some names, a fluent plotline, and an enticing story that people would actually look at and comment upon... Anyways, Hopefully I'll have a 'part' or 'section' of the storyline within 2 weeks (I'm lazy! Shaddup!) Anyways.. I wonder if anyone would want to read either one of the stories I'm going to come up with about furries.. Lovestory, or Yiffstory.. hm.. well.. I guess there's only one way to find out..

Oh, But so far Day 3 has yielded me meeting many more friends.. Everyone is so wonderful, and so kind and loving.. It makes me feel so warm and happy *Smiles* Love you all, You're like my huge furry family.. ^^

Cya around, and by the way.. Feel free to message me on YIM, AIM, or MSN (I'm mainly on MSN, and AIM, Occasionaly on Yahoo) I'll get back to you ASAP!!!! <3 you all! *Goes back to surfing Furaffinity and meeting even more wonderful furries.*

Oh wow, I made it another day without completely screwing up and somehow esploding my page or something.. ^^

I'm so proud of myself for not screwing up too bad! I think I've made some good new friends, now I just need to keep in touch with all these wonderful people ^^

Although, today I've been slow on responses and such because.. uhm.. I'm utterly exhausted! Had to get up and take my brother to school super early (I didn't get as much sleep as I'd hoped..) and started getting to that crazy point of tired where.. like.. you find yourself waiting at a stop light and blink.. but.. forget to open your eyes again? Yeah.. Lol, It was funny, I had some old man honk once, I was only out of it for like 10 seconds but.. you know, fast world of 'driving around town' cause people to get impatient!

Oh wow, I didn't think I could get anymore tired.. but I am.. I think.. I might go take a nap now, Maybe I'll check in in a little bit (did I just double in? Wow, I must be tired, hehe.. Wait.. did I just say double in and not giggle? ...hehehehehehe.. that was totally accidental..!) Anyways ^^ I'll see everyone in a while.. Gnight! *Passes out drooling on keyboard*

Wows.. I'm very nervous! Today is the second day I've been on Furaffinity and everyone seems so nice, friendly, and kind ^^ I love all this art, so much expression, so much emotion..! Hehehee.. It's almost overwhelming me, I'm sooo happy.. ^-^; hehe.. Oh but I am still just getting the hang of this and.. still get confused about this thing or that.. It's all so fun here but I'm such a simple soul who is rather oblivious to most things unless someone points it out >< erp.. I'm blushing now.. I already made a few mistakes and feel absolutely silly..! But oh well.. I can't take them back, my only option left is to move forward, maybe I'll buy a scanner and try a hand at posting some of my own artwork.. it's rather flat and dull, though.. ><;; I'll learn..!

But..Ahhhhh, I keep messing up, I comment on cute pics to people who only have favorites lists! I'm so embaressed! *Covers face with his paws* I feel so silly! Oh I wish there was a way to make it better..

But I wont stop +Watching those people with only favorites lists.. because.. uhm.. well.. I like their taste in art? ^^;;; *Covers face with both paws, AND his twin blue tails..* I'm such a doof..! Oh wow, though.. I am beginning to love this site more and more..