Layla is a five minutes PG (ish) animation, but with some adult themes, and is could be considdered NSFW in many places.
Be careful when watching.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ayE46o9VP2Y

I really like this story, and the presentation, and I watched it more than once.

But at the same time I also found it a little frustrating, and saddening. Given the many fascinating and/or horrifying things that Layla's existance implies are probably happening just off camera.

Layla is an irrisponsible Mary Poppins, and a unique being, and a person, as opposed to an mass produced AI programme in a mass produced robot body. And she ninja-vanishes, before any awkward questions get raised. It's almost like the story chose to open a magic box, gained access forbidden mysteries, only to run out the door moments later. Frustratingly, in the same place most similar stories close things off.

After all, let's not ask...
How did a kid steal a fem-bot without anyone noticing?
If Layla style robots exist, is there any job they can't do? Are there any human jobs left? Does that spiral up to where the robots are super cheap (which might explain how easy it was to nab one) or downwards to where no one has the money to afford one?
What happens if Layla didn't leave, and after a week the boy's shock has worn off? Frankly, kids are curious, and do dumb things, and I'd expect that to culminate in some very NSFW 2nd-base esque situations.
Does Layla have age-lockouts or a rating system? If yes, was she trolling earlier? What are her factory settings? Can they be changed? And who sets the limits on what is allowed? If no,, why not, and what deos that say about the culture the kids are growing up in?
Speaking of which teenagers do even sillier things than kids, and with Layla esque robots, they presumably have extra motivation to do so. Is that a valid form of sex ed? How many of us would become 'old men yelling at clouds' about opposing the wrong form of sex ed?
Adults exist too. And while relationships are important, let's not cheap Laylas remove a source of sercity for a highly desirable resource. How will that affect dating? Adult relationships? Marriage? Advertising? Will sex sell products if everyone has access to it on tap?
What happens to crime if we dump a few million mobile 'CCTVs cameras' into an area, which never sleep? Can they just record, or can they call the cops too? Can the cops look through their eyes, remotely-deputise them on the spot, and order them to intervene in an ongoing situation?

Obviously uo can'#t cover most of this in a five minute short. But you can leave scope for answers existing by not pulling off the ninja-vanish trick, implying this was a special snowflake magical and unique moment. As opposed to making it clear this is a foretaste of the rest of their childhood, and what their adult hood will be after that.

Had a fun conversation with my Boss yesterday about COVID-19, and some of it may be relevant to others.

I work from home, have no kids, no serious health issues, and only occasionally travel from work. Not all of my work-mates are in that position, but thankfully most of our work involves remote IT support roles. So even if one or some of us get caught by quarantine (locked in or out) we can mostly continue. Even if schools get closed the parents in our company can support their little darlings at home, and we can continue as best as we can manage. Most of us have elderly relatives though. If they get it, that's serious, and could lead to sudden and prolonged absence from work for the affected staff. We're also going to have to keep an eye on each other's health. (Or they will at least. I'm 50miles away.) And try and minimise risk if we have to do a site visit to any of our clients, but especially the elderly ones. Which includes possibly cautioning them of extra charges if/when we can no longer safely risk public transport.

It may be worth having a look around your office. How many of your co-workers have kids? How well can they cope if schools close suddenly? How easily can people work from home? Are there any supply chains up or down stream that could affect you? If the worst happened, how easily could your company cope with multiple people taking time off on zero notice due to loss of relatives? Possibly those in critical positions?

It may not be your job to think of such things. But disaster management should be someone's job, and even if they've done that job well, 'pandemic' might not be a scenario they've properly considered. If they haven't said anything yet, and they still haven't said anything over the next few weeks, it may be a good idea to give them a poke and ask. It will be extremely nice if this blows over with minimal casualties, but that doesn't seem to be the way things are going. If things do go bad, better to have a plan ahead of time.

Finally got the actual vote numbers

In the brexit corner:
Conservatives: 43.6%
Brexit party: 2.0%
Total: 45.6%

In the remain corner:
Labour: 32.1%
Lib Dem: 11.6%
SNP: 3.9%
Total: 47.6%

Much as the lying scum might claim to represent the will of the people, the people have made it very clear they do not support his keystone policy. Given the choice, the majority voted for parties opposed to Brexit.

And of course Brexit is still a terrible idea that will do terrible damage to the economy, and the young still hate it, and Brexit/Torry supporters are still dying of old age at a rate of 300k per year. And it remains to be seen how many will continue to support Brexit if it actually happens and thru get their face rubbed in how many 'campaign fear' predictions actually start affecting them. And Borris may still be aiming for a no-deal Brexit by sabotaging the future relationship negotiations that will start the moment the withdrawal agreement is signed.

Only hope at this point is that enough tories, especially the new ones, want to be re elected come the next election, and the one after that, and finally have an ohshit moment and realise that will never happen if they support Brexit.

Though given their supporters will kick them out anyway if they don't...

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Fuck you Borris Johnson
We're still in the EU

For those unfamiliar with his work, Pepper Coyote is a singer and song writer, who headed this year's Charity Concert at Eurofurence. One of the songs he sung was 'Driving Into The Sun' a song that sounds like a comedy, but felt like it was building to a tragedy, but then suddenly stopped.

The lyrics to the song as he wrote and sung them:
https://genius.com/Pepper-coyote-dr.....the-sun-lyrics

The next day I felt the need to write what is effectively a second half. Take what you will from me writing this on the last day of the convention, as everything is ending, winding down, and packing away...


Pepper's chorus...
Well alright, it has to get better
At least I can squint as I tumble along
I will not be deterred no we’ve only begun
As I find myself driving into the sun

My guide was there waiting for me when I stood
He carried a scythe and he wore a black hood
My heart fill with fear but back straight I didn't run
Today was my last day driving into the sun

Well alright, it has to get better
I no longer need squint as I stumble along
I will not be afraid no we’ve only begun
On this my last day driving into the sun

He looked big and scary but had a kind face
Gently he told me I'd left the rat race
He showed me his viewpoint of what I had done
Killed myself while driving into the sun

Well alright, it has to get better
Though I feel regret as I ponder my wrongs
I will not be deterred no we’ve only begun
With problems worse than driving into the sun

My actions felt foolish but I'm told, "Feel no shame."
"We all make mistakes, so don't carry the pain."
"It could have been worse, you didn't kill anyone."
"The injured will heal, now walk into the sun."

Well alright, it has to get better
Though I feel regret as I ponder my wrongs
Though I have some assurance, we’ve only begun
I find myself walking into the sun

The golden light didn't come from a disc in the sky
It was blindingly bright but brought no tear to my eye
My old life is over, my new life's begun
With wide open eyes, I walked into the sun

Bright sunlight grows green limes
In vast long well tended lines
While next door the vineyard vines
Grow ripe in the summer times

Then come the dying times
As trees rust in record times
Nights darken and daytimes
Grow short in the autumn times

White frost and clear ice rimes
Ponds while show covers hill inclines
Black trees and other signs
All point to the winter times

Green shoots towards skyward climbs
The start of many new lifetimes
Unless an earnest hunter finds
Them helpless in the spring times

Each season can be sublime
All unique though they also rhyme
Enjoy each as they only chime
Only once throughout your lifetime

Currently just a few signatures short of 5 million, the cancel Brexit petition passed the previous world record holder earlier today. (Change.org's petition against the proposed EU article 13, with 4.2 million)

If you are British, and you haven't signed already, please help us cancel this madness

https://petition.parliament.uk/petitions/241584

Responding to The Tattooed Theist's video...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KdEIHld6_aM
Answering Atheists 3 | Christian Responding to Atheist

He's responding to a number of points by another youtuber called Atheist Voice. In fairness he agrees with many points, but some of his objections are head-desk worthy.

So up front this is a bit of a rant, though I've tried my best to be polite as he did seem to be trying his best to do the same.

# # #

I get the impression that you are sincere, but feel you are failing to tackle some of the finer points of Voice's arguments, and also seem unaware of some of the other aspects of atheist view that Voice skipped over for brevity.


"I was fine with being abused for my lack of faith."
This is one of your weakest arguments. And a rather crass and callous one too; albeit probably not intentionally so.

Firstly because what you experienced was abuse, and they should not have been doing that. But also and mostly because abuse is a scale, and just because you could cope with the level of abuse you endured, doesn't mean others can cope with, or should be subjected to, other levels of abuse elsewhere on that scale. Being kicked out of your house as a child, or fired from your job is not okay. Some atheists (though not Voice presumably) also live in nations where atheism carries the death sentence. So this kinda translates to "I survived being punched once, stop complaining someone hit you with a crowbar and broke multiple bones."

"How do atheists justify the big bang?"
We don't know the cause of the big bang. We also don't know for certain there was a cause for the big bang, since the principles of science and logic we are familiar with seem to break down within a few millionths of a second of the big bang. (Likely due to a flaw in our current knowledge.) Going out on a limb and say that you do know the answer, and the answer is essentially an immortal wizard with such and such characteristics, because of a book written by people who got everything they wrote about the universe wrong, takes more faith than simply repeating the best of our current scientific knowledge. A specific cause also takes more faith than the big bang itself, for which there is overwhelming evidence.

"...and then the fish grew legs and walked onto land..."
There are plenty of resources online that explain how evolution works, and what the evidence is for it. At this point the only way you can hold a view contrary to this is by refusing to look at that evidence. And yes you later criticise this very thing, but you still do it.

"If you come from nothing, then you are nothing and have no value."
And now you're basically expressing a variant of the second thing he complained about. That is not morality works, nor is it how value works. If people can be moral without Christianity, then they can have value without Christianity.

"Why pick on someone of a different faith?"
Because beliefs inform actions. For example, your belief that no christian would ask 'Where do mountains come from?' leads to the false conclusion that such things don't happen, and then to the action of you dismissing it. But have you ever actually meet a young earth creationist? Because they tend to be christian, and tend to ask questions like that. (Including the reverse. Where did the grand canyon come from?!) No, seriously, they really do. Faith can lead to false intuitions and false conclusions if you are not careful. For example the common and false conclusion that global warming isn't real (because god promised he wouldn't flood the world twice) and that the foolish action of voting for politicians who pander to their ignorance, and who pass laws that screw everyone over.

And that quote about not flooding the world twice? That was from an elected member of congress. Do you really want people that stupid writing and passing laws that may affect you negatively? Can you honestly endorse or approve of people voting for someone that profoundly ignorant, and placing their fellow citizens' well-being in potentially serious jeopardy as a result?

If Christians didn't do that, if you acted like trekies or bronies or furries, then no one would care about what you thought. But trekies don't campaign to end all aid to africa because of the prime directive. Bronies don't campaign to release all prisoners because forgiveness always work on the show. Many Christians by contrast keep trying to apply false intuitions and conclusions to the real world, and put their faith into the law - or keep laser focused on that one objective, and ignore all the harmful things politicians are doing when they aren't saying god in public. Because apparently, to a significant and christian voting block in america, if you say god in public, then it doesn't matter what horrible laws you pass, or what horrible effects those laws have.

And sure, 'not all Christians' but enough to put (frankly) stupid and (frankly) sometimes evil people into office, where they can and have done a lot of damage. Criticising and objecting to such conduct is not 'being a child'.

National Novel Writing Month

The formal challenge is for 50,000 words in 31 days. I've managed 10,000 twice and 20,000 once. This time round I'm aiming for 40,000. Currently working on the The Sorcerer's New Wish. Not sure it'll take me that far but as long as I hit the target I don't care if it's an anthology.

Wish me luck. I'll be updating this regularly with progress.

Day 1 - 1521
Day 2 - 2929
Day 3 - 4960

Authors comment on this NSFW art inspired me to write a little creatively for the first time in a month or so.
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/24873158/
Not really worth a submission, so...

She tis indeed a lovely griffin, perched upon a floor of nothin
With silken spots and up thrusting form, tis much here to adore
Odd her expression is displeasing, given what her thighs are squeezing
Clear despite her lust needs easing, something abounds that she does deplore
Thus my health may be served by fleeing, and not trying to attempt rapport
Stepping back, I reclose the door.

A Brief History of US Politics, if they were cats and dogs.

The Independent Cat Party vs the Gregarious Dog Party

Looking back it feels like the Cats have spent the past twenty years telling their followers that The Wolves are Coming to Eat Your Babies, and recently began morphing into the Leopards Eating Your Face Party. Meanwhile the Dogs have been friendly and gregarious and their community has been growing faster than the cats, to the point where it might start being impossible for the Cats to ever win again, and are starting to be serious about passing laws outlawing Face Eating. However the truth is that a few decades ago both of them were more accurately called the Wolves Eating Your Face party and the Leopards Eating Your Face party - but then the wolves changed and seriously dialled back on their Face Eating activities, and the leopards didn't. (Or at least not nearly as far or fast.) This is in fact is why the Wolves turned Dogs have been able to grow their community so fast.

This leads up to 2016, where the Independent Cats are frightened that the Gregarious Dogs are going to actually outlaw Face Eating, a sacred part of their culture, and know full well the only reason it hasn't happened yet is one of the highest ranking cats in the land has refused to do his job. The Dogs meanwhile are getting seriously angry with the Cats for continuing to advocate things they have come to see as unconscionable, and are worried that they are going to do something stupid and damaging. And then the Cats, riding a surge of fear over the decline of Face Eating culture, somehow get a bright orange marmalade tomcat elected. Now the Dogs don't just fear the Cats will do something stupid, they've just watched them doing it. And again multiple times since then. The Cats meanwhile have found they have a tiger by the tail, and are desperately holding on as this is the only way they can achieve their goals. Which appears to be a mix of burning down everything the Dogs have ever made, and stacking the Supreme Court to the point where they can make all forms of Face Eating legal again, forever.

That's kinda how we get into a position where the Dogs and Cats both think the other is about to do something terrible. And which side you agree with depends on what you think Face Eating actually represents, and whether outlawing or legalising it is the more evil option.

Trying to get back to something a little more fun...

Ghost in the Shell (2017) has a new trailer out to day...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4VmJcZR0Yg

So...

Front loading the trailer with "Please please please don't hate this film! We worked really hard on it! We don't want it to bomb!" is not exactly a good sign. Does anyone remember the last film that tried to front-load arguments against their critics? Didn't turn out well for Ghostbusters (2016) did it?

Recapping over some past topics:
Yes it sucks that an Asian actress isn't getting the role.
Yes it sucks that we're not getting a Black Widow movie out next year instead of or in addition to this film.
Putting all that aside, we have whole new problems.

In this film Kusanagi is the first of her kind, not mass produced. So wave good bye to all those issues from the original film. Not necessarily bad, as GITS worked well without it. But at the same time we also wave good bye to all the potential story options we have if full-body prosthetics are commonplace. That was a central theme of the whole GITS universe. Ripping that out (if that's what they've actually done) is actually a big deal. Compare and contrast the other incarnations of GITS with Robocop. One is about new-technology and lone (super) heroes. The other is about widespread technology and espionage. We have lots of films asking what happens when technology is new. (Robocop. Ironman. Etc) We have very few asking what happens when it's commonplace. I worry they're taking the setting somewhere it probably shouldn't go, and where it might not be commercially successful due to market saturation of that question.

Kusanagi seems to have no knowledge of her past, but it looks like the film is going to spend quite a bit of time filling that in. Oh please no. Not another origin story. Please not another one. And if she really is the only one of her kind with super human abilities... Please not another super hero origin story. Especially one that starts in the present day and then has lots of disjointed flashbacks. We've had enough of those thank you.

I'm also not getting the impression of an utterly confident and very experienced soldier that I remember from the film and TV series. Is supposed to be set earlier in her life, before she joined Section 9? Nothing particularly wrong with that, but this seems to change an important part of her character. Maybe this is needed, as her character is usually rather stoic, and that might not work well with actual people on the big screen. On the other hand, please don't want away or demish one of the all time great action women by turning her into a struggling start up.

Finally I'm not a fan of setting things in the present day or very near future. The original GITS had massive arcologies built (one would presume) with pennies per hour robotic labour. This film is in a normal looking city with holograms. That feels like a massive downgrade to me. The interior set design (what little we saw of it) struck me as cheap rather than futuristic or luxurious. It looks lazy. I just hope that when we get to the spider tank (There is going to be a spider tank, right? Right?) the SFX and general design isn't a rip off of ED-209 or Transformers.

Overall I'm afraid I just see a lot of evidence of Whitewashing. And no, I'm not talking about the main character. I'm talking about the systematic removal of anything that 'white people' (EG: white americans) might find confusing, disagreeable, upsetting, or frightening. Maybe the trailer is not representative, but a lot of hard scifi, trans-humanism, and politics seems to have gone out the window. The nipples I can understand. Americans are unbelievably stupid about those, and the film makers presumably want to make some money, but the rest? The honest impression I h'm getting is that they've ripped out the guts of the setting, kept a few iconic scenes(but without quite understanding why they were iconic to start with) and stuffed a conventional western super hero story in it's place. But maybe I'm wrong. Maybe they're just presenting it that way for publicity, because they think Super Hero films sell well, and the actual film will be something quite different.

I hope I'm wrong. I want this film to succeed. Partially because then we might get more adventurous sequels, and we also really need a really successful female action hero movie to make up for all the flops.
But I'm worried about this one.

This is a speech I wrote and read out yesterday at my mother's funeral.

Barbara Mary Routledge
17/10/1946 - 16/10/2016

My mother told me a lot of things when I was young. Some of them didn't stick with me, going in one ear and out the other, but one of them that did was this: "I used to feel sad, because I had no shoes. But then I meet a man who had no feet."

When I was younger I always thought that it was a rather silly saying. A trite admonishment to be happy with your lot in life, even if it’s very little, and not covert material wealth. Of course there are people worse off than I am. But there are people better off too. Everyone's somewhere on a sliding scale of poor to rich. It was only later on that I was able to understand how much lower on that scale my mother had been born, and how hard she had worked to make her way up it. And also something else.

I think my mother, though she never put it in so many words, must have thought the phrase was incomplete. I think my mother thought of it something like this: "I used to feel sad, because I had no shoes. But then I meet a man who had no feet. And I'm going to do something about that." And she did. She didn't just lament her situation. She worked to improve it. She didn't just lament the misfortune of others. She worked and campaigned to help them. If she saw something wrong, she tried to fix it. If she thought her actions were being harmful, she changed them, and tried to encourage others to do the same.

My mother worked for and gave money to charity. She sponsored children in developing countries to go to school, and learn to read and write. She also stepped in and got her hands dirty when she felt it was needed. She stood in cages to educate the public about factory farming. She ran stalls to show people how good vegetarian food could taste. And took in animals when they needed her help. She jumped on band wagons issues and good causes long before the public noticed or cared about them, and campaigned to ensure the public did notice. And she lived to see her efforts bear fruit. The fur industry is a shadow of its former self. Cosmetic testing has been banned through the EU. And while there are still poor and deprived areas, and indeed poor and deprived nations, the poor houses of England are long gone.

In fairness, I feel I should point out that I'm not aware of her campaigning on the issue of missing limbs... Though again in fairness that's a slightly harder problem than the others. But she did live long enough to see a man with artificial feet run faster than anyone ever has with natural ones. She also lived to see jet aircraft eclipse propeller aircraft, and give birth to Concorde and the Jumbo Jet. And to fly in the latter, if not the former. She saw men land upon the moon. She lived through the start of the computer age and the birth of the internet - and in her twilight years got her very own 'video phone'. She even got that house hold robot she always wanted - though the batteries remained something of a work in progress.

And at the end of the day, that's what life is: A work in progress. There is always more to be done, but if you can look back at what you have done, and see the difference in the world that you have made between your birth and now, then maybe you have lived a good life. I love my mother, and will always love her for as long as I can, but that is how I think I choose to remember her. As someone who lived a good life, and who made the world a better place.

My mother, Barbara Mary Routledge, passed away this morning at 6:10AM at my home, with my father, sister, and myself holding her. She was 18 hours short of her 70th birthday at the time.

She and my father were trying to buy a house near Brighton to spend their final years, after successfully selling their house in Florida, and the papers were due to be exchanged this Tuesday. My father still intends to go ahead, and the exchange of papers was due this Tuesday, but for various reasons it now looks like that will be delayed a few weeks, if it can go ahead at all.

My father arranged as much of his mother's funeral as he could, and he plans on doing same for his wife. At the moment the plan is for a cremation locally. Beyond that I don't know.

Hi all.

Don't know who I'll saying this to, but writing about it helps.

For those who haven't read my last journal, my mother has bone marrow condition and has just been diagnosed with a rare form of liver cancer, though there are indications that it's been there a while and her earlier liver problems were very much misdiagnosed. Because it's a rare form of cancer, she's gotten the attention of several experts on the subject. My family had been hoping that some medical rabbit could be pulled out of the hat, but unfortunately that was not the verdict we received.

Due to complications, my mother is ineligible for surgery, chemotherapy, or radiotherapy. There is also a new complication with her digestive system, which is inhibiting her from eating as much as she needs, and the doctors don't think they can fix that. And if they can't, she may not survive long enough for the cancer to get her.

My mum will fight, and I will do my best to support her, and my father (before and afterwards) but I don't know how much longer she can keep going.

My mother just got diagnosed with Liver cancer - specifically angiosarcoma, in addition to the mielofibrosis she already had. Unfortunately it's probably been there a while, since the one partially available case study reads like a shopping list of all her symptoms the past six months.

TL;DR - It's a really rare form of cancer which no one knows how to treat or diagnose properly. It is very unlikely she'll make it to two years.

In about two weeks she'll have her 70th birthday. I won't be putting aside any presents for christmas.

Well I'll be off to Germany at stupid o'clock tomorrow morning.

Let's hope it's a good one this year!

Happy Great Cleansing Of The British Empire Day everyone!

While I can understand the feelings of many Europeans on the subject of Brexit (largely because I share them) I would remind everyone that cutting your nose off to spite your face is a foolish thing to do. It was a foolish thing to do when 52% of my nation voted to leave the EU, and it will be a foolish thing to do if the EU tries to destroy the UK economy as punishment.

The European Union exists because the continent is stronger together. Even after losing the vote that is still the case. While the EU could survive trashing Britain, it might be a level of survival they would not enjoy, because damage to one of the largest economies in the world (and the UK is still that) would hit them as well, and hard. The EU bent over backwards for Greece and continues to bend over backwards for Turkey. However unpleasant the reality, the same will probably apply here.

The most likely scenario (or at least best case scenario) is that a year from now, British businesses will still be bound by EU law, British borders will still be open to EU migration, and the UK will still be paying £200M/week to the EU to gain access to its markets, as a member of the EEA. (And having lost our ability to veto policy.) And the 52-percenters will be crying foul over their pension and welfare cuts, to a complete lack of sympathy from London. And other populist parties in other nations will be making noises along the lines of "US TOO!"

Could this lead to the break of the EU? Maybe. But the EU was built on the EEA. To borrow a quote: "We built it once. We can rebuild it again." And the sad fact is the EU needs some rebuilding. Or re-branding. Or something. The UK referendum was not the first 'fuck-you' vote against europe, and it probably won't be the last. Unfortunately myself and the other Remainians of Britain can no longer help you, and thankfully our 52-percenter neighbours can no longer hinder you. What you do now, and the future you make, is in your hands.

And perhaps, in time, when the passing of time has healed wounds, and killed off enough of the 52-percenters, Britain can rejoin a stronger European Union. I hope to live to see that day, and ask that you work together to build something worth coming back to.

And also that you learn from our mistakes, and try to avoid repeating them yourself.

What can I say about this...

Sorry to the rest of Europe. And also sorry to the rest of the planet. The economic ripples of this are going to affect everyone, though the UK most of all.

I honestly didn't think there were that many 'Bush voters' in the UK. Though I also recently learned that only about ~40% of people in Britain had a 'post high school' education, and since that was a good indicator of whether they'd vote stay... yeah.

To everyone who wasn't monumentally retarded yesterday; thank you for turning up.



My only slim hope now is all three major UK parties running on a campaign to cancel Brexit. It's not quite a two-party system over here but the chances of them collectively losing an election is non existent.

I say slim because the only reason we had this stupid vote in the first place was because that miserable bastard Cameon wanted to deal with bickering in his own party, and he shafted the rest of the country over in the process. If he (or more likely a successor) once again chooses success of party over the welfare of the nation then we're fucked.

Again.

CT17 wrote:
Out of curiosity (I was watching "Yes Minister" and "Yes PM" a while back), how do you think Sir Humphrey and Jim Hacker would handle this situation?



Oh you hussy temptress...

"Well what do you think?"
"What do I think of what Prime Minister?"
"Should Britain leave the EU?"
"Oh I am but a humble civil servant Prime Minister. It wouldn't do for me to have opinions on such things."
"Just a humble civil servant? Wouldn't do to have opinions?"
"Is something wrong Prime Minister?"
"That's the biggest load of poppycock I've heard in... In my tenure as Prime Minister!"
"Are you saying I'm lying?"
"Yes I most certainly am!"
"Well.... It did seem appropriate. After all everyone lies about this issue."
"No they don't."
"Oh of course they do Prime Minister."
"I don't!"
"Really? Do you think we should leave the EU?"
"Well it's a complicated issue and... No wait, hang on! I asked you first!"
"Ah but that's my point Prime Minister: You didn't."
"I most certainly did!"
"Oh no Prime Minister I couldn't possibly disagree more. You see you asked, 'Do you think we should leave the EU'. You did not ask, 'Do you think we should leave or stay in the EU'."
"What's the difference? It's the same question!"
"Actually no Prime Minister. You see the way you asked it focused upon a given outcome, ignoring the other alternative, and forcing people to instantly rationalise their pre existing conclusions rather than inviting people give the various aspects of the issue proper consideration and come to an informed conclusion."
"I did what?"
"You biased the question Prime Minster."
"Well I didn't intend to. And in any case that's hardly lying."
"Of course not Prime Minister. The lie was that you wanted my opinion."
"But I did want your opinion!"
"Really Prime Minister? I'm flattered of course, but did you really want my opinion? Or did you want someone to agree with your existing perspective on the subject? You did chose to focus on leaving, on the uncertainty of change, on the road less travelled. It's almost as if... Why Prime Minister, do you want to stay in Europe?"
"Well... Yes. Yes I I suppose I do. But what about all the positive sides of leaving? Greater political and judicial freedom, and savings on Benefits for all those migrants."
"Very good Prime Minister! Lying again! We'll make a politician out of you yet!"
"I was not lying!"
"Prime Minister, please. If the EU actually had a political power over us then this referendum wouldn't be going ahead, as they've made it abundantly clear that they want us to stay."
"Well we have political power over Scotland and we allowed them a vote for Independence."
"Exactly Prime Minister. We allowed them to vote. The EU is not allowing us to vote, it's sitting by while we go ahead, without asking for or needing their permission."
"What about Judicial freedom?"
"Another lie Prime Minister. While it is true that he ECHR is one restraint on the ability of our judges to send criminals to nations that torture people, it is by far not the only one. It is not even the most important one, as the judges simply don't want to. As absurd as some might find the notion is, many judges are actually decent human beings who take their job seriously and perform it to the best of their ability, and would be appalled at the idea of sending someone off to such a nation."
"Well that makes sense I suppose. And Welfare?"
"Well that's not actually my department Prime Minister, but based on what my colleges say, and I regret this is only heresy Prime Minister...?"
"Go on! Go on!"
"Based on what my colleges say, the numbers just aren't there. The back benchers who say that your proposals won't make deep cuts are technically correct because there simply isn't anything there to cut. However what they are concerned about is half a million UK nationals suddenly out of work because they're no longer allowed to work in the EU if we leave. So many overseas workers coming back all at once also threatens to inflate the London housing bubble, with worrying implications for us all Prime Minister."
"Yes, those are all excellent points Humphrey. You've given me a lot to think about, especially about the housing bubble. I do agree we have to do something about that."
"Of course Prime Minister. I'm happy to be of service. Speaking of which, I believe you have a meeting with the representatives from the MoD in the next five minutes?"
"The Trident Replacement discussions yes, that... Oh heavens! Is that the time! Sorry to dash, but if I don't leave now I'll be late!"
"Not at all Prime Minster. I hope you have a productive meeting."

Bernard opened the door for the PM and walked over to Sir Humphrey once the two of them were alone. Sir Humphrey ignored him, and continued with his important work of the morning cross word puzzle.

"He's getting better at that."
"I know. He almost got me to answer his question. A competent man in Downing Street? What is the world coming to?"
"Truly so. Plus I can only imagine how embarrassing it woudl have been if you had to admit a strong personal conviction for staying in the EU."
"Now really Bernard, I don't know where you get these ideas from. We've been over this many times. I am a civil servant in Her Majesty's Government. Minister and Prime Ministers come and go, but the Service endures. It is not our place to have opinions. It is especially not our place to have opinions that might interfere with our jobs and the smooth running of the civil service when the next government is elected. Therefore when I told the Prime Minister that I had no opinions on Britain leaving or staying in the EU I was being perfectly honest."
"So the prospect of all those civil servants coming home from Brussels, many exiled for incom..."
"Promoted."
"Of course. My apologies. Promoted for excellence into positions more suited for their personal skills. The prospect of all of them coming back, and regaining their old positions, and competing for many others, including your own, is not something you have an opinion on?"

Sir Humphrey stopped, put the pen down, and turned around to stare at Bernard. He kept up the stare for a moment before slowly smiling.

"Why Bernard. I do believe we might make a competent bureaucrat out of you yet."

Bist du wollen macht ein panzer?

Heil! Heil! Heil! Heil! Heil! Heil!
Do you want to build a panzer?
Let's go invade Poland
The western powers won't stop us
With no will to fight
They won't cause us any fuss!

We have this deal with Russia
But fuck them guys
They can be our targets next!
Do you want to build a panzer?
It deosn't have to be a panzer...

Go away Germany!
Never mind.


Heil! Heil! Heil! Heil! Heil! Heil!
Do you want to build a jet plane...


# # #

NB: For anyone wondering, the blame for this lies squarely at the feet of a short Austrian ne'er-do-well.
Again. ;P

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmWQE58uSgA
Animation reviews of 2015 set to music

This is a joy to watch and listen to, even if the same could not be said for many of the films in the list. ^.^

A few hours before I wrote this journal entry I asked a question about a piece of art I recently received as a commission. At the time the question was intended to be innocent (I was uncertain of my judgement and was asking for a second opinion) and I honestly did not see the negative implications until KV1NN4 and Nereza pointed them out. At first I maintained the question was harmless, but as I looked at it again... Yeah. They had a very good point. I will not repeat the question here, and I've taken the submission down to avoid further offence. But I will repost the last thing I said to both of them just before deciding to taking it down completely:
Ignore everything I said above. You're completely right. I should never have asked those questions at all, in any way. It wasn't my intention to be an arsehole, but that doesn't change that in hindsight, I was.
My sincere apologies to everyone who was offended by the question and the way in which it was asked. The artist in question ( who it turns out was extremely offended) has asked for no further communication. I will honour that request.

I don't update my journal very often, so this one will probably stay up for a time. While I may have taken the submission down, I do not want to fully erase the mistake I made, as this is a brief period of history I very much do not want to repeat.


.

Ba! Humbug!