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To the basics!
Posted 12 years agoWell, Turns out I need to start with the basics before I get into anything serious. =P Well my journey starts now.
To the basics!
Posted 12 years agoWell, Turns out I need to start with the basics before I get into anything serious. =P Well my journey starts now.
To the basics!
Posted 12 years agoWell, Turns out I need to start with the basics before I get into anything serious. =P Well my journey starts now.
In the Mind of Madness #1
Posted 12 years ago I'm not a negative person but I do find myself in slumps quite often. I don't like being unhappy, but I am. I feel exceedingly empty. This feeling has been growing more and more lately. I can never put my finger on why I feel this way tho. I sit on the computer all day researching things. Gathering information about anything. It's like I am trying to fill the void with knowledge. It's not working.
I have no real interests. I have nothing to motivate me. Nothing inspires me. I don't really have hobbies or anything that I really enjoy doing. I sit here thinking, always at night when i'm alone in my room, what do I want for myself? Why am I so contempt with everything that is happening to me? I've come to the point where being happy with everything is the greatest source of my stress and pain and, unhappiness. It's a paradox that shouldn't exist. Yet it does because i'm sitting in the middle of it.
I guess It's because I just want to find a place to belong. I don't really have many friends. The friends I do have are all spread out now. I want to be part of something, almost anything. I'm here on this site, as I have been on many other sites. Trying to be a part of some kind of group, friends, buddies of any kind. Just some people to talk to whenever I can.
I don't know why I feel so distant. This is the first time I have really written this out. First time I have put these thoughts to solid words, and of course I post them online for the wold to see. I'm not even sure why I'm writing this. I was going to say that it isn't a plea, but the more I re-read this. The more it seems that way. I do not want pity or anything like that. I just want to find a place I can go, a thing I can do, A game I can play, anything to escape. An outlet of my emotions that I seem to keep deep inside.
I only seem to feel the weight of this outward pressure of my held in emotions when i'm tired. I can feel the longing, distance, and sadness. Maybe it's my wish to be noticeably good at something. I don't feel I have any talents. I just exists here. Looking at the world from the outside. No, i'm inside the world with everyone else, but i feel i'm just on a different frequency. I can see everyone, hear them, feel them, but can't connect anyone for the life of me.
In the end maybe I just need some sleep. Sleep always seems to be able to rebuild the facade back to it default form. IF you have made it to this point I thank you with everything I am. Don't let me bring you down. Stay Strong, go fourth and find who you are. Find a candle to light your darkness. I have yet to find mine.
I have no real interests. I have nothing to motivate me. Nothing inspires me. I don't really have hobbies or anything that I really enjoy doing. I sit here thinking, always at night when i'm alone in my room, what do I want for myself? Why am I so contempt with everything that is happening to me? I've come to the point where being happy with everything is the greatest source of my stress and pain and, unhappiness. It's a paradox that shouldn't exist. Yet it does because i'm sitting in the middle of it.
I guess It's because I just want to find a place to belong. I don't really have many friends. The friends I do have are all spread out now. I want to be part of something, almost anything. I'm here on this site, as I have been on many other sites. Trying to be a part of some kind of group, friends, buddies of any kind. Just some people to talk to whenever I can.
I don't know why I feel so distant. This is the first time I have really written this out. First time I have put these thoughts to solid words, and of course I post them online for the wold to see. I'm not even sure why I'm writing this. I was going to say that it isn't a plea, but the more I re-read this. The more it seems that way. I do not want pity or anything like that. I just want to find a place I can go, a thing I can do, A game I can play, anything to escape. An outlet of my emotions that I seem to keep deep inside.
I only seem to feel the weight of this outward pressure of my held in emotions when i'm tired. I can feel the longing, distance, and sadness. Maybe it's my wish to be noticeably good at something. I don't feel I have any talents. I just exists here. Looking at the world from the outside. No, i'm inside the world with everyone else, but i feel i'm just on a different frequency. I can see everyone, hear them, feel them, but can't connect anyone for the life of me.
In the end maybe I just need some sleep. Sleep always seems to be able to rebuild the facade back to it default form. IF you have made it to this point I thank you with everything I am. Don't let me bring you down. Stay Strong, go fourth and find who you are. Find a candle to light your darkness. I have yet to find mine.
My First Journal Entry
Posted 12 years agoSup guys(Well the small amout of people reading this right now)
I decided to actually start using this site. I've had the tab open for like a week now.
I've been working on some sketches for my "fursona" Still don't know how he(I) will turn out but, in time it will all come together.
Will post scans of those who want to see it all slowly come together.
Well that's all for today. See ya =P
