⚠ Woah! Long journal! ⚠
It's a really heartfelt one. Get ready :)

I've wanted to write this for a while, but I didn't quite realise until now.

It's 12:50am on Tuesday morning as I write my stream of thought.

I've just posted one of my very favourite commissions ever (https://www.furaffinity.net/view/54507197/), and it resonates incredibly strongly with me. This dragon self I feel I am is depicted so beautifully in every aspect. I wrote about my otherkin feelings in the description of that submission, however I wanted to expound on it.

Lately, I've been discussing my otherkin feelings with (other otherkin) friends too. Everyone has their own, personal story, and I've been wanting to explore mine too. Asking myself questions like: Why do I feel so drawn to dragons? Why do certain dragon features resonate so strongly with me? Why don't I explore this (core) dragon part of myself more fully? There's no reason not to. Only fear of judgement from others, because expressing my love for dragons earned mockery from my peers in school. And otherkin are weird Tumblr people. Fear that I'll be cringe. Fear of being myself and fear of revealing something that others will find cringeworthy and reject me for.

Since I first encountered dragons when my mum read the King Arthur stories to me at a very young age (~5), I loved them. Spyro the Dragon came out around that time, and I wished that Spyro would glide down into my backyard and I could meet him. In my dreams, I would be a dragon, gliding down the front steps of the house. The thought of opening my wings and watching the ground fall away from me as I lifted into the air was euphoric.

I've always loved flying, but it had to be on my own steam, not relying on a machine. That concept always resonated with me, but what also resonated with me were four-legged winged creatures. At that very young age, I saw Disney's Hercules and the winged horse Pegasus. Being able to walk on four legs AND fly with wings? YES! I loved that concept so much. I wanted to be a four-legged, winged creature too. I loved the villain's gryphon form in DuckTales: Treasure of the Lost Lamp: That really sparked something! For a while, I wasn't sure which type of four-legged, winged creature I wanted to be, but "dragon" was the eventual clear winner: No more confusion!

So it was particularly feral, particularly Western dragons, that I loved, and one of which I wanted to be. Being able to walk on all fours but also fly with wings on my back: That's what I am so drawn to.

I'd love imagining being this kind of creature in games with friends as a child. The idea of being a dragon is so innate, so natural to me, that I was always confused as to why dragons didn't have the same appeal to everyone else around me. To me, making stories, movies and games about dragons was like a no-brainer. DUH! So... Why weren't people making them? Iunno. Weren't dragons such an obvious choice?

...???????

My parents bought me the book Dragon Rider by Cornelia Funke for Christmas in 2004. I read all ~500 pages that same day and adored the fantasy characters and world. Firedrake, the main dragon protagonist, was a sweet, kind-hearted dragon, and very endearing. I also have to mention that for me, dragons had to be "good", they had to be kind and caring. This is the opposite to stereotypical depictions of Western dragons, however dragons being depicted as bad and evil was something I found offensive. This, along with "Dragonslayers", made (and make) me upset.

Returning to Dragon Rider: I was so taken with the dragons in that story, I decided I wanted to be a silver dragon like that too. I copied Dragon Rider illustrations and got really into drawing, the same dragon appearing in all my exercise books for the next year. Being alone with my incredibly strong dragon inclinations, I felt very isolated. I had absolutely no awareness of anyone else in the entire world feeling like I did. Wanting desperately to be a dragon. Not wanting to be around dumb humans. Not that I was a dumb human: I was a dragon. Duh.

Through longingly searching for dragon pictures on the "early" internet in 2005 at the age of 13, I found a furry artist's site and loved all the dragon pictures. There were various anthro ones I liked, and I tried drawing a similar depiction intended as my dragon self, but I didn't pursue this any further. For the first time, I discovered there was a term to describe how I felt: "Otherkin"! How exciting to know there were others like me! I even found a website for dragonkin! Maybe it was draconity.org or another one? I don't remember. There was a form to fill into apply for an account. But after I submitted the form, I got such a weird vibe, I got really scared and anxious, and I ran away, forgot the password for that email account, and never joined. Honestly, I think it was for the best because I was a confused 13 year old on the wild west of the internet. :/

Following this, I kind of ran away from otherkin feelings. I'd become misanthropic, I hated humans, I only wanted to be a dragon amongst dragons. I scared myself because this all felt unhealthy, and I didn't want to continue down that path of hatred any more. Only a few years later did I start feeling okay about exploring dragons again, and this time I felt better-adjusted.

I created Ashtalon as a character for Istaria: Chronicles of the Gifted in 2008. I was delighted to finally find an MMO where you could play as a dragon!!! (When's the next serious dragon MMO coming out? :( )
Originally, I'd wanted to be a silver dragon, just like in that beloved story. However it didn't look that great in the lighting of the character creator and I tried other colour combinations instead. Red and yellow looked great, so I went with that! I chose very minimal adornments, as was always my bent. I've always loved a simple design.

So I played as this red and yellow dragon, Ashtalon, and discovered roleplaying. I'd wanted to play on the non-roleplaying server when I joined, but that one was called Chaos, and I wanted to play on "Order" because I like what that word implies. At some point, I stopped interacting with the actual "game" features of the game, and spent all my time just being a dragon. I loved being Ashtalon and discovered a playful side of myself that felt very natural but I'd never known was there. I played this character as myself, projecting all my emotions for how I'd be as a dragon onto him. Roleplaying moved from the game to MSN Messenger, where I continued to be Ashtalon. I still have incredibly close friends from then, whom I absolutely adore.

So I integrated and became "Ashtalon", now not just some avatar from a game, but my chosen form. He's who I am on a deep level: He's my dragon self. He's me.

In university, I discovered Reddit Atheism™ and proceeded to discard all my supernatural beliefs, all open-mindedness to the supernatural, with prejudice and condescension. I became completely materialist. I listened heavily to commentary about the culture war and was quite bitter and resentful. Being a dragon? An otherkin? Please. That stuff was all bullshit. I was still on FA and found like minds in the furry fandom, however I got this... Longing feeling? At seeing the genuine expression of otherkin. I felt like I was outside the club, looking sadly through the window with the people who were just like me, I just didn't believe in that stuff any more. But I still wanted to be a dragon too? I wished I could believe in all that again, because it was a wonderful fantasy.

I have to admit that I learned a huge amount from being atheist and materialist. It's helped me a lot to have a broader perspective and I think it was time really well-spent.

Only a couple of years ago, I began opening again to the possibility of things beyond the obvious, material existence. I began to identify as otherkin again, on the basis of "well, if I could choose what I was, of course I'd be a dragon". I was fine with it being only possible in wistful fantasy, since I already believed it was only fantasy for everyone else too. So why lock myself out of something that I found joy in? :)

I also started to get tired of all the drama of the news cycle, internet commentators discussing the news cycle, and being constantly, willingly immersed in the hostility of that mindset for a prolonged period. My beloved partner, shertu, found my passion for political or news topics endearing, however he did eventually tell me my constant complaining was wearing on him. This was important for me to start reevaluating what kind of emotions I was putting out into the world.

Over a year following our separation, my birdie  shertu lost a job he thought was going well, and on what I believe was frustrated impulse, took his own life the same day. Everyone who knew him was blindsided. He was pretty much the last person any of us would have expected to do this.

I was now desperate to know if consciousness survived death. I didn't want to believe that it all ended with nothing to follow—not any more. It couldn't be. I wanted to hold my birdie again, tell him how stupid he was but that I still loved him and missed him. And since my wounds have now healed due to time: How I forgive him now for all the things I was upset about, and how I've let those go.

So it was that I began listening to hundreds of accounts of near death experiences to answer that question of "does consciousness survive?". From there, I've begun to delve into spirituality, mindfulness, and meditation with an open mind. The verdict on consciousness surviving? It seems so. I'd like to give my birdie another hug, at any rate.

I can barely believe how much I've changed in this time. I feel as though I've "evolved". I'm of course the same person, but with a broader perspective. I've disengaged from the noisy political fighting. I've disengaged from holding onto grudges, and I've disengaged from seeing people as wrong or stupid for holding beliefs or philosophies that I don't. I'm working on being less quick to judge, and I'd like to work on reacting more calmly in the face of frustration.

I now try to send out positivity into the world, rather than ruminating on all the things I find wrong with it. I wanna be that kind, playful, good-natured dragon. I wanna bring people joy. I wanna joke and laugh and not take things too seriously. I want my friends to know how much they mean to me, how much I appreciate them, and I want to make the world a little bit brighter. I'm (re)discovering myself. Not that I didn't have the inclination to be like this before, but it's like it was buried and I didn't realise it was there the whole time. My focus was on the negative so much.

I want to be myself. And if that self is an otherkin red and yellow dragon called Ashtalon, I want to be that. Those words honestly give me a thrill to write out! I want to be less afraid of expressing who I am, because following my natural tendency to express as a dragon makes me so very happy. Aligning my actions to who I want to be is making life feel brighter.

In some of the spiritual podcasts I've listened to, the speakers have mentioned how incredible your experience can be if you be your genuine self and follow your passion. I've already allowed my inner self to be expressed as Ashtalon, and the thought of being more of that is thrilling. I love exploring that aspect in VRChat but also in art. And I am working, bit by bit, on developing the skills to draw pictures that express my dragon self too. (It'll probably be a while until I feel confident enough in my skills to share, but that's something I REALLY want to do!)

Again, I'm surprised at how different I am to just a few years ago. I think this is the best version of myself so far, and I want to keep going.

I'm now genuinely delighted to identify myself as otherkin. I'm a dragon, and I don't have to be "weird" about it. My human existence is pretty good, actually! I have wonderful friends: Dragons, furs, and non-furs, wonderful family, and for some reason, everyone seems to be kind to me. I now love focusing on things that make me happy: Good art, dragon art, learning art, being a dragon, cute stuff, animals doing endearing things, friends, friends' successes, and giving my friends moral support to achieve their dreams. I've experienced being bitter and negative, and learned that there's something else I'd prefer to be instead.

I love talking about otherkin stuff with my fellow dragons. We're all unique and have our own approaches and understandings. However I love being able to talk to other dragons because we can relate so easily. We don't have to explain it all from zero: There's mutual understanding and a shared experience.

I hope to talk a whole lot more with other dragons about this too! I know otherkin come in infinite varieties, but I am very much focused on and interested in the dragons. They're just so special to me, and it's innate. I don't know why exactly I have this inclination, but I love exploring it and discovering who I am.

If you made it this far, thank you for reading! Maybe you're an otherkin too, maybe you're a dragon too. Perhaps you found something relatable here! I'm very shy and reserved about talking to new people directly, so if you send me a personal message and I never respond, that's my default state. But feel free to comment if you like!

That about does it for this journal! I really needed to write this out so I could bring all these implicit, subconscious thoughts right out and articulate them consciously. This was mostly for me, but I felt the desire to share this. It makes me really happy to be genuine about who I am and why it all matters to me. I just wanna be a dragon so muchhhhhghghghslkjflflkjelhjglksjelfksjlekjflksjefsehfhghhh ✨

So now I put "Otherkin" in my profiles and descriptions. I like to keep those as short as possible because who wants to read a whole story (ironic for me to say this now, I know)? But I find myself strongly wanting to list it there because it's core to my being. I'm a dragon! Truly and deeply.

That's why I am otherkin.

This weekend,  PistolPup and I will be performing a back-to-back DJ set at FurDU/Floof Doof Tails of Terror. We'll have some spooky tunes for you! 👻
We'll be performing at 6pm AEST (UTC + 10) on Saturday the 15th of October. That's 8:00am UTC, and 1:00am PDT.

The event will be running not only IRL at Surfers Paradise on the Gold Coast, QLD, but also in VRChat! Please check FloofDoofAU on Twitter for more information:
https://twitter.com/FloofDoofAU/sta.....03941618302977

Also, please feel to join the Discord for world information, etc!
https://discord.com/invite/RJMt7rjaq3

See you there. :)

 shertu took his own life two days ago.

He was my beloved partner from 2019 and we loved each other, even after we separated in April 2021.

“Devastated” doesn’t really cover how I feel. It’s been anguish, grief, numbness, incredulity, frustration, anger, and rage.

I didn't truly believe it until his brother confirmed it to me personally on the phone. He was utterly devastated himself, as this came out of nowhere.

None of his friends or family, none of the people who loved and cared about him, had any clue or warning as to what he was going to do. He wrote nothing apart from the date of his suicide on his FA, Twitter, and Discord profiles.

He had a loving family who gave him as much support as they could. He lived with his parents, who always looked out for him and loved him very, very dearly. His friends cared about him, and he’d just spent time out with them a day or two before, and had been making plans to watch movies with others. He’d said “see you tomorrow” to his Final Fantasy XIV raid group just the previous day.

From what everyone could see, everything was going well for him and he seemed happy.

It's not my place to go into too many details, but he'd suffered a setback earlier that day, a very frustrating one for anyone, but certainly not worth ending one's life over.

I'm incredibly upset that he didn't even talk to me. I would have 100% been there to listen to and support him, I was available and he ought to have known I wished the best for him. I'd said so in our last conversation.

There were so many friends who cared about him, who would have definitely been there for him too. All he'd needed to do was just say something. ANYTHING. But he was one to suppress his emotions, even to himself. He kept everything hidden; no one had any information whatsoever that he wasn't okay.

In the end, it seems there was nothing anyone could have done. He made this decision on his own, despite the incredible amount of everlasting damage it's done to his friends and family.

shertu was a genuinely likeable person, good company, and he and I had good rapport and shared so much. I could be completely emotionally vulnerable with him, and sometimes he was even brave enough to do the same.

If only he had talked to me.

So shertu's family and friends are suddenly left without someone they loved and cared about, and it was completely unnecessary. It's surreal. This is outside anything I ever could have imagined him doing, and it's so unfair. To everyone.

His brother said "he had so much going for him." I honestly can't rationalise what shertu did.

So if you're ever thinking of ending yourself, don't you fucking dare. You'll cause far more suffering then you could ever imagine. SAY SOMETHING.

If anyone would like to message me on Telegram, you know how. I appreciate every single friend who's reached out to me so far. To be honest, I really goddamn need my friends right now.

Likewise, if I can offer support regarding this to any friends, please don't hesitate to ask.

To shertu: I miss you. Why. I thought you didn't like making me cry.

I am planning to go to one of the huge conventions happening in early June in Nevada, USA. I'm wondering if any friends would like to catch up while I'm there? Please let me know in advance so we can arrange something! It would great to meet see friends that I haven't had a chance to meet in person just yet.

[No spoilers]
I really enjoyed the new game just released by  Rimentus! I'd had no idea he had been working on a game until just before he launched it, but I was really excited to hear about it! He said he'd worked on it mostly solo for about three years. That's a feat! So I picked it up as soon as it came out and I've played it when I had a spare moment and just finished it after about eight and a half hours of total play time.

It's absolutely awesome to play a game by an artist I've followed for such a long time. I really like Rimentus's artwork, and I really enjoyed The Mystery of Caketropolis! Usually a solo game dev project doesn't play for that long. Admittedly, I have played most big AAA titles for much less than I played this. I think it's the playing as a dragon that really does it for me, really. (Please, when can we get a proper big studio dragon game? Spyro is great, but I'd love more...)

It's very apparent that this game was a labour of love by Rimentus. He created a neat setting for it, and I liked the characters and story. It was a really good mystery story as well, and made me go "ohhhhhh" as various things were revealed! I won't go into detail so anyone reading this can enjoy having the story unfold for themselves if they play it. Which I recommend!

I found I cared about the characters and I liked the worldbuilding. Of course, there's only so much story you can tell in a game like this (without having a big team), but the characters felt like they were worth getting to know.

Since this was an RPG Maker creation, I was reminded of my one-time attempt to make my own RPG Maker game, right after I'd played Undertale. I spent a long time to get not very far, so I know it must have taken a monumental amount of time and effort to make this game. Clearly, Rimentus put a lot of dedication into this. Congrats to him for getting so far as to publish it, that's really something!

A dragon artist and indie dev absolutely deserve support. And if you're on this site, The Mystery of Caketropolis is definitely for you! Why don't you go and pick it up! :3
https://store.steampowered.com/app/....._Caketropolis/

Thanks again to Rimentus for a game I really enjoyed! ^.=.^

Dragon Rider by Cornelia Funke was an extremely formative book for me, which I was given at Christmas when I was almost a teen.

Soon after beginning, I was enthralled, and I read it cover to cover by the end of the day. I loved it. The following year at school, I copied Dragon Rider illustrations into all my exercise books at school, page after page after page.

My love of dragons, which had existed from an early age, went into absolute overdrive. I ventured very much further into my otherkin dragon side. I imagined myself as a silver dragon like the ones in the book, however I became a red/yellow dragon because silver didn't look very good in the character creator for the game Istaria, where Ashtalon first came into existence.

The dragons' names in Dragon Rider are things like: Slatebeard, Firedrake, Shimmertail, Spinecrackle, etc. So you can see the influence of those names on me: Ashtalon Skyfire. Anyway, it's easy to say that Dragon Rider had an enormous influence on me, and it's kept in a treasured place on my bookshelf.

Only a few days ago, I learned that at long last, a movie adaptation of Dragon Rider had been made! I was extremely excited to go and see it, and I was lucky enough to see it with my birdie. I only arrived home a short while ago after seeing him off at the airport, as today was the end of his one-week holiday with me. We had a wonderful time together and I'm glad he's come to appreciate dragons, although I know gryphons will always be his favourite, as dragons are for me. ;3

We first learned of the movie from a poster while seeing Wonder Woman 1984, but I didn't tweak until I recognised the Sorrell the Brownie (a small, anthro, catlike character) on the poster. I was excited and made plans with my birdie to see it as soon as we could.

Onto my review of the movie itself! It's hard to think of a place to begin because I have so much to say, but I'll start with Firedrake. He was the main dragon character and his design was really on point! He was very cute, just the right size, and the right personality! Very endearing and beautiful details all around. I always loved a soft, lined kind of underside on a dragon, so I loved that spect of his design. Now that I think more carefully, his design was pretty much perfect, and very faithful to his illustrations in the book. He was also animated in such an adorable way. I wasn't quite sure if I liked Firedrake's voice at first, but it really grew on me as the movie went on. I give Constantin Film an A+ for Firedrake!

Sorrel's design was just right for this film: A bit cuter than I expected, and more endearing. In the book, she is far more grumpy, sceptical and cynical, but I like what they did with her in the movie and I really liked her character.

Ben, the main human character, was quite different to how I'd imagined him as I read the book—less wide-eyed, older, and less likeable. It seems like they tried to give him a bit of a "redemption" character arc but it didn't quite work as well as it could have. He was actually quite different to how he was in the book, and I wish he'd been a little kinder and more naïve.

Professor Greenbloom: Oi mate! He had an *Australian* voice! Crikey! As an Australian, I can hardly tell you how meaningful it is to have a local-sounding voice appear in a movie, because us Australians might as well be non-existent in basically every piece of media we watch. (I would personally love to hear more Australian voices in movies...........) So when I heard Greenbloom's voice, my eyes lit up and I clutched my birdie and we both delighted at hearing it. Thank you, Constantin Film!

Nettlebrand. He was a very imposing villain in the book! Perhaps he could have been more so in this movie, but he was great with Patrick Stewart's voice acting. I had imagined his design to be a bit more dragony, and also more imposing, but overall, I think they did a good job with him.

As for details of the plot, I could understand that they needed to cut a lot of material from the book. There were many characters and scenes cut, including some that I really liked, however the end result was good. I found it amusing to see how much influence they took from How to Train Your Dragon. The character designs of the dragons (apart from Firedrake) were very obviously inspired by Dreamworks, and there was an obvious reference to HTTYD in one scene. On the topic of references, there was a cheeky little one in the second half of the movie that made me laugh out loud. It came up so unexpectedly but it was placed just perfectly and really made me giggle!

My birdie and I remarked at how some of the animations were a bit janky. There was one scene where the main character ran in a strange way, almost as though he was floating. Sometimes when Firedrake took flight, he had no momentum before flying, and sometimes his wing flaps had a lot of time between them, given the way he was flying. However these are only small details and the rest of the animation was fine.

Seeing a movie adaptation of your favourite book will always lead to some disappointments regarding changes, however I think Dragon Rider was quite solid. I can hardly express how overjoyed I was to find out this relatively obscure book had been adapted to film. Before watching it, I was relieved to learn it was from a German company, as the norm for animated films seems for them to be quite silly and stupid. I would have been disappointed if they'd made this beloved story of mine like that, so I was relieved it was approached with care and love.

After the movie, my birdie said to me that my dragon name was like the ones from Dragon Rider. I said: YES! That was where the influence for my name came from. Just four dragony words-sounding put together. ^.=.^

Overall, I can say that it was a wonderful experience to see this film. I can forgive it for all the details I would have rather had changed because I'm very happy that they made it in the first place, and that it was arguably pretty faithful to my favourite book.

I give Dragon Rider a solid 8.5/10. I will definitely be buying a hard copy of the movie once it's available! It means so much to a dragon like me to see this treasured story brought to life.

Because of the adult nature of this site, I refuse to use it without a VPN, as law mandates my ISP logs the domain names I visit. I feel awkard about having Fur Affinity logged against my name. I do not stay logged in on FA on desktop, and my browser discards my history once I close it.

On my phone, often the page will load nothing at all when I go to furaffinity.net. It's a blank, white page. I'll try another VPN server and hope it works.

Once I can load the page, I'll have to go past the "Please complete the security check to access www.furaffinity.net"; page. I'm then supposed to do two pages of captcha to even get to Fur Affinity's login page, but often I get the error message "Please stand by, while we are checking your browser..." with a red box below that says "This is taking longer than expected, please reload the page", whereupon I reload the first security check page and get the same error message. I'll change VPN server at this point and if I'm lucky I'll get through.

Once I CAN load the captcha, too bad if I get one of the two captcha pages wrong because I couldn't see the images very well at a tiny resolution on my phone.

That's before even getting to FA's login screen. Once I do, however, I have to complete ANOTHER captcha after inputting my username and password. I'd better not misspell my login details because they'll be erased if I get them wrong, AND I'll have to do yet another captcha, selecting cars or fire hydrants or whatever, and I'd better not get that wrong because it might throw me into an endless loop of captchas because it thinks I'm a bot.

I used to use the alternative captcha method to log in faster, where you just had to enter a few characters, but that method was removed a couple of months ago.

On both my phone and my desktop, I'm also running into an issue where no images will load while I'm on my current VPN server. No thumbnails, no gallery, nothing. Changing VPN servers usually fixes this, but sometimes I have to do the first security check again. Ugh.

This all culminates in FA being a real pain in my dragon rump to log into and use. The site is becoming really inconvenient for me to access because of all the hoops I have to jump through in order to even log in.

I value my privacy online, so VPNs are a mainstay for me, but FA is certainly not making things easy. I find myself using the site less and less because of this. Sure, there's other sites, but FA is kind of where I live.

I really hope the admin team can please consider some of this stuff and make the site less inconvenient.

 Blazewing117

I have only just learned that my friend Skyder left us the day before yesterday. He was a local dragon, an artist and photographer and I saw him at many fur meets. I won't claim that I knew him as deeply as a number of my other friends did, but I can honestly only say good things about him.

He was around my age, only late twenties, and cancer took him young. Skyder was really encouraging to me as I wanted to be an artist. He even gave me a bunch of art educational material, so when I'm next ready to get back into art, I will think of him.

Even as Skyder's condition deteriorated, he had a wonderful girlfriend, Pye, who clearly loved him very much. I'm so glad that he had her. I know he had very supportive family and friends there for him the whole time. The tributes I've seen from other friends have been nothing but warm and positive, so I'll add mine too.

Thank you for the drawing in my book. I'm glad to have this to remember you by too.

Rest in peace, Skyder. You'll be missed.

This comes from the bottom of my heart at 2am on a work night. No particular reason, it's just a mood I wanted to express. Please forgive me for being a bit sappy and emotional, it just seems my heart has been here lately.

I can't believe how blessed I am to have the people in my life that I have. Those who I'm closest with will know who they are and that this is for them.

My dearest friends, close to my heart. There are a good many of you; I've met you all through this community in some respect. It's impossible for me to completely convey how much you mean to me. I often can't believe the incredible good that you do for me. Your patience, your support, the way you listen and are there for this silly dragon. How I deserve that, I do not know.

Just when I think I must be getting too much, crying to you again, you continue to be patient with me and reassure me. The warmth and kindness you show me makes me feel very lucky to have you.

I wish I could maintain more frequent contact with some of you, but often, such is our friendship that it feels like not a day has passed when we talk again after months. You're still right there, the same wonderful souls, and we pick up where we left off. It doesn't matter if we are too busy to talk for a long time. You're still there for me. Gosh I'm lucky to call you all my friends.

As much flak as this fandom gets (and I honestly think it's not completely undeserved), I've met so many quality souls through it. I'm so glad I've come to know you by expressing my dragonself. I wish I could meet more of you in person because you're wonderful and mean a lot to me. I'd give you an appreciative hug if I could.

Anyway, that's about all. I just felt like saying this. I wish you all good health from this red dragon.

Artist found! Thanks!

Tomorrow being the 5th of August, this dragon counts another circle around Sol! Had a low-key gathering today at home with some local friends. Now very tired and ready for a good sleep.
But yes! One year older. And hopefully wiser.

Stolen from  foxy_malone

FurDU is just a few short weeks away! I've gone every year since 2013 so this is my 7th DU! I'm excited!

-Where are you staying?
The con hotel

-What day are you getting there?
Thursday hopefully!

-How are you arriving?
Train

-Who will you be rooming with?
 nightintodream

-Who will you hang out with during the convention?
Frands! Old and new ^^

-Are there events you might be attending?
I will be DJing on the Saturday night at 9:00-10:30pm! Would love if you could come along!

-Will you be suiting?
No

-Do you do free art?
I'm not an artist ^^

-Do you do trades?
See above

-What is your gender?
Definitely not a girl dragon, really!!

-How old are you?
Twenty something

-How tall are you?
Chest height to a human

-Are you taken?
Complicated.

-Can I talk to you?
If you recently showered, yes :P

-Can I touch you?
Ask before hugs and that's alright.

-How can I find you?
Follow the scent of cinnamon.

-Can I visit your room?
Ask :)

-Can I buy you drinks?
Beers <3

-Can I give you stuff?
If it's edible ^^

-Can I hug or snuggle with you?
Generally no.

-Are you nice?
I'm a big fierce derg! Very scary! :3

-How long are you going?
Thursday night to Sunday night ^^

-If I see you, how should I get your attention?
Offer cinnamon roll

-Where will you be most of the time during the days?
Probably with friends or something!

-What/where will you be eating?
All of the things at all of the times

-Can I come with you for fun/food/etc.?
Food yes! I love going and getting food!

You know, after a while you end up realising that being a dragon isn't all it's cracked up to be. That you just want to move on... Be something else, something that truly represents your essence, your innermost soul, at the most fundamental level. That's what I need to do.

For such a long time I've felt that while Ashtalon has been a very close representation of how I feel inside, there was something -missing-. It's taken me such a long while to figure out what that is, and I think I know now.

Firstly, I need to choose the right colour to represent me feelings. Red and yellow... They were close, but what's best is to combine them, so I want to be orange.

Dragons can be on the rough side with those scales. Well, Ashtalon isn't, but I know I want to have an unambiguously soft body.

The scent of my character is very important to me (those who know my interests understand!) and I think that the cinnamon scent will be good to stay.

Size-wise, I was always happier on the smaller side, but I want to reduce my size further. Again with my interests... Small, cinnamon-scented... Those I want to keep. And I'd like to be warm, and always fresh.

Finally, species-wise. There's so many dragons... And Ashtalon is quite generic to be honest. So I'd like to pick something unique. But still recognisable! My interests again: perhaps something with good taste. Yes, a tasteful species choice is really important to be.

So without further ado, here is a summary of the changes to my sona:

-orange colour
-soft
-cinnamon scent
-warm and fresh
-tasteful

So the most appropriate thing for me is to change my sona to a cinnamon roll. Feral of course! I'm not really one to be an anthro. Being a cinnamon roll will fulfil all my wishes and I think it best represents who I am and how I feel inside. Orange, soft, cinnamon scented, warm and fresh, and tasty. It's pretty much perfect for me! <3

(just don't eat me, please!!) ^^;

I can't wait to get some art of my new sona to show in my gallery! Happy first of April, my lovelies, I love you all~

So I’ve arrived for this big convention with a bunch of other Australians and keen to experience this con! Perhaps I’ll see you here if you’re around too. First time in the USA!

That's how many times I have gone around the sun now. Yes!
I had a nice lil gathering on Sunday with some friends and then visited parents which was really nice.
I think this is a good age.

So the hotel for MFF opened just a short while ago, and despite sitting right on the page, waiting to go with adrenaline all through me, I spent over an hour trying to book a room and - nope. Error screen after error screen, nothing worked. And I had all my friends sitting in our Telegram chat and none of them could get one either. And none of the people on Twitter I know could get one either.
It's so disappointing because I had to get up at 2am Australian time in order to do this, I had it as an event in my calendar for weeks. So disappointed...
People are saying it was bots that snagged all the rooms. Of course I can't find any actual evidence for that, but given that I saw absolutely no one saying they actually got a room, it does look pretty sus.

Anyway, I did manage to book a room at an overflow hotel which is a big relief. I think it should be fun anyway!
But now is the time for me to go back to sleep. I need to be up for work in three hours... >.<
If you're going to MFF, please let me know and we can meet up! Especially if we are internet friends who haven't met up yet, that would be very cool. :3

See you at MFF!

This is directed at artists!
I sometimes search FA for "YCH" and order by most recent so I can find potential things to commission artists for. Often I see the name of the picture is something including "YCH". It's something that I'll go "oh, that's cool" and see that it's not a potential commissionable picture because it's a finished piece. IMO "YCH" should be for when the artist is looking for buyers and a finished YCH picture should be given some other title.
That would make it a bit easier when looking for potential pictures to commission. Just something that has been in my mind for a little! :)

So I am going to Midwest FurFest at the end of November/early December! It will be my first time travelling to the United States (I'm Australian) and I have -absolutely- no idea what to do after the convention!

I'll be in Chicago for the convention with a bunch of other Aussies but I would just love to meet up with some US friends afterwards as my fellow Australians will be scattering around to different places. So if you'll be at the convention or aren't too far away (I know the USA is a biiiiig place), I'd love to know! Because it seems like a missed opportunity if I were to go straight back to Australia after the convention. Pls let me know!

Details are here:
https://www.sofurry.com/market/view/offer?id=4517
Feel free to Telegram me (@ Ashtalon) or note me! I'm not the most active on SoFurry. Thank youuuu

A great artist friend of mine:  q-blackbun is finding it hard to save anything because all money is going to necessities with not much left over! He works in automotive and is really good at his job. Is there anyone in the Florida area who might know someone in that industry who could be looking to hire? Thank youuuu

 q-blackbun is facing homelessness due to high Florida expenses! He's drawn awesome art for me before: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/23576336/

His quality of work is fantastic and although he has other work outside furry, basic living expenses have become too much and he's needing some help, check his journal here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8526659/

Would like to help him keep a roof over his head! He is a great artist and hopefully we can help him out! Maybe we can help promote him.

So last Saturday I turned 25. Woah! I've had a good 25 years so far, so I'm determined to make the next 25 just as good! If FA is still around then it will be the year 2042. Insane!
And to answer the question "Do you feel older?" I'd say - just a bit! ;)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ieR.....Qc&t=4m45s

She's so cute >w<
4m 45s

<3

By  wing-of-chaos

And it's from this naughty picture: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17785630/

Stolen from  jaystoat

-Where are you staying?
The Mantra hotel, same place the convention's in

-What day are you getting there?
Thursday

-How are you arriving?
On the train!

-Who will you be rooming with?
 nightintodream &  drakonvectarus

-Who will you hang out with during the convention?
My friends <3

-Are there events you might be attending?
I'll be playing piano in the music show with  pjsaber AKA  kazza

-Will you be suiting?
Naw, I kind of lost interest in suiting myself. But I still love to appreciate others' suits! ^^

-Do you do free art?
I'm not very good at art so don't expect anything good ;P

-Do you do trades?
I can do music trades, like art for music!

-What is your gender?
Male

-How old are you?
24

-How tall are you?
Like almost 6 foot I think!

-Are you taken?
Almost kind of but not quite because distance >.<

-Can I talk to you?
If you follow the 6-2-1 rule, yes.

-Can I touch you?
Depends how well I know you.

-How can I find you?
Follow the cinnamon scent

-Can I visit your room?
If I invite you in.

-Can I buy you drinks?
Mhm~

-Can I give you stuff?
Yeah~

-Can I hug or snuggle with you?
Hugs are okay ^^

-Are you nice?
Most of the time.

-How long are you going?
Thursday to Tuesday :D

-If I see you, how should I get your attention?
Waving :)

-Where will you be most of the time during the days?
Out and about with friends I guess!

-What/where will you be eating?
Nando's, Ben & Jerry's, and other places with friends

-Can I come with you for fun/food/etc.?
If I know you, should be fine :)

I'm so excited! Particularly for the music show with Kaz. We've been practicing~