not only is the earth flat but its also hollow. the reptilian aliens have a machine that converts 3d space into 2d space. its in this hollow area that they hide the alien jet fuel that can melt steel beams. i know this because i dust my ceiling fan. but i found out its not actually dust its nano bots with government agendas. its also what they put in the vaccines along with the autism juice. these nano bots get in your brain and make flat things appear spherical.

the government is in cahoots with the reptilian aliens which is where they got this technology. it all goes back to abraham lincoln who invented the salad shooter. he didn’t have the technology to build it but his illegitimate african child did and on a whim turned it into a time machine. hoxwald lincoln was his name. in the 1940s he built the time machine linking it to the 1980s when they also built the time machine this time out of a snazzy pair of thigh-highs.

with this time tunnel established, they created the monster machine. they used this monster machine to create the montauk monster which inspired george w bush to fill the bat mobile with japanese beetles and then strap it to a plane. what plane you ask? why none other than the one used to fly into the world trade center. and because the plane was filled with alien jet fuel that can melt steel beams, david copperfield felt upstaged and so went on to fake his tic tacs returns.

there were implants in janet jacksons nipples which were placed there by the build-a-bear group. knowing that only the unwashed masses (the build-a-bear groups primary target) would be tuned in to the super bowl, they primed these implants to fire once britney spears tore off janet jacksons top. and so it was that a subliminal signal was sent through the broadcast, from nipple to viewers retina, restructuring their minds through strategic flashes of color chosen from a tachistoscopic spectrum. this subliminal bombardment caused the viewers to disregard the science behind global warming.

the reptilian aliens can only live in a carbon rich atmosphere which can be achieved on earth by emitting an inordinate amount of co2. once the atmosphere is changed to suit the biology of the reptilian aliens, they will emerge from their 2 dimensional sanctuary in the hollow of our flat earth whereupon they will commence the great extirpation. the build-a-bear group will then move to tunguska where the aliens first touched down back in the 1300s and also, coincidentally, where the moon landing faked its orgasm.

before the reptilian aliens emerge from the hollow in the earth, they will deactivate their fridge magnets which is the primary source of electromagnetism, that phenomenon only internet scientists are aware of that holds objects to the earth. with these powerful fridge magnets out of commission, the earth will then have to rely on the hoax of gravity which was invented by isaac newton, the founder of the arctic accord. with the pseudoscience of gravity now in place, this will disrupt the time tunnel between the 1940s and the 1980s, causing a temporal prolapse and the subsequent precipitation of the event known as hurricane katrina.

using an enzyme found exclusively in the rotting laundry of abandoned washing machines in new orleans, the reptilian aliens are able to fuel their unfurling engines. the unfurling engines are what propel the mother wheels through space. they treat space as a scroll, furling and then unfurling it, achieving near instant travel over vast distances. its in this manner that the reptilian aliens will ferry more of their ilk from faraway back to earth.

britney spears was coerced by her ceiling fan to tear away janet jacksons top. little did she know that her ceiling fan was rife with those aforementioned nano bots that, when traced, lead back to a guidestone in george. if its inscriptions are translated by a bibulous mendicant they yield proof that the build-a-bear group are intent on killing off all the poor people, and, whats more, they were responsible for the cancellation of beast wars.

Fellows before the Close

The poker game in the grotesquery commenced. Lannelfold cut the deck, slid it back to Drimilqueech who, giving it a further shuffle, began distributing the cards among the players. There were five, each with a unique deformity of his own. They ringed the green felt of the poker table with many a hoary glare, rheumy droop or malformed fold that might have been mouth or vestigial dewlap of unnecessary flesh. Touslebleet's head could be likened to the symbolic heart but with one lobe shriveled while the other, over-bloated and veiny, had the unnerving tendency to pulse if he gave a particularly vigorous blink. Apprehinge’s jaw, opening side fashion, its position where his right ear should be, worried a cashew. His nose sloped towards his clavicle, ending where his Adam’s apple would be if it wasn't residing in the region of his right shoulder. Though a non-smoker, his incessant coughing punctuated the tinkle of drinks and rustle of poker chips as Drimilqueech laid down the specificities to govern that round of the game. Goichurug was of the oriental persuasion or so it was surmised, his lack of tongue and teeth rendering him mute to inquiries. His ethnicity was still to that day a subject of some desultory debate. His deformity was the least extreme of the quintet on account of his eyelids flickering where the brows should be. You could see the bulges of his eyes swivel in their perpetually covered sockets whenever he attempted (but ultimately failed) to focus on the current speaker. Lannelfold nodded at the terms, lifting his brandy to perfectly functioning lips. His cheeks, however, which drooped to his shoulders, had to be lifted to his tiny ears to guide the liquid down his throat. He peered across the table through his right eye. The other was buried under folds of scalp. Drimilqueech nodded back, taking brief, rapid draws from the stubby cigar clenched by the slit in his forehead. There was a fistula fitted with a threaded plastic opening below a bulbous nose which looked to have once been on the verge of becoming two separate proboscises. Smoke trickled from his nostrils. All three of them. He screwed a tube into his fistula, turned on a small motorized pump and began sucking at his whiskey.
‘Nice day, ’tis,’ Lannelfold remarked. Nods made the circuit as without a distant explosion lit the night.

A skeletal periscope skewers graveyard soil, sampling the gassy necropolis. Nacreous phalanges scrabble, clatter, strain. A corpse is ejected in a spray of earth. The nearby kiosk still open, washes a cobbled avenue in dim candle flickers. The corpse selects that day’s herald and finds nothing to be read. The paper in its entirety is blank save for the smears of decay from the corpse who, letting it fall to the gutter, shambles into an awaiting carriage. It clicks its destination on what remains of its teeth for no tongue has it to expostulate the flesh. No horse drew this carriage only a dun mass, mottled and oily that pulsed, undulated, its bulk squelching over the cobbles, leaving the kiosk and its light, and a dissipating odor of sour rags and the dankest drain humors of mildewed bereavement.

I breakfast among the sizzling motes of arc-sodiums where even photons spare the passing time before their dimension dissipates proportion. There I sip from effulgent plasmas that to my ear was entailed disparate syllables and only in my way could be pieced messages but glimpsed as light by most that to my hearing are secrets in a vacuum convexed.