You know.. .you are having a bad time....when both YOUTUBE AND TIKTOK... have the "need help?" 988 lifeline number....directed at you...

..... Please be effing considerate..... I was up most of the night listening to the booming and banging..... You know.... Some of us WORKING PEOPLE need to be up at the asscrack of before dawn.....i could barely function with out a massive caffeine intake

Hey guys.. i know i dont do this but I am in need of help.... Since my surgery the bills have been coming in at a steady pace and I didnt get paid after i came home because I came home on a pay week.. which means its gonna take another week before I get paid so over been working the last 2 weeks with out pay and my short term disability checks were used up already.... Any help would be appreciated....a dollar.. 50 cents... anything....

Paypal: Message me
Gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/cassies-.....-expense-funds

I'm still kicking, it's been 3 weeks and about 3 days since I had my surgery. I had all my post ops....and all is well I head home *looks at calendar* tomorrow at 1pm central. I am so happy I did this, my bank account isnt........

Hey all! I had my surgery yesterday and all went well! Now I'm recovering!

Guys, gals.. Non-binary pals.... in 4 hours i get on a plane and fly down to texas.... for surgery... GRS.... I'm terrified... I'm Afraid...I'm nervous...i hate flying.. i have to fly some where I'm not prepared to live in for a month....I don't want to leave home.. I don't want to leave my cat

The anxiety is still creeping.. its getting harder to eat my favorite foods.... i can't eat alot anymore.... ...sleep is either too much.. or too little.... idk if i can do this....

.... My anxiety won't be quiet... my nervousness .... is rampant.... ...Ive been eating less on some days.. and more on others.... 36 days till i go for surgery.... 32 till i board a plane..... then I'm not around for 1 month...........I'm scared.. I'm afraid... I'm scared....

Sooo.. insurance states approved.... as in network... but the surgeon's office is still stating they have never been in Network.... Huh... funny... guess a lawyer is gonna be needed soon cuz I smell issues in the future.... But for the time being... It does look like.. I will be flying out to Austin, TX in august for SRS/GCS/GRS

So.... my life is now in shambles.......or feels like it... 1 and a half years ago i reached out to a surgeons office for the big one....gave them all my info and what not... told they had a1 wait for consultation, but then because i had Insurance company X (not using real names here) i could try their alternate office in Texas of all places....got a consultation in a week.... they had all the same paperwork the main did....(REMEMBER THIS FACT) got a consultation... spoke about my fears worries and what would actually happen and questions blah blah blah.....set up another contact in Jan 2019, ... ffw to a few months later as i was looking up hair removal options for the big one.....partner loses work.. no longer financially viable to get it... so it skipped my mind... hence the contact in January where i could get time to do so...........January comes and goes.... I contact in February... set a date for august for the big one... get told you'll get an email in a few days.... days.. weeks.. .months go by as my mind was elsewhere in the Overtime and my job......I check in march to be sure they had all 3 letters... was told yes..ok.. all is well.....Email comes in in May... oh.. "you shoulda had this done 6-9 months in advance...."....looks at the calendar.. looks at when i got the email.... THREE MONTHS TILL THE DATE..............ok.. rush time... can i get it does in a mostly timely fashion... possibly... major oh shit.... nother email comes in in the beginning of june... DEADLINE... june 7th... "oh we're missing a letter and you were denied by your insurance because of this.... can you get it?"... they said they had all of it.... find out they only had a rejected duplicate.. that they submitted.. great.. ok ... i get the missing letter to them.. nother email 3 days laters DEADLINE... june 10th "we are not in the network for Insurance Company X and have never been in network for them,we need you do do this" ..... HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE.........you have had my insurance information since AT LEAST December 2017 remember how I said becasue i have Insurance company X I can use the other facility?... why am I finding this out now.......they couldnt give me an explanation nor did their administration line help at all....I did what they wanted.... Its now June 13th... I havent heard a fucking word.. not a cancellation.. not a re schedule option... NOTHING I have been put more stress than in the last month... than i have been in 3 years....I'm sick to my stomach every day.... i can barely eat... if i eat.. i stress eat...I'm losing sleep.... My work production and quality are suffering... and I've missed work.. and Gone home because i'm having near constant Anxiety attacks............I just feel like i should give up... I'm meant to be stuck as an incomplete woman....there is no way i can afford this without insurance covering a good chunk of it.... I.... I just wanna die... and end this pain and torment....

So get this... I just wake up a few days ago and i see an email from my surgeons office... yes I'm having surgery...yes.. THAT ONE...and i thought it was more information stuff, but NOPE!! its a "Hi! we were approached by a filmmaker studio from canada!vand since you are having surgery coming up with one of the surgeons they approached...would you like to partake in this 6 part documentary series?" Soooo i said yes.. and I;m getting a call from the production firm at 10am.... Holleee shhiittt... ima be a star :P

I HAVE A DATE FOR SNIP SNIP!!! AUG 7th 2019!!!!

I have no talent to draw...stuck in a job that refuses to promote me 6 times in a row... im stressed at work pullingOT and now.. i have to DOUBLE my OT cuz my fiance just lost his job.... i want to curl up oin a corner and die.... i will litterally have to be working doubles and weekends till he can get a job.... and ive alreadybeen working OT for a month... and im already pissy cuz i keep getting woken up at 8 am after a noon to 1am shiftthe night before...why am i sucha talentless failure... maybe i should just go join the military... and be a 31 bravo....

another year done.....another year to be suicidal.....yay...great way to start off 2017......depressed and suicidal...

Well...i Quit my job at Target a few day ago......and I have another job...my first day was yesterday....Success....I have my second shift tonight.....NO MORE WONDERING WHEN I WORK!!! NO MORE TAKING ORDERS FOR RETAIL BULLSHIT!!!! I AM AN OFFICE KITTYGIRL!!! ~dances around~

[x] the dark
[ ] staying single forever
[ ] being a parent
[ ] giving birth
[ ] being myself in front of others
[ ] open spaces
[x] closed spaces
[x] heights
[ ] dogs
[ ] birds
[ ] fish
[x] spiders
[ ] flowers or other plants
Total so far: 4

[ ] being touched
[ ] fire
[ ] deep water
[x] snakes
[ ] silk
[x] failure
[x] success
[x] thunder/lightning
[ ] frogs/toads
[ ] girlfriends/boyfriend's dad
[ ] girlfriends/boyfriend's mom
[ ] rats
[x] jumping from high places
[ ] snow
Total so far: 9

[ ] rain
[ ] wind
[x] crossing hanging bridges
[x] death
[ ] heaven
[x] being robbed
[x] falling
[ ] clown
[ ] dolls
[x] large crowds of people
[ ] men
[ ] women
[ ] having great responsibilities
[x] doctors, including dentists
[x] tornadoes
Total so far: 16

[ ] hurricanes
[ ] incurable diseases
[ ] sharks
[ ] Friday the 13th
[ ] ghosts
[ ] poverty
[ ] Halloween
[x] school
[ ] trains
[ ] odd numbers
[ ] even numbers
[x] becoming blind
[x] becoming deaf
[ ] growing up
Total so far: 19

[x] creepy noises in the night
[ ] bee stings
[ ] not accomplishing my dreams/goals
[ ] blood
[ ] dinosaurs
[ ] the welcome mat
[ ] high speed
[ ] throwing up
[ ] falling in love
[ ] super secrets
Total: 20

If you wish to post this journal, it's been requested that you title it, "I'm afraid of __ out of 72 fears"

if you get more than 30, I highly suggest counseling
if you get more than 20, you're paranoid
if you get 10-20, you're normal.
*if you get 1-9, you're difficult to frighten.
*If you get 0, you're fearless.

well...I have come to a discovery...it's been 9 months, 1 week and 2 days since i started HRT.....I AM LOVING EVERY MOMENT OF IT!! ~dances~

If any fur here is LGBT involved, and lives near Chicago and are going to pridefest tomorrow i'll be there!! Meet Asuna! lol I'm bringing my future wife with me ^_^ she's a fox nya nya!

its been 33 weeks since i started estrogen, and damn i feel wonderful!! theres ups and downs but still quite lovely! this is the most recent video of all my pics combined to show my progress ^_^ its also been a month and a half since i moves away from my father......it hurts knowing he despises me.....so i left you'll see that in the video where sudden ly the picture style changes from holding a camera to not holding a camera

Well....according to the state of IL's DMV....i am now female....legally...so...i may have been miss on the net...but its MISS now irl....so... my name has been legally changed on tuesday from well... a name i never want to hear again, to Cassandra MacKenzie (insert last name here) so to you folks its now either Miss or Ms. Cass, Asu, Cassie or Asuna! ~dances around

has it really be about 5 months on estrogen? OH MY FRIGGING CELESTIA! https://scontent-b-iad.xx.fbcdn.net.....31204838_n.jpg IT HAS BEEN.... O.O hey look a ring on my paw.....~thinks~ thats my left paw... o.O

I came out to my manager lastnight and HR during my lunch today....well...went better than I expected, and I will be ditching my name tag for a new one ^_^ with a proper name

edit: Did i forget to mention the name? Just call me CASSIE CAT! =3

I've been on HRT for about 2 full weeks since oct 2 when the first dose was administered...I have stared noting changes....Softer fur (skin :P) softer muzzle (face :P) my mate says I have a different scent, I don't small like I did before HRT...and I seem to be more in touch with my feelings....and my therapist does agree....I have been a woman my entire life....I Internalize alot of things.....like a woman unlike men who..well...vocalize it...

sept 4th was not the day for hormones...due to events....my father shut off my cell phone....which was the number the doctor called to cancel her appointment with me for reasons that are none of my business....new date..october 2nd