So I've come to realize that I may or may not have a lot of old art that I've never actually posted on here from old sketchbooks. So I'm gonna try and get some of that posted.

ToTK and BotW are not Zelda games but games that were attached to the Zelda franchise. No I have never played them but that's also because they never piqued my interest. I want to specify that I am not saying that they are bad games. What I am saying is that they are only "Zelda games" because the inclusion of Zelda iconography. Now I know someone is going to say but the original Zelda game was also an open world game with no direction. Yes but the first was based on the idea of exploration and was a diamond in the ruff polished by its later iterations. ToTK and BotW were open world because it was media wide trend and one that is thankfully ending. It allowed for game companies to little to no effort in story and everything into "hours of gameplay", which for other games types and franchises works great. However, to take a franchise that has been extremely linear since it's second game and go "Eh f**k the story" is honestly why I never was intrigued by them and honestly never will be. I hope that there is not another open world Zelda made in my lifetime or if there is, a linear game be brought alongside it.

From this point forward I will no longer be posting anything on FA.

So I'm having trouble sleeping rn cause I'm at my sister's house and the last sustenance I had before going to bed was a can of Mtn dew. I'm just gonna spout my plan if I ever win the lottery. Btw these are just rough approximations.

So if I ever win the lottery first thing I'm going to do is put about half into a trust fund for myself 5 years down the line as well as a college trust fund for my nephew when he turns 18.

Next I'd take most of what's left and put it in stock/bonds as well as a savings account that has high interest but also penalties for removing money too often.

After that I'd have 5 million for myself for the 5 years until the trust fund goes back into my pocket. While still living in my apartment. I would buy a house with multiple acres. I would probably aim for 7-8 acres and for the house to face east/west and not north/south.

Then I would pay for exterior renovations, making the outside of the house as efficient as possible, including finding a way to incorporate moss cement and adding solar panels onto a redone roof. The window also be replaced with energy efficient ones as well.

Once the exterior is done I would have the interior gutted down to the studs. Any rotting wood would be replaced, piping would all be replaced with galvanized steel (except drains). HVAC would be replaced along with a new furnace and AC. Wiring for electrical would all be replaced with the best wiring. Ethernet cable would either be added or be replaced with CAT6A wiring as well as a server room built in the basement. All of those would be organized so that repairs are unbearably easy.

Once all that is done then top-notch spray foam insulation would be added. Afterwards soundproof drywall would be put up everywhere except the bathrooms which obviously get waterproofed drywall. The interior will the n be made to look like a 1920s home complete with tiling and ornate wood paneling. The only thing not made to look like it came out of the 1920s in my house will be the couches and armchairs because the only thing I will go for comfort over design is where I'll be sitting my booty. The windows will also have privacy film made to look like stained glass

The master bedroom will be the only room will get none of the 1920s treatment because it will be my VR room with 1 reclining couch, a brand new computer setup and 4 base stations in the corners of the room. This is mostly because I want to be so few things in the room for fear of self injury.

After it's finished and whatever lease I'm on ends I would move in.

After the 5 years when my trust fund for myself re-enters my bank account, I would begin to change the 7-8 acres of land I own into housing. 1 acre of land per lot where I would have a house 3D printed(yes that's a thing). On the edge of each 2 touching acres there would be road with the houses facing each other, stopping at 3 roads connecting out into the community. One pair would connect to the main connecting road to keep them facing east/west. The road connecting these roads would have a 1acre park area in the center. Each house would be equipped with solar panels as well as moss cement on the exterior this making the houses energy efficient.

Once the houses are fully built I would sell them for low prices (20k- 50k) to friends and family. The area would be named "Kangaroo Court". I would additionally start furry meets/ BBQs in the acre sized park.

Additionally each house would have 1 pine tree in the front yard as well as each house having a different fruit growing tree as well as trees lining the outer property line of their acre to naturally instill privacy.

Now I fully understand that that would probably deplete a lot of my money so I'd probably just stop there and live the rest of my life going to cons and working small jobs to pass the time.

That's pretty much my entire plan for if I won the lottery. Beyond this it'd be up in the air.

So I had a dream about a weird Marvel movie with like new marvel characters but like NSFW... Kinda. There was one character, either played by Mo'Nique or Yvette Nicole, that had these brown swirly eye goggles and they used a knife that was also brass knuckles. Jason Sudeikis was a lawyer who decided to dress up as a super hero because he worked with superheroes. There was a random frat guy who I don't think had powers he was just kind of hyping. There was a woman who was like a mix of she hulk and poison Ivy. But the weirdest one was the newest member, played by the guy who played Napoleon Dynamite, called The Orc. He could conjure 2 tongues that would allow him to eat anything and the resulting burp would cause either an AoE or targeted immediate blueberrying followed by... Well I'll say it nicely, juice expulsion through the anal cavity. He could also transform and/or transgender people by running into them. Then my alarm went off and I woke up. My dream I having during naps are freaking weird.

So I've decided I want to slightly change the lore of my fursona, Tundra. For the most part they're the same but instead of having a base form, I want them to be something more akin to a slime. They can form and change their body at will in any way they want but it takes 5-10 minutes for his goo/slime body to solidify into the form they have currently taken, meaning that form is essentially their current base. It makes shenanigans a little more ffun

This is not a new year thing or a resolution, I'm just deciding that some of the characters/ forms could stand to be retired to allow for recreations of them, possibly to be mixed with other characters to created newer characters that cover more ground. If you see a character you particularly liked of mine get moved to the scraps folder it's most likely because I made them a long time ago and never actually used them for anything. This could bring about the creation of characters that take up the idealistic/ fetishistic space of 2-3 characters. I'm going to put a couple of Tundra's forms in retirement as well as I have not used them for quite sometime if at all. Obviously there are the big characters that I will not be retiring like Nathan, Tundra, and Samson. More spur of the moment characters like Sunny, Dawn, or Ron will however be retired as I have failed to do anything with them after the initial creation.

To be honest we all knew this would happen eventually and now the time has come.

Just had a really dumb thought but what if you fed all of Sokugeki: Yukihira no Soma to an ai and had it make what it thought a generic episode would be. Or if you did it with any anime.

One thing that I have noticed the abdl community rarely gets art of is just people wearing everyday clothes, like clothes an average person would where, with a noticable diaper bulge. Like, for example, https://www.furaffinity.net/view/42169580/ or https://www.furaffinity.net/view/15050761/ where its abhorrently obvious that they're wearing a diaper in a mundane scenario. Heck even if people were noticing it I'd take it but it seems that that type of abdl art is few and far between at maybe 1 to every 100-200 pic where the diaper is just on full display. I will fully admit that I am maybe not as into what I'll call "Babycore" and I'd rather justy see diaper related scenarios shown as if it were a thing that were just a normal thing that happens. By normal thing I dont necessarily mean normal in the world, I mean just normal for that person. Its partly the reason I made Alex Brahm, https://www.furaffinity.net/view/46444769/ , because one of the things I've rarely seen in the time I've been in the fandom is a fursona in a suit with the full poof of a diaper barely being fitted into a nice suit. Literally maybe like 10. Additionally I think a thing that should be seen far more than I've seen it put into art at all is The idea of a random person on the street quickly having their under poof out inside their pants kinda of like this pic https://www.furaffinity.net/view/35894192/ but with maybe less ripping, whether they become fully aware that its happening or have no idea its happening like in this story https://www.furaffinity.net/view/31022859/ . That kinda of art I've seen even less of. Hell I'd even take a sequence of barely 3 nearly identical images with the single difference being that the subject pants just get slightly poofier.

There is a trend that I see in the udder/ cow sect of the tf and anthro sects of the furry fandom. Why is it that every fucking time that someone does a somewhat good cow tf or a cow anthro, THEY ADD BOOBS? For one the udder would replace the boobs. I specifically love tf sequences where a person starts with double Ds and then they slide down to their crotch directly over whatever genitalia they have. For 2 when i search for udders it is whith the thought of the boobs having been removed, yet whenever I do search it, at least half if not 75% of the results are boobs abundant. Additionally, and I know I'm calling out a specific chat here, if you name your chat "Udder Chat" or something along those lines and 50% of the images posted are either sans udder because of multiboob bs or if they do havee udders theyre overshadowed by the biggest goddamn mother fucking boobs you could put on a girl and not expect her back to immediately snap to a 90 degree angle. Like im tired of looking up the word udder and the first image 50% of the time is a cow anthro with the saddest tiniest udder you've ever seen and DD or DDD boobs. I understand that people are gonna say that more people like boobs than udders. Yes. But why are those the same people drawing cow anthros. If you like boobs draw boobs but please I just want to search the word udder and not have to scroll to find something that is without breasticles.

I hate that nowadays people's hate of a specific fetish or a specific sexuality means that they can't possibly like the person as a person. Like, yes i am abdl, yes that part of it too but like that doesn't mean im any less of a person. It's not like it's the thing i talk about 24/7. Honestly I don't think about it at all. I think about the news and the weather and how is capitalism gonna fuck me over today just like the next person so please, unless the person does show themselves to make the worst part of themselves the biggest part of themselves, give them a chance. You may find they're worth keeping around.

Im realizing something about myself. I like sloppy disgusting fetishes that are gross and make giant mess but if i look at how I am irl I'm the exact opposite. Like, i like abdl stuff and fart stuff. Irl I try to be prim proper and i shower every day if not multiple times a day. Then hyper stuff. I love hyper dick and hyper balls and hyper bulge but irl I'm so insecure i don't like taking my shirt off. I think the only fetish of mine that isn't a direct opposite of my irl self is probably my love of ass. That one transcends my brain and comes out unchanged.

I know. I know. I'm biased but after watching the movie that beat out Puss In Boots: the Last Wish. I can't fathom any good reason why Pinocchio would have snubbed it. I can think of many bad reasons. Many of them due to the story, director, cast, and name itself being an eyecatcher for old fuddy-duddies who have fallen too far out of touch with the current populace. Don't get me wrong I thought it was a good movie but even taking into account reason i can fathom it winning would be that the marketing team played to the preferences of judges. I understand that animated films can also be dreary and sad. I feel that it was written to be for those remembering the hardest days of their lives, THEIR lives, and we brought war in. God am i tired of seeing so many academy award winners winning because they harken back to WW2. I may be young but we understand it was hard time for you and you can keep reminding us over and over but please stop wrapping movies around it as additive. For a large portion of this film it felt like someone had made a nice dinner and then accidentally spilled the salt shaker. The salt wasn't needed in the first place and you made it even worse. Secondly, why were all the names you could find needed on this film. I dare you to look at the cast of Pinocchio and say you dont recognize at least 5-7 names. You look at the other movie, the one i have bias towards, i could give you 3 names at most, 3, and even those names are not as well known as they used to be. Plus they didn't plaster their Academy Award winning director's name over the goddamned movie name. Oh goodness Guillermo del Toro made oh it must be better. So you'd listen to the critics paid top dollar by the companies who the make the movies that any movie is better than the other. Statistics of big movie companies have failed. Nowadays it doesn't matter if a movie is good or bad it just has to make an impact. Third, it just wasn't that good. To be honest the biggest discerning factor over my anger at The Last Wish losing to it is how each film left me feeling. Usually even movies that gritty and playfully serious like Pinocchio, if they're actually good, leave me with a sense of empowerment, like I want to do something. I've watched the Help multiple times it's comedically gritty but with this film i just felt empty. Like almost nothing was learned. Of course Pinocchio learned the beauty of mortality but did the movie really teach it. I would say it honestly undermined it in the end. However, if you look over to The Last Wish, that had a similar moral of treating your mortality correctly, it clearly and concisely shows that you shouldnt treat your life like it's worthless, you should treat it like every moment is something to be treasured and it did an amazing job of that. Looping this back into my original point. I believe that since it did such a phenomenal job of explaining the beauty of life i felt empowered to run out and make every day worth a damn. I didn't get that from Pinocchio. What i got from Pinocchio was that life ends and it kinda sucks. Since Sebastian used his wish right at the end to save Pinocchio, it essentially Ctrl alt deleted the big moral that it felt the whole story had been careening towards. It honestly as if someone said "Wait, wait. We have to make this marketable to children. We can't kill Pinocchio now that he's mortal." To be quite honest i believe they should've let him die. It'd feel more meaningful than a wish being the only thing to save him. Hell even Disney tear BS would've felt more meaningful cause at least then the lesson is still learned. Comparatively, The Last Wish took a very heavy theme/moral and was able to not only accomplish stating it clearly but stacking on top of it with every single character's ending. Most ending with an understanding that what they have is worth it and one ending on the lack of realization that his demise was completely due to his selfishness. It's cut clearly. I won't admit there weren't any flaws but the fact that the judges of the Oscars chose an honestly mediocre movie over a goddamned masterpiece should be telling us that maybe it's time to take a break from all those big name companies due to them becoming worthless cash grabby schlock. At least Everything Everywhere All At Once got the recognition it deserved.

Thanks for coming to my Ted X rant. Don't forget to buy the keychain on your way out.

I am coming to hate friday more and more the more I work a Wed-Sat shift overnight. I used to hang out with friends on vrchat every friday but now since my weekend doesnt start until midday Sunday I dont get to hang out with the majority of them and its starting to make me depressed cause there some people I used to hangout with every friday that I pretty much havent hung out with since I started my new shift. I just bought a Valve Index vr bundle kit from steam and now I'm unsure of the purchase since I dont go on vrchat as much now. I just wish people wouldnt run themselves out on fridays and then Saturdays and Sundays theyre to tired or hung over to hop on. I mean I get people have other things to do and its a bit selfish but I just wanna ask for one weekend out of each month.

I hate it when I remember a really good story that i found a long time ago and just can't ever remember what they're called or enough details to find them.

For example: (Nsfw)

1. A downtrodden young man wakes up after a "fun" night and eats the breakfast laid out by the man he was with. The young man feels queasy as the other man tells him he wants to give him a better life. Young man TFs into a golden retriever/ Labrador/ some other dog specifically called golden.

2. A man and woman out with a hazmat suited rescuing party get separated in an alleyway. Man somehow gets infected and the latex hazmat suit tightens to his body as his body changes in it. The latex is stretched so tightly over his enlarged ass that the woman clearly can see their brand new gaping ass as his balls swelling into the yellow latex.



These are stories on FA that i have searched for to no avail and I'm so saddened because they were honestly some of my favorite stories over the years.

So I posted this idea in a discord server a while back and nobody really commented on it so I thought I'd comment it here and see what people say.

I had what i think would be a pretty cool idea for pokemon.
So you start out pokemon the normal way, ya know, 3 starters. And then you bump into another trainer accidentally. You turn to face them and something in the back of your mind tells you that something is off.
The professor of this region rushes you along after explaining that it's his nephew whos learning to battle as well.
The game goes on normally, except you always notice multiple things that are off about nephew. At the end of your journey,either before or after the legendary story. Nephew confronts you as suddenly they reveal themselves to be Mewtwo. It was an experiment that they were working on with the professor to see if he'd be able to assimilate into society.
Unfortunately i would think for the rival battle afterwards it would be the first ever where you specifically battle a pokemon who is also a pokemon trainer.

I hate the fact that there are people i hang out with and consider friends that, if they ever found out i was ABDL, would cease all contact with me. And i don't mean people that are abusive, manipulative, or toxic. I mean people that genuinely bring me happiness in my seas of sorrow. Btw, for those that know me well enough, i do not mean anyone i live with. 2 of them already know and the 3rd isn't the type who'd care. He'd judge me but wouldn't care.

And honestly i know I'm not actually friends with them. I just hate thinking that one day the specific people will stumble upon my FA and suddenly I'll be blocked by them on everything. It keeps me anxious, even if i think i have enough rapport with them that they'd maybe change their view. For all intensive purposes i believe myself to be a fairly chill and cool guy, even if half the time I'm buggin' out cause i said something lightly rude 20 minutes ago and am expecting someone to tell at me later in a private setting. I'm fairly certain i have RSD [Rejection sensitive dysphoria] ). Why do people have to be so unwilling to hear another person's side nowadays?

I am opening up for commissions in regards to recent events. I'll need to do a few commissions to meet my rent.


https://www.furaffinity.net/view/39720366/

So when i was 20 or 21 i moved in with my dad and his wife. In 4 months i had had enough and had my family come and help me move out of his house and back in with my mom. The reason? Verbal abuse suddenly became physical, even if it wasn't on purpose.

Reading the Little things by Gamer2 brought this and a thought to my mind. If i ever went with a friend to a house where they were still living with their parents i would have a friend coming over with a U-Haul van within the hour and i would be in their room helping them grab anything that meant something to them and packing them some clothes because no one deserves that kind of abuse from anyone, especially their parents. I would literally have their parents held in another room just so the other person could peacefully leave. When my friend finally has everything they want i tear their parents a new one before sending said friend over to my residence and if need be, would walk to an establishment down the road and grab an Uber. It saddens me to know end that people would act like her parents in that comic. The worst argument that became the norm is "I brought you into this world and I'll take you out" because you're implying 2 things, that you're willing to kill them because they misbehave or that they somehow asked to be born. You have 0 rights to their life even if they are children. If they disobey you discipline them in a way they understand and no i don't mean try to be their friend because you're still their parent and you need to teach them what's ok. Hell when i was younger i got the belt. But never NEVER verbally abuse your children. You are to be their parent you are to be someone they feel they can come to about their problems. In my current life, no i would not go to my parents about my problems but that's because i live a full state away from them. If i had to i absolutely would. The relationship i have with my parents is the bare minimum. Your child should not be afraid to come to you with a problem. But they also shouldn't be your best friend. And when they turn 18 you do not control what they do with their life beyond getting them on track to being able to move out and live on their own.

Sorry had to vent a bit. Cause it reminded me of how my dad's wife would act towards my sisters and I.

So if you saw my last journal you know that I may be in a tight spot for the next few weeks. If anyone would like to commossion anything from you may have a chance to in the next few days.

I know its after 9pm and my brain is just over-exaggerating but sometimes I really feel like no one wants me around. Like I'm just a waste of everyone's time. Sometimes I feel so worthless. Plus on top of that shitty customers may have ruined plans that had set to start in October cause some dumbass went to an emissions test WHILE SICK. I DONT GIVE A FLYING FUCK WHAT THE PRESIDENT SAYS, C O V I D H A S N O T E N D E D. The media and big companies are just tired of dealing with it. Just because the government says the pandemic has ended means absolutely nothing. Big business just stepped in and gave someone money. The numbers are still there. Its not like they went away. Now because people are tto dumb to actually pay attention and just wanna listen to what the news tells them I could end up not being able to pay rent because I have to get myself tested and possibly call out of work. Thanks big business for continuously ruining my life.

So for the next week about Im open for commissions. I wanna get some extra cash to use

Ya know I'm an really glad that i am just DL and not a little. Could you imagine? A 6'9" person toddles over to you and asks for a baba in just a childish T-shirt and a pamp. Hysterical thought, i know.

So I am in need of a little bit of money and I'm going to open for 4 commission slots for the next few days. My price sheet is here https://www.furaffinity.net/view/39720366/ . Please note me if you are interested



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Second journal.

If you haven't seen, I've opened a few slots so if you're intrigued by getting something from me just dm me